washington my way

i love washington. i guess it is obvious from my earlier posts. this trip started off like any other. very simple-pick up a school group and take them to d.c. things changed quickly. it started off by me being one hour late to pick them up. the directions given me were wrong and the incorrect directions were supported by my gps. when i picked them up, i apologized profusely and i realized then that this was going to be a great trip. i asked if they had an agenda and the leader said no. they knew where they wanted to go but after that it was pretty much up to spontaneity and traffic.
we saw and did so much in 2 full days. we hit the ground running about 1000 and we would get back to the hotel around midnight. seeing d.c. at night is almost as cool as seeing it during daylight. our last night, we went on a dinner cruise on "the spirit of mt. vernon" and it was very nice. the kids (and adults ate and danced and had a good time. while they were inside, i had the chance to go outside and enjoy the downtown lights from the potomac. we went by reagan national. the planes came right over the ship and when they landed, it looked they were landing in the water. so cool.
we got to go to Arlington National Cemetery and yes, i cried. i always do. whenever i go, i always have an agenda. this time it was section 60. that is where the casualties from iraq/afghanistan are laid to rest. it is very sobering to walk around and see the birthdates of these heroes who gave their lives for you and me. the ones who were born in '85, '86, 87 really got to me. i have a 20 year old daughter whom i love very much. i can remember when she was born, were i was in my life, where i was working, etc. some of these heroes were born around that time and as i think of her and the joy of my firstborn and i know the parents of these people felt the same things i did. where we are today is very different.
i am proud of my children. they are the joy in my life that i desire most right after my relationship with Christ. i look forward to seeing them, touching them and being with them. i ache at times because they are not near enough.
the parents of these kids are proud of them. the difference is mine are here and theirs are not. no more hugs, phone calls or visits. i can not imagine their pain. i pray for them. i pray for their lost one (s). i am grateful for all their loved ones did for me and you. and if it really matters, i grieve with them. when i am at Arlington i am aware that these men and women don't get visited often enough. it is an honor to go and be with them, pray over them, and even talk to them. i don't know anything other than what the headstone says. one day, i will see them and have the pleasure of shaking their hand.
what an honor that will be.
until next time...

long day, big win

high school band competitions are becoming amazing productions. i had a weekend trip that took a large high school band from kingsport to murfreesboro. my day started by leaving home at 0400. i arrived in kingsport at 0700 and then drove to murfreesboro. all told, about 365 miles. we arrived about 1230 and we did not leave for another 12 hours. here is some info for you to think about:
* this is the largest high school band in tennessee-285 in the competition band and over 400 in the football band. there are only about 2000 students in the whole school. that means about 1 in 5 students are in the band.
* they are larger than the university of tennessee pride of the southland marching band.

* this was a "lite" trip-7 buses, 1 tractor trailer, another trailer pulled by a truck and appx 25 chaperone's and helpers.

* they travel extensively- they have played at the macy's thanksgiving day parade, tournament of roses parade and countless other programs.

* they are extremely talented, gifted and well led.

this group was a typical group who travels alot-polite but not really outgoing-until you got to know them. once they all got used to me, they were very polite and respectful. they were a fun group and very disciplined. watching them warm up was impressive. seeing them perform with such precision was inspiring. during their finals performance, there was a bassoon solo. bassoons are not your typical marching band instrument so it had to be "miked". it was so soft and such a pretty piece of music. it was the kind of piece that while he was starting, people stopped what they were doing just to listen. when they finished, they were shown what i think was ultimate respect-kids from other schools gave them a standing ovation!!! it was really cool to witness this event.
it was the kind of trip i ended up thanking them for allowing me to be a part of. it was a memorable experience and i am grateful i had they chance to not only meet some respectful and talented kids, it was a pleasure to meet so many chaperone's and parents who make all of this happen. without them, at best this would have been "organized chaos" at it's finest. by they way, they "earned" second place and the governors trophy!!!

until next time...

Navy SEAL Lt. Michael Murphy

i don't often write about individuals. most are about group or team players coming together for a win. in this case it is about one person.
Lt. Murphy was killed in afghanistan in june 2005. recently he was awarded the medal of honor, the highest medal given to anyone in the military. i went to the army's website to copy/paste a copy of the citation but it was not there.
why is this so important?
Lt. Murphy is the first medal of honor recipient killed in afghanistan. his honoring was propaganda on cnn, msnbc and cnbc. he did not receive any attention above the fold or below the fold in the new york times. fox news was the only one to give it a fair shake.
in researching this, here are some comments posted:

"Michael wasn't into medals and calling attention to himself," Daniel Murphy said. "But all these people are saying Michael's actions are so special he deserves the Medal of Honor."

Murphy, who was 29, was killed in a fierce firefight in mountainous terrain along the Afghanistan-Pakistan border. He led a four-man special reconnaissance unit that was secreted into the Hindu Kush mountains along the border in June 2005.

The unit was reported to be trailing a high-ranking terror leader near 10,000-foot peaks when they were ambushed and overrun by scores of insurgent fighters on June 28, according to Newsday interviews and media reports. The newspaper Navy Times reported in October that Murphy's actions -- "far outnumbered and surrounded by enemy" -- were being reviewed for the U.S. Navy's first Medal of Honor awarded since the Vietnam War.

A troop transport helicopter that sped to their rescue with eight Navy SEALs and eight Army commandos aboard crashed after being hit by a rocket-propelled grenade. All aboard were killed. A single member of Murphy's team managed to elude capture, and eventually was reunited with U.S. forces.

Relatives of the SEALS have said the lone American survivor told them that Murphy came to his rescue when he was trapped by insurgents during the battle, according to the interviews and reports.

The survivor also told relatives that Murphy was shot when he climbed to higher ground and into the open to send an electronic call for help. Wounded, Murphy completed the call, then continued fighting. It is this action that is believed to be at the heart of his consideration for the Medal of Honor.
navyseals.com website

"At a White House ceremony Monday, Navy SEAL Michael Murphy's family received the Medal of Honor. The sacrifice Lt. Murphy made epitomizes the best of America, and that's why we are leading with the story.
billoreilly.com

of other notes, bill maher was heckled by far left wing extremists live on his hbo program. this received more attention than the medal of honor ceremony.

in Arlington National Cemetery, over 300,000 brave men and women are buried. as you enter, there is a sign reminding you that these are sacred grounds. i do not know where Lt. Murphy was laid to rest. i do know this, it is sacred as well.
i am adding a link to the Arlington website that features the video of trace adkins haunting song, "arlington". take a moment and listen.
http://www.arlingtoncemetery.net/memorial-day-2006-video.htm

Lt.Murphy was a hero. he was my neighbor and yours. he was the kid up the street. he was an american. just like you and me.

never forget those who give, and gave, their lives for this country. mrs. murphy, god bless you and your children.

until next time...

whirlwind tour of the eastern u.s.

i love my job and i love my life. at times, i don't know where i will be the next day. i have the privilege of transporting anybody from young school-aged kids to our military. i go from large cities to cities that are not even on some of the best maps you can buy. i drive on roads 10 lanes wide and i drive on back country roads that require some "creative" maneuvering. this past week, i left on a tuesday about 1730 and drove to chattanooga, about 1 1/2 hours south. i picked up a group that was going to washington, dc. i was relaying them to another driver who was waiting about 2 hours south of dc. the lady who is the tour director, joy, is one of my favorite people. due to her personality and experience, all of her trips are well planned and executed. we left chattanooga about 2030 and arrived in raphine, va. about 0315. from there the other driver would take them the rest of the way. i was going to bed.
about 1100, i left raphine and headed home, about 325 miles south. i got to my office about 1500 and our administrative assistant came outside and said "don't leave, the boss wants to see you". i knew i was in trouble, was going to be fired, and be living under a bridge somewhere!!! when i got in, it was a whirlwind. i was not in trouble, but i was going to chicago and my flight was leaving in just over 3 hours!!! and, rushing home to pack, pick ups kids, eat dinner, take them to their mother and get to the airport. my flight was scheduled to leave at 1940 bound for charlotte, nc. i arrived about 1845, got checked in and went to a lounge beside my departure gate. long story short, my 1940 flight left at 1920!!! never had a flight leave that early. got to charlotte and due to high winds, my flight was almost 2 hours late. after a very turbulent flight, i arrived at o'hare about 0130 and got to my hotel about 0300 and asleep about 0500. i was back up at 1100 and went to mci to get a rental bus. this was a brand new, 2008 mci. 20 minutes later i was going thru a construction zone on i90 and got side-swiped by a RODEWAY (intentional caps, yes i am screaming) bob-tail. he hit my mirror so hard, it flipped around and was touching my windshield. he kept on going. never stopped. surely his mother was a dog or he had no father. it took me over a mile to get over and it took almost 30 minutes to fix the mirror. hat's off to those help trucks that patrol our inner-city interstates who help motorists. i arrived at our shop about 2230 and had 2 trips the next day. one to the airport with an sec football team and then to flat creek, nc. in 2 days, i had covered a lot of ground. knoxville-chattanooga-raphine, va-knoxville-charlotte-chicago-knoxville-flat creek, nc.-knoxville. while all this sounds wild, in reality it is "all in a days work" and i would not trade it for anything!!!
until next time...

young life

"objects in camera viewfinder are smaller than they appear"
sharp top-jasper, ga.


















































for the past 2 weekends, i have had the pleasure of taking 2 young life groups to "camp" for a weekend. when i was in high school, i was in young life. although now, i don't remember that much about it. recall is not what it used to be.
i love young life groups. i very much appreciate the time and energy the counselors put into the lives of our young people. as i posted earlier, our youth are not all bad. i honestly, truly believe if more of our youth were involved (with their hearts) in a young life group, our society would have far fewer problems. anything that takes kids out of their normal, peer-pressure filled lives and deposits good things in their hearts and minds is a good thing.
i don't normally promote websites. i don't normally promote "organizations". very rarely do i endorse all that much. i whole heartedly and without hesitation promote young life. their url is www.younglife.org and there is a lot of info there. copy/pasted from their website "what is young life" is the following:

"Picture a sea of teenage faces in a crowded school hallway. Some kids are trying to blend in; some are being carried along by the crowd; others are deliberately swimming against the tide. All of them are trying to find their way in a culture that is crowded with the noise and glare of media messages and peer expectations.

Young Life seeks to carry the message of Jesus Christ into that tumultuous tide and points teenagers toward life as they were created to live it. Since 1941, the dynamic that has characterized Young Life is its commitment to relationships — Young Life leaders meeting kids on their turf in the interest of friendship. As leaders get to know teenagers, they are able to share the love of Jesus Christ through platforms like Young Life club, Campaigners and trips to camp.

Whether kids are seeking answers or just acceptance, Young Life is there for them, armed with a desire for fun and the ultimate message of hope."

any time spent steering a young person in this direction is time well spent. plant some seeds today. you will see a bountiful harvest for generations to come.

until next time...

the competition

today i have the pleasure to be a part of a 3 bus caravan taking a high school band, color guard and drum line to a regional competition. i have taken these guys before and they are very talented and led by some gifted people. every time i have taken them somewhere, they always win. no, it's not because of me!!! they are consistently that good. their leadership is well qualified to lead. and they do it well.
i was able to take my son with me on this trip. most of my trips he wants to go. because of school, he obviously can't. being a saturday and his interest in music, i felt this would be a good time to show him an option he will have when he enters middle school next year.
when this group travels, it is a fairly large entourage. 3 buses, an equipment truck (mid-size with hydraulic lift), another truck to transport the kawasaki mule, another truck for equipment, and a host of parents and helpers dedicated to making sure all goes smoothly and bring along misc. supplies and needed items. they are well equipped and well prepared. i can not imagine the expense these parents go to. they perform quite a bit so the costs are several thousands of dollars. i took them last year part of the way to orlando. the results they get are well worth the expense.
when i played in my school band, we were lucky to play at football games. we did not compete. now kids perform all over the country. the experience they are getting will go with them for the rest of their lives. i am priveledged to be able to be a small part of this experience and thankful to have the opportunity to watch them receive their rewards.
we hear the news about kids involved in gang activity, drugs and lots of other things. we have become so used to what once was abnormal that we miss the goodness most of our youth display. not every kid is in a gang. not all of them do drugs. because of media we come to believe that if one is, they all are. this is a good group who chose a different path and even if you choose not to see the good, it still exists. you are missing something. these kids always are polite and respectful to me. they greet me with a sincere "hi" and as they get off they actually say "thank you". most of them will tell me they are glad i took them and they hope i take them again. goodness is out there and you may not have to look as hard as you think. take those jaded glasses off and look again. it's not as bad as you think.
until next time...

pics from louisiana to home

sugar cane field in la.
cotton harvest time
dust devil in "loozyanna"

high honor

tuesday i got a call from our general manager. another company needed 2 more drivers for a large troop movement from ft. cambell, ky. to ft. polk, la. for those of you familiar with this blog, you know my gratitude to every soldier for the job they do to keep us safe. being able to transport them would, and is, a high honor for me.
our trip started out with thirty buses picking them up and relaying them to a truckstop in west tennessee. from there me, as well as 30 fresh drivers were to take them the rest of the way, about 550 miles. i got a call from my partner that they would be meeting me in about one hour. so, i waited. after about 2 1/2 hours, i called him back. he told me they had been involved in a wreck and were waiting om law enforcement to finish their investigation. a big truck rear ended one of the buses on the interstate and pushed him into the bus in front . the bus in the middle has some serious damage and was out of service. a new bus was coming and they would soon be on their way. finally, they were released to continue their trip. all this being said, by the time they got to us, we had been waiting almost 4 hours. when they arrived, they had to eat. by the time we loaded, we were pulling out at 4pm. we were supposed to leave at 11am. 2 exits later, the transmission on one of the buses went out. those soldiers were divided and put on the other buses. by the time we got to ft. polk, la. at 345am, we were tired. especially the soldiers. when i was watching them unload their equipment, it occurred to me they not only had all of their equipment but their guns as well. i started talking to one of the leaders on my bus. nice guy. he was picking up the body armour vests and tossing them like it was nothing. as they hit the ground, it sounded like bricks falling. i picked it up and i was amazed at how heavy it was. i asked him and he said it was about 40-45lbs. and, it did not have the side plates in so add another 5-10 pounds. i asked him about their rucksacks and he said they were about 45lbs and their equipment/supply belts were another 10-15lbs. then, their helmets are made of kevlar. add another 5lbs. so, when these guys are training, they are carrying 100-120lbs. my 2 youngest children together don't weigh that much!!! i can not imagine going on a 5-10 mile hike with this stuff but they do. and then, i asked about their weapons. now, i have been raised with guns and have owned at least one since i was about knee high. he explained the features of his rifle and then he handed it to me. add another 5lbs.!!! it was heavy and just by the feel you could tell they had some of the best and most technologically advanced equipment in the world. it was incredible to hold this. as i got lost in the moment, i looked him in the eye to thank him for taking the time to show me this stuff. i was blind sided by the reality that of the 44 guys on my bus, some may not make it back from their next deployment. these were guys that could be our neighbors, our sons, daughters, or kids that grew up with my kids. the sting of reality brings a soberness that leads to the fact that these guys do what they do for me. and you. and this great country. they did it by choice. they chose to do all of this so i can breathe free air. they could be married, going to college or a host of other things. they chose to do this for me and you. next time you see a soldier, thank him for a job well done. you may not agree but he is fighting for you to maintain your right of voice. they fight so someone will not take that away. Sgt., thanks.
until next time...

waiting on a phone call

i am bored. it is hard to believe that i have not driven in almost 2 weeks. i love my children and i am so happy to spend some time with them. their mom is in florida so i am mr. dad and mr. mom. no complaints about that. i wish i had them all here so we could have 4 way arguments instead of 2 ways!!!
as i sit here, i am bored. i have lots to do. it is easy to put doing things off. after all, the phone might ring anytime, right? but i can't leave. i can justify putting off the things i should be doing to make room for the things i may not end up doing. makes perfect sense doesn't it?
my time off is good and deep inside i know it. i need the break from the road because i know my perspective will change when i get my next assignment and get behind the wheel.
funny how things change in life. for most of our lives we dread going to work. we enjoy all the fruits of our labors. i like to eat. i like to play. work has only provided the means to do what i wanted to do. this is different. i love what i do. i love trips and every one is different. the people are different. it is not boring at all. i feast on being around other people and i guess that is why i love doing what i do.
i have been considering some life and career changes and i am stuck moving forward. i have seen a lot of geese lately so i know that no matter the direction i will be okay. sometimes god does not move fast enough for me and i get impatient. when i do i make bad decisions and suffer the consequences. i have enough maturity now to know that even waiting is progress in motion. i can't see it but i trust. god may not move fast enough for me but i know his timing is perfect and mine is always late or early. so, i wait.

until next time...

is this what we are leaving to our children?

i wanted to think "not in my state" when i heard about this on fox news tonight. today a judge said the lethal injection violated the inmates eight amendment protections. i copied and pasted this so don't think i am changing my protocol. i would not go to the trouble. i read this on a tv station website and included are the comments i posted there. am i alone in this?

"U.S. District Judge Aleta Trauger said the protocol "presents a substantial risk of unnecessary pain." She said it violates death row inmate Edward Jerome Harbison's Eighth Amendment protections against cruel and unusual punishment."

this is the dumbest thing i have ever heard. to think we should be sensitive to him suffering before he dies? i don't care if he cries like a school girl. i hope his pain is excruciating, long and graphic. and then the judge added;

"the new protocol does not ensure that inmates are properly anesthetized before the lethal injection is administered". i wondered if the judge saw crime scene photos of his victim. did the killer check to see if she was "properly anesthetized" before he beat her to death?

"Harbison was scheduled to be executed early next Wednesday for beating an elderly woman to death during a burglary in 1983."

beating death? do people really know how hard it is to beat someone to death? the pain and suffering they feel?

if we allow idiots like this continue to stay on the bench then we can no longer question decisions like this that are made. when will we rise up as a civilized society and say no more? the more i read stuff like this, the more i believe in bernard goetz and vigilante justice. i say we turn this murderer loose. when vigilante's get finished with him the lethal injection might not look so "cruel and unusual".

god help us all.

there may not be a next time...

season stats

as i mentioned earlier, i would post some statistics from my road trips this year. these are baseball road trips only.

15 ROAD TRIPS

14,876 MILES

92 DAYS ON THE ROAD

16 PLAYERS PROMOTED TO EITHER “AAA” OR MAJORS

SEASON START (ON THE ROAD) 04/04/2007

LAST ROAD GAME (PLAYOFFS) 09/10/2007

my time with these players was one of the most memorable of my life. i am very grateful for the experiences. i hope when the season starts in '08, i will again have the opportunity.

this blog is not just about baseball as you can see. a lot of my trips i do not post about. i will try to do better in the future to chronicle my travels and add photos as i can or deem appropriate. chances are, if you are reading this you know who i am or at least who i drive for. i will not volunteer this information as i know this is available to anyone worldwide. i do not use names or specifics for obvious reasons and never will.
until next time...

master yoda was there for the playoffs

my life is not a boring life. life on the road is not boring. combine my life and life on the road and it really is quite interesting.
over the last 5 months with a minor league baseball team, i have seen and experienced a lifetime of oddities-some sad and some absolutely hilarious. this is one of the latter.
i was backing my coach into my designated parking spot just outside the gates of joe evans field (a/k/a/ "the joe"). i noticed a honda accord parked on the street with a passenger in the front seat. all i could see was a stick due to sun glare. the coach i had brought the guys down in was our flagship. 2 9' couches, in-motion satellite tv, radio and wi-fi. coffeemaker with 2 beverage dispensers as well as refrigerator, ice chest and microwave. seats trimmed in leather and also an inverter for ac power. it is a cream puff. anyway, i am sitting on the coach watching fox news and the passenger has not moved. kinda odd i thought. i dozed off (actually rem) and when i woke up he was still there. this had been well over an hour and i was quite concerned at this motionless figure in a car on a fairly warm day. becoming curious, i walked up to the car and here is what i saw!!!

until next time...

the playoffs

we made the playoffs!!! it has been a wild ride but we made the league playoffs. as i write this, hang with me.
it started in raleigh when we won and got the "wild card" in the playoffs. it was a big deal. we started the season with a great team. we lost almost all of our original team as well as some that were sent up from "a" ball. just estimating, i can recall at least 10 players who were promoted to "aaa" and 6 who went to the majors. not too bad. i don't know of any other team who sent that many players on. i remember in one day, 6 trades were made. i remember taking my son to a home game and him asking me who were those guys wearing our team uniforms. so many new faces. and, we kept winning!!!
we went to huntsville for 2 games.we won the first game and lost the second. we came home for the third game and won and lead the best of five series 2-1. we went back to huntsville and lost games 4 and five. i thought the trip back home would be hard but these guys being professionals, knew it was "just baseball" and that was the way it went. it was hard loading the bus for the last time. earlier in the day, i sttod in the dugout with any eerie feeling that this was going to be over. i was not ready. i spent a lot of time with these guys and they had become like family to me. i stood looking at the field for a good 30 minutes taking in all i could. the smells, the gentle breeze as i felt it on my face, the sounds of people filing into the stadium and the Star Spangled Banner being sung for the last time. this was harder than i imagined but i knew tonight was do or die.
after the game and as the players came out with their equipment bags, i shook everyones hand and to my surprise, the all hugged me and thanked me!!! they thanked me!!! i was the one who started out thanking them for some lifelong memories and ended up with them thanking me. i was moved beyond words. i started off as "just the bus driver" and according to the coach, i became "team". thinking ahead to next year, i look forward to seeing how these guys will mature and get better. seeing their careers change and their personal lives continue to develop. get married and have children. and i know some will not change beyond time distance.
i am compiling some stats that i have kept thru out the year. when i am finished i will be posting them here as well as my year end recap.
as for me, i am looking forward to seeing my family more often. as much as i loved these players
my own children will always come first. i look forward to seeing my 4 children and creating some lifelong memories of our time together. i missed them everyday and i want them all here with me now. school has started and in time i will.
until next time...

pics from flagstaff to amarillo trip

sunrise over elk city, ok.
double rainbows somewhere around arizona/new mexico line.
straight and flat i-40 with a storm ahead.
flat land all around and then this. kinda like combining the hills of east tennessee and the plains of the mid-west.
flagstaff, az.

pics from mobile trip

one more view from my room at "hotel crappy" in mobile, al. uss alabama can be seen behind the silos.
this is what one of my therapy sessions looks like!!! orange beach, al. had a day off and took a few of the "guys" to the beach. baby jellyfish by the thousands were washing upon the beach. wasn't sure if they could sting as they were about fingernail size. was not going to take a chance. had one get inside my bathing suit 2 years ago and just had a big time on the inside of my right thigh!!!
photo from my hotel room in mobile. this is a wide angle shot of the "holiday" cruise ship that greeted me wednesday morning. by late this afternoon, it had reloaded and was back out going to cozumel.
one of the views looking out of my hotel room. mobile, al.

the slave trade was just wrong

i am in mobile alabama. for several days when i go to “warm-up” the coach, the temperature has been 120-127 inside. it takes a long time for a vehicle that size to cool down.

it has been a wild 6 days here. the riverfront plaza has been the most inhospitable hotel i have ever stayed in. to spend over $200 per night here i would have expected more accommodating service. buses are obviously not wanted here. only mercedes suv’s and other luxury vehicles get the “star” treatment here. however the views of mobile bay and the river are spectacular. seeing the big freighters up close is really cool.

recently I read where london has acknowledged their part in the slave trade. while a good step in the right direction it was wrong to begin with. i have been thinking about how hot it is here. it has been consistently over 100 everyday. as i watched a ship pulling out, i saw it’s registry was singapore. i don’t know how long it takes to get there from here. i could google it and find out. if i had wireless internet but i don’t. crappy hotel.

anyway with the news from london, i began to wonder how long it would take a slave ship from london to get here in the 1700’s or 1800’s. keep in mind they were not air-conditioned. some accounts i read said it often took months to make the crossing. these people were chained and stacked like cord wood. to some it was just another commodity. these were real, live human beings who felt pain and emotions just like you and i. their lives were to make the lives of the owners better and more profitable. if they “bred” and had children then it was good. if they died, too bad. Next ship was coming soon with fresh “commodities”.

so, here we are in 2007. we pushed it under the rug and have tried to make the problem go away but it won’t. i hope that one day when we enter the pearly gates we not only come face to face with our creator, but that those who participated in the slave trade will have the chance to see all the lives and families ruined by their actions and greed. i believe in the power of forgiveness. i hope to witness some of this reparation.

this black eye on civilization will never heal. however, we must move on in order to be stronger. words escape me as i try to close this and sort thru my own views. forgive me if my closing is brief but what more can i say?

until next time…

i did not want to know his name

today started off by dropping off my youngest 2 with their grandfather. their mom is in atlanta and i am going to flagstaff. as i was leaving my home airport, there was a young (3-4?) girl in front of me going thru security. she was pushing her baby doll stroller and looking very grownup and assured. she was wearing a teal blue sequined dress and was traveling with her mom and dad. her hair looked like a newborns hair-very thin and very short. as i watched her it was obvious she had been thru chemotherapy and was just starting to grow back. i flashed back to my brother going thru his chemo and heartbroken he was when he would see the kids at m.d. anderson in houston going in for their treatments. he was stage 4 (terminal) and instead of focusing on his own mortality, he was feeling the pain of someone he did not even know. now i know some of how he was feeling. after boarding in charlotte, there were about 25 servicemen on this flight. having flown alot, seeing them is not uncommon.
after a weird series of events, 2 ended up sitting beside me. one of them i had seen earlier. nice looking guy, mid 20's and had that military confident aire about him. he and the other soldier started talking and soon he spoke to me.
he was very talkative and we talked about alot of things. he had just completed basic training, was 25 and had been a bartender. he was from baltimore. he turned to the other guy and started asking him about his outfit. i had turned on my computer and my wallpaper is a copy of the "lee teter" print he did for the vietnam veterans. it is haunting. in a split second
it occured to me that i was supposed to pray for him and the others and i had images of Arlington come to me. i tried to push past all this and then he did it-he introduced himself to the other soldier. his name was robert reynolds. i did not want to know this. i have a habit of meeting people and forming a bond with them. now i knew i had to pray. i felt that if i did not, i would find his name on a stone at Arlington and i knew i would lose it right there.
so, i prayed for him. i prayed for the others. i prayed for our military leadership. i prayed for the president. there was a guy sitting in 1st class who bought sandwiches for all the guys in uniform. i wished i could have. there are times i get angry that i can't do more for other people. i would love to be so filthy rich that i could donate almost all of it to make peoples lives better. i wished i could go with them. they know that one day soon they will be in iraq and their world will be forever changed.
today has been one of those days that takes me out of my own little world. i like my own little world. it centers around God/Church, my children, and driving my coach. my own little world is comfortable and i really like it there. god takes me out of there and shows me things i otherwise would have missed. he wants me to see more than my world. these guys on my flight today stepped "out of their worlds" by choice to do an honorable thing for you, me, this country and all of mankind. when i step back and take it in, praying is not only the least thing i can do for these guys, it is the most powerful thing i can do. you can be a powerful force for these courageous men and women. this war on terrorism will probably never be "won". but i truly believe fervent prayer can change any course set out by man no matter hell bent he is to destroy. so pray. and pray hard. pray without ceasing. as the t-shirt says "pray hard". our country, our world and these guys depend on it.
until next time...

oops, God did it again

lately, some pieces of the life puzzle have surfaced. i have been observant enough to notice that when is God is working in me, i see him in some rather abstract ways. i have mentioned this in an earlier post titled "God is a goose". well, for some time i have not seen God at work and these abstracts have not been there. i know He is always there no matter where or what. sometimes obvious, sometimes in stealth mode. yesterday the engine in my van started giving me problems and i know it's life is almost over. as i was driving past a large cemetery on the way to church, a flock of geese were right on the side of the road. after seeing this, i knew God was reminding me that he is still there and whatever else i face, it will be OK. tonight, on the way to church, my kids got into a food fight in the car. i grabbed the plate of mac and cheese from my 9 year old and dumped it in my lap. as i sat there about to explode, i was driving past the same cemetery and the geese were back. it was a hard family moment and God's timing is always perfect. i did not explode but rather felt peace. i needed God right then, that split second and he knew it. i needed him and as always, he was there. if i analyze this too much, i would wonder the significance of the geese being by a cemetery and start to think somebody close to me may die soon. i don't know if this will happen. maybe it is me. i just don't know. i do know this-whatever does happen He will be there with me. i trust and believe and yes, it is that simple.
until next time...

sean hannity freedom concert

i am a member of the "religious" right. i am also part of the moral majority, the christian right, born again, right wing zealot and a host of other things. i believe in god who is the creator of all. i also believe that you have the freedom to worship as you choose. after all, we are given the right of "freedom of religion". i support our military and our president. i think you get the idea.
a few days ago i was chosen to take a local radio station "staff" to atlanta for the evening. when i arrived to pick them up and it turns out i was taking them to a sean hannity freedom concert. needless to say, i was in right wing heaven!!! traffic across atlanta took us nearly 3 hours so when we arrived, we had already missed about 30 minutes of it. i missed lee greenwood and heard i missed fred thompson, my choice to run for president. i did get to see charlie daniels (he has definitely gotten better with age), newt gingrich, larry the cable guy, ron white, col. oliver north (awesome) montgomery gentry and if i left anybody out i apologize. it was 3 hours of incredible experiences.
i have written in previous posts about how i appreciate all our militaries have done and continue to do for us every second of every day. i guess that is why i jump at the chance to go to washington (Arlington Cemetery, Vietnam Memorial, Iwo Jima, etc.). this concert series is an incredible experience and anyone who is a red, white and blue fan needs to go. it is uplifting and emotional. the work that sean hannity, oliver north and countless others are doing deserves recognition. i proudly offer this link and urge you to go to it now. www.hannity.com. copy and paste in your browser address bar and happy surfing. also try www.freedomalliance.org. the only comment further to make is "GOD BLESS AMERICA" and all those who sacrifice to keep us free!!!
until next time...

July 4th, the security dude, and the family who got it right

i had spoken to him on several occasions at the game. "jeff" was a security dude. he was tall, had short blond hair and was leanly built. we joked about several things. as the game went on, i noticed him interacting with various people in the crowd. most of them were wearing their red, white and blue. he and i started talking on the concourse and some of his parents friends came up. we all were talking when the woman asked how one of their friends was doing better. turns out they were referring to one of his buddies who did a year in iraq with him. he had been affected emotionally and was having a hard time dealing with all he had witnessed. we will never know all these brave men and women in our militaries do for their country. he told about raids and some of the people he interacted with. one day they would be outside the base selling cd's and the next day they would have body bombs strapped on trying to kill you and everybody they could. he got back in december '06 and said he would gladly go back if called. my first reaction was "why" but deep inside i knew why. after a while, i offered my hand, shook his and thanked him for all he did for us. in a soft, low key way he said "you're welcome".
at this game there were several bus loads of soldiers. after the game, they all lined up outside the gates to get on their buses. sergeants would bark orders and they would trot single file to their bus and get on. after they loaded all the buses, they started to drive off. as they drove off, i noticed on family of 5-6 who were standing there clapping as they went by. they were the only ones out of over 10,000 people to honor these men and women this way. it is something we should do every time we see on of them. i was moved to witness this 30 second event. i thanked God i live in America. despite all of our differences and challenges that face us, this is still the best place on earth to live and breathe free air. thank God!!!
until next time...

huntsville hard

this morning we left for huntsville for a 4 game series. i had not thought that much about the connection. my brother lived in huntsville for several years before finally moving to houston to work at the johnson space center. i was sitting in the stands and a wave of emotion came over me. i almost lost it. as i watched the traffic on memorial parkway (fitting isn't it), i wondered how many times he had driven it. had he ever been to a baseball game here? how far from here did he he live? if you are reading this i am referring my only brother who died of cancer 7 years ago. i have written about this in earlier posts.
as i sat there it occured to me that i never really grieved his death. at the time, my ex-wife and i were starting to divorce and that in itself was tough. then his death was something i "dealt with". my parents were so hurt at that time and i knew i had to be strong for them. my sister-in-law was a psychotic bitch (sorry 'bout that one) and the whole after death was horrible. i believe his death was one of the factors in my fathers passing 2 years later. still, i see i need to grieve. i am here for 3 more days so i will be able to process some emotions and carry them home with me. i am hurting and i do not know what to do in order to grieve. all i know is, i am hurting and was blindsided by all of this.
i know that some people resort to sex. some it is drugs and alcohol. for others it is over eating. i don't know how i will move thru this, i just know i will.
until next time...

lightning in raleigh

i have a deep respect for the fury of "mother nature". i have been known to stand and watch lightning storms and not just admire but appreciate one of natures wonders. never have i been close enough to be harmed by a tornado. i have been on the gulf coast and been in a tropical depression and a storm. i love being around things such as violent storms. i have driven by bus in ohio with wind strong enough to rip whole corn stalks out of the ground and have them pummel the side of the coach and blow other vehicles off the road. my 8 year old (9 in a week) is terrified of a rain storm.
wednesday night a lightning storm came while i was sitting in the dugout. it came up fast and there was almost no rain. after about 10 minutes i could tell the storm was right on top of us. i also realized i am sitting in a concrete like bunker with tons of steel over me. about that time i heard the loudest crack i have ever heard and felt the hair on my arms stand. i yelled at one of the groundskeepers if we had taken a direct hit. he replied "yep" and never really batted an eye. it got my attention. turns out it struck a lightpole about 100 feet away. thinking it was soon to pass, i sat there "appreciating" nature. then i heard another loud crack that seemed to last about 15 seconds. i yelled "another one?" and he said "yep". i asked where and he indicated another lightpole. this one was about 50 feet away. i decided it was time to go to the clubhouse not thinking about it's metal roof.
it took me back to several years ago, sometime in the mid 1980's. i had a neighbor who was playing golf with his uncle and 2 other family members. the got caught in a thunderstorm and not only was he struck and killed by lightning, his uncle and another were too. the 4th one suffers permanent damage. i remember the day after his funeral his wife got notification he had passed his cpa exam. so much of his life was ahead of him. but isn't that true with most tradegies?
as i thought about mike it occured to me that as i am know older and others depend on me that maybe it is time to stop being such a risk taker and settle down and be more cautious. i still have small children who depend on me. the people i drive for depend on me. and i depend on me too because i still am trying to find god's purpose for me on a daily basis. i also remember helen keller's words "life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all". well, i guess the decision is obvious. i still want to god's will but who says i can't enjoy the ride. who knows, the next ride may be the best yet!!!
until next time...

a funny thing happened on the way to the gym

"why does bottled water have an expiration date" was the question posed to me by one of the players as he was getting on the bus to go to the gym. i said "it must be marketing". the strength coach said he thought it was the plastic. i told them i knew ice had an expiration date on it and the way i remembered was after hurricane katrina fema trucked in truckloads of ice that went bad and had to be thrown out. then i remembered the civil defense used to store barrels of water and crackers and i don't remember an expiration date on them. when i mentioned the civil defense, several players asked what that was. i tried to explain but i could not find the words nor do i know if the civil defense still exists. i need to google that one. i asked the original player who brought up the subject how old he was. when he answered "24" then i knew why he and the others had never heard of the civil defense and what they were about. then, reality hit as i realized i am old enough to be these guys father!!!
i am in the process of altering my lifestyle. i broke my ankle in may of last year and except for 1 stint on the treadmill, i had not worked out since. i have a total gym xl at home and it is an incredible piece of equipment. prior to my ankle accident, i was on it at least 4 times per week. it felt good to workout and i missed it. for a while. after several weeks turning into months, it becomes a very expensive dust collector. it is in the same spot where i left it.
so, i am back in the gym with a group of professional athletes and watching them and what they do, i know i will never be able to do what they can do. youth is on their side. age and gravity are on mine and i am losing. point is, sometimes in life we see ourselves as we were and not as we are. i joke with several of the players about switching clothes so i can play in their place. i know i can't do what they do. what i can do is get them from point "a" to point "b" as safely as possible. it is still a thrill to do what i do. it is also a thrill to be with these players and live thru them. i have my own function here and i will do it to the best of my ability just as they do theirs to the best of their ability.
by the way, why does bottled water have an expiration date?
until next time...

body piercing saved my life

he was standing in front of me waiting to get ice cream when i noticed in bold letters what was on the back of his shirt. it plainly said "body piercing saved my life". he turned to say something to one of his children and i noted that he appeared to be in his 50's, maybe 60's. he did not look like the typical "piercer" and so i looked closer at his shirt and then i noticed the nails and the faint image of Christ and then i fully understood what it meant. while a little whimsical, it is a bold statement to his faith. sometimes i am amazed at what Christians believe. it is more amazing what they do not believe and that is all that Christ did for me and you. while waiting for the players to get on the bus, one of the players interrupted his phone call to show me the new book he was reading. it is entitled "i don't have enough faith to be an atheist". he told me it was a "deep thinkers" book which may exclude me from reading it. keep in mind this player is the same one referenced in one of my jacksonville posts. he was the one who asked me about going to church Easter morning. once again, the spirit is moving and i am puzzled with these 2 events. wherever this leads, i can say with confidence that the spirit is moving. i strongly believe there are no coincidences in life. all of our days are well planned by our creator. so, what happens next i will keep you posted. yesterday, i went to the vitamin store and as i entered, one of the employees said, "today is the day that the lord has made" and as i started to finish, three of us in unison said "and i will rejoice and be glad in it". turned out they were ordained and had been on mission trips lately. after we talked, i realized how much i had been blessed by their words. living on the road as i do, i get hungry and thirsty for the word. and always, without fail, god shows me he is still there with me. his timing is precise and he is never late. it is with a grateful heart i too can boldly say "body piercing saved my life".
until next time...

back in d.c.

got a call yesterday (thursday) from our dispatcher. one of our coaches (the same one i take the team on road trips in) had blown the turbo and they wanted to know if i would take our newest coach up to washington and when the repairs are made on the other one, bring it home. i had my son with me at the time so i had to call his mother and make sure it was ok. we packed and headed out the door and within a few hours we were on our way.

this was my 4^th trip to washington this year. in earlier posts, i have mentioned my love for the washington area. it was and still is, my dream to take all of my children (4) up there for a week and show them the area. i was excited as was my son. i had told him many times before how badly i wanted to take them and he was as excited as i have seen any kid. only problem was as soon as the repairs were made we were to head back home. after several phone calls, the owner told me i had to take my son to d.c. for a day so he could see it. When your boss tells you something like this, you do it. i am very thankful to be working for a very family oriented boss.

with blessings from the boss, all i needed was the coach as by now the other driver had picked up the one i came up in. mid afternoon friday, the shop called and said the coach had been repaired and ready to be picked up. i called a cab, picked up the coach and we were headed to d.c.!!!

let me back up. we stayed in manassas, va. which is about 30 minutes from d.c. the whole trip from manassas to d.c. was “wide eyed wonder” and i was so happy to be able to do this. we started off with the white house, went to the capital, jefferson memorial, washington monument, and drove by countless others. we were trying to figure out what to do about dinner so we ended up at union station. we stayed in dc about 4 hours decided we would have to come back tomorrow and do it again.

the next day, there was some special event on the mall so we went to the lincoln, drove around some more and finally ended up at Arlington National Cemetery. we walked around for a while and went to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. we got there about 10 minutes before the changing of the guard and we decided to stay for that. watching to changing is very impressive and i could tell my son was too. as we were leaving, he attempted his best “heel clicks” like they do and i felt a warmth rush thru me. it was a moment in time that you know will be remembered for a lifetime. i knew this trip left had impressions on a young mind.

after this, we both knew it was time to go home. i was sad and began to feel my eyes “sweat”. Arlington always does that to me. i am so grateful for what these men and women did for me and this great country. as we walked, for the most part it was silence. in the words of a series of commercials, this moment was “priceless”.

until next time…

ollie ollie raleigh

yeah, i know. kinda goofy for a blog entry. sometimes while driving, i (or my mind) play word games. being ADD, it just sorta happens. for some reason, i got to thinking about childhood games and for some reason, “red rover” popped in my mind. i had a real red rover (you know, the SUV) pass me and i thought the whole thing was kinda cool. makes me want one with a vanity plate. anyway, remember the game? “red rover, red rover send (insert a friend’s name here)”. and then we would join arms and whoever we called would come running and try to break our arm-in-arm grip. but there was some other game and i can’t remember much about it except for “ollie ollie oxen”. anybody out there, please let me know.

this series was our worst road trip this year. we went 1-4 against a team in last place in their division. as a matter of fact, they had a 9 game losing streak until we arrived. we won’t discuss this series much further except to say our next road trip is a 6 game series against the same team so stay tuned. we leave in 10 days!!!

overall, this trip was odd. losing 4 games, i put some scratches on the coach just after it got repaired/painted from where another driver scraped a retaining wall at dollywood. we had a 27 mile shuttle to the ballpark one way which means with 3 trips daily, i was doing a lot of driving. most road trips, it is 1-3 miles from hotel to park. gives me something to look forward to!!

at this writing, we are still 4 games above .500 so overall we are not doing too badly. i still believe in these guys and i am confident most will go on in their careers and achieve great things. they are talented and well coached. they have always treated me with respect and courtesy and never been rowdy on the trips. i can’t say enough good things about these players.

until next time…

jackson tennessee

jackson is my home town. i was born here in 1956 to 2 wonderful parents. as i have said earlier, i had “ward and june cleaver” for parents. i moved from here in 1979 and have called another part of the state home since then. this time was different. i was driving a 57 passenger motor coach back to my hometown along with my 9 year old son and the baseball team.

my mom still lives here and will be 82 this year. she lives alone in the house i grew up in. she is independent and i know she gets lonely. most all of the friends she and daddy had are gone. my schedule sometimes does not give me sufficient time to get back to see her as often as i need to.

coming back with my son and the team was kinda odd. occasionally when i come home i run into someone i grew up with. i was hoping to see some old friends at the park but that never happened. i love baseball. i love my family. combining the 2 is nirvana. i wish i had all my children with me. having 3 daughters around those players would not have been good. this is a great bunch of guys. putting them around my daughters is something else altogether.

anyway, it was a great series. we went 3-2.

i did get the opportunity to go to the cemetery to visit my father, brother, nephew and grandmother. my nephew died long ago as did my grandmother. my nephew was only 6 weeks old when he died. my grandmother was 83. my brother was 54 and my dad was 81. i miss my brother and my dad. my brother was every young kid’s dream of a big brother. at the time of his death from renal cell carcinoma, he was one of the managers in charge of research and design for the international space station. kinda cool for a job. his friends were astronauts. as a matter of fact at his funeral, jim buchley spoke. i forget how many shuttle missions he went on. i do know at one time he held the record for the most number of space walks and time spent spacewalking. needless to say, i have some really cool souvenirs.

of all the people in my life, i miss my dad the most. i guess that now, i am really starting to grieve his passing. i still feel some sting as i wish for just one more phone call, or one more of his “hey son” when i would see him. i can still see his face light up when i would see him. i also remember seeing him break down and cry when i would leave. just like i am doing as i recall all of this.

until next time…

Down in Mississippi And Up To No Good

that is a song by jennifer nettles and sugarland. it is a neat song and fits well with what i am about to write. the date on this blog is not correct. this event took place may 19th or so.
we had an early game against mississippi and some of the guys looked like they needed a diversion. i suggested going to a casino in vicksburg which was about 45 minutes away. about 15 said "if you're going to a casino, i'm there" so i had quite a few that wanted to go. i got permission to take them away for the night. only 1 showed up to actually go.
so off we went for the 2 hour drive that was only supposed to take 45 minutes. a big truck jack-knifed and the interstate was shut down. being on a bus, we had about all we needed to sit and wait. bathroom, drinks (non-alcoholic of course) and room to stand up in an air conditioned environment. i felt sorry for those other people who had to shut their cars down and sit in the heat. i truly did.
after we arrived, he was going to show me all about "craps". after about an hour, he lost about $200. i like his philosophy about gambling. to him it was entertainment. he compared it to going out on the town for a night. dinner at a nice restaurant, a movie or play, and then dessert somewhere. figure out how much you are willing to play for that nights entertainment and that is what you go in with, if you spend it all, it's time to go home.
i had about $40 with me so i started playing blackjack. at a $5 table. after about an hour and a half, i was up $300. he was still at the Craps table and i was having fun. he came over and we stayed another 2 hours and i was still up $200. he went back to the craps table and came back about 15 minutes later broke. i gave him a $5 chip and he started playing blackjack and went up about $200. he went back to the craps table and lost again. it was time to go and i was still up $150. he decided on one more roll at the table so i went back to the blackjack table and won another $100. it was definitely time to go.
i can see where people get addicted to gambling. it would be so easy. keep in mind my friends philosophy. it is entertainment and that is what makes it fun. learn when to walk away.
until next time...

Why Me?

God sometimes really puzzles me. for quite some time now i have been directing my church's video production. i love it. i love serving and this is a perfect fit for me. i try very hard to make it with some zip and give it some unique touches.
last sunday, or music and media minster said to me " i really need someone to take this ministry and run with it" and that was all he had to say. since then God has been working on me and i know this is a great opportunity for me. God does that to people. a seed gets planted and you never know who will step up. i did. i called and emailed him to tell him i would like to be the one. wish me luck.
until next time...

Pearl Mississippi

it's been about a week since the last post so this may be long. then again, it may not. we ended up 2-3 in alabama and now we are on a 5 game series and we dropped tonight's game. gosh, these guys looked good.
when we were loading the bus, a hard rain came so i had some time to just sit and see some of the players with their families. most of the time, we are on the way somewhere or we are already there before or after a game. so, it's them and me. most of these guys are in their early 20's and are still "kids" except for the staff who are all well seasoned, mature men. some have played in the majors. to watch these guys with their wives and kids was very touching. i say goodbye to my children and hug them goodbye. i squeeze them hard when i get back home. same with them i found their soft spots and theirs are the same as mine-their families. it is kinda neat to see their kids (and for some their dogs but that is another blog) mix with the other players. i saw one kid run up to another player and jump into his arms. i don't know who got the most out of that exchange. i believe i did though.
on a sad note, 2 players did not get to come with us. they got "sent down" to "a" ball and i was sad that they were not coming. one in particular. saying goodbye to one of them for some reason bothered me. i shook hands with one of them as he got out of the shower. i have never shook hands with a naked man before. we needed to get on down the road. as i shook his hand, i said " i have never shaken a naked mans hand. he laughed and i told him i was going to miss him. he used to rub my head for "good luck" as he would get off the bus for a game. reminds me of one of my previous blogs about luck. hey. if it works. then again, it didn't appear to help him much.
until next time...

Catch Up Time

it is wednesday night in montgomery and we won after 2 losses. i have never been around these guys when the have lost 2 in a row. it was hard. as far as a road trip goes, it is a success so far. their record is 5-3 and we have 2 games to go. even if we lose the next 2 games and go home 5-5 it is still a good road trip. i don't think we will lose the next 2.
montgomery is a beautiful area. the homes in the downtown area are beautiful. the "first white house of the confederacy" is magnificent as well as the state capital building. i am going to find out how to add photos to this blog so you can see some of what i write about. the moss growing in the trees still amazes me but late at night is kinda spooky. for those of you who are history buffs this place is one to see. interesting contrast and similarities with washington. down here they still wave the confederate, or rebel flag. no comments either way from me although it is still a part of our history and heritage. admire it for what it is. i don't see the hate associated it as some seem to claim. but, then again, i am not african-american either.
this sunday is mother's day. i am thankful mine is still living. she is 82 years old. she is independant, lives alone, still drives and does not take medicine like other "seniors" do. i wish i could be with her but my schedule will not permit it. i am planning a trip to see her the last week of this month and will stay for a week. we have a 5 game series in the town she lives in and my 9 year old is going to go with me. it will be a great trip and i am looking forward to it. anytime i can see my mom, baseball, and have some of my kids with me is high on my list of having a good time.
until next time...

I Miss My Dad

i miss my dad. he was a really neat guy. never met a stranger. he always had a nod or a word for most everybody he came in contact with. i guess that is where i get my core personality from.
dad died 4 years ago. he was 81 and up until 2 weeks before he dies, he was in good health to be his age. only 5 bypasses 10 years earlier and he lost a leg to an infection in his toe. minor diabetic too. he was not on insulin. he complained of his back and neck hurting and for him to complain, you knew he was in pain. mother took him to the doctor twice and even took him to the hospital which is a 5 minute drive. mid afternoon, march 17th, mother heard a loud noise and my father was motionless on the floor. he had tripped on his walker as he had not put his prosthesis on. she tried to roll him over and he was unconscious. she called 911 and they stayed on the phone until the paramedics got there. being so close to the hospital they were there within a few minutes. after the paramedics got there, they called for the advanced life support team. it took quite some time for them to stabilize him. one of the paramedics told my mother he was paralyzed before they put him on the gurney.
the loaded him in the ambulance and while they were working on him, my mother called me. i remember i was at work and when she called me, my knees buckled and i went to the floor. within 30 minutes of her call, i had gone home, packed my car and was on the road for the 5 hour drive. her call shook me so bad. i could tell she was so scared and hurting.
i got there about 9pm that night and he died 5 minutes into our 6pm icu visit the next day. i got to see him for about 5 minutes when i first arrived. i was walking down a hallway, lost, and just so happened they wheeled him by on the way to icu. i told him i loved him. that was the last time he was able to hear me.
tests showed when he fell, he broke his neck in 2 places. immediately he was in pain no longer. when his heart stopped, the team asked if he was dnr. i said i thought so. ultimately, i had to make the decision for them to stop. my mom was hurting so bad. her lifelong friend is dead. 2 years earlier, my brother died from renal cell carcinoma. in between, she had lost her sister. it had been a hard 3 years for her.
i say all this to say this: when i dropped the players off today at the gym, one of them was delayed getting off the bus. he seems to be a pretty well grounded guy. after about 5 minutes he got off the bus apologizing for the delay. he said he was talking to his dad and was apparently getting some advice. i told him no problem as i thought i sure wish i could talk to mine.
if your dad is still living, take a moment to call him if just to say hi. you never know if this may be your last chance.
until next time...

Just Another Road Win/Feelings

okay, we won. big deal? yes it is!!! anytime you win on the road, it is a good thing and yes, a big deal.
we left yesterday and it was a beautiful day to be on the road. sunny, mid 80's. it was a beautiful night for baseball. the team we are playing has a better record than us. we also had 3 or 4 players be "sent up" so that was great for them and their careers. now we have some new faces and to watch them come in and contribute like they did shows the professionalism they already have. in hanging around ballparks, i see a lot of people. most are very nice and share the same passion for baseball that i do. some look like the people your parents warned you about when growing up. the guys i am around have always been very respectful and i could not ask for better working relationships. i can't say enough good things about them. when we visit other parks and i see some of the other players and their attitudes, i know i am blessed (started to say lucky. see previous blog about luck).
while at the game last night, my 8 year old called me crying and told me she wanted me to come home and be with her. it rips your heart out when your kids do this. especially when it is day 1 of a 10 day trip. as i talked to her trying to calm her down and tell her how much i wanted to be with her and i loved her, it occurred to me she was in trouble with her mother!!! she was telling me about a house in their neighborhood for sale and she wanted me to buy it so she and her brother could ride their bicycles to see me. i knew then she was in deep trouble. and hurting.
as i think about her trying to express to me what she was really feeling, don't we as adults do the same thing? we are feeling something we can't, or won't, express so it comes out it a way that is different. we get mad at loved ones or friends over something small when that was not the root. as someone told me, "tell me what you think and i am not much help. tell me what you are feeling and i will do all i can to help". kids, as well as adults communicate much the same. sometimes we don't want to know what others are feeling. if we truly care, we will take the time to find out.
until next time...

Is It Just Me Or What?

well, i am not vain enough to believe anything in this world is about me nor is my ego that large. my baseball team has dropped 5 or 6 games since i went to washington. the 2 games i went to before i left they won. tomorrow we are back on the road for 11 days. 5 games in birmingham and 5 games in montgomery then we return. when i am with them, they win.
my 8 year old had a softball game tonight. while she did not hit a home run, she got on base 3 times and scored twice. they won 14-10. they won last night also. coincidence? probably.
so what is it that brings us "good luck" or is their such a thing as luck? i don't believe in it good or bad. i do believe that there are things or people that make us feel better about ourselves and we find strength from that feeling. but when it comes down to it, it is the ability within us that makes us win or at least go that little extra and most times that is the difference. i am glad that i am not the instrument that brings luck, good or bad. i don't want that burden. i do try to to be an encourager and as a friend once said, "i'm just trying to be a blessing" and i like that philosophy.
life is to short to be around people that put us down or make us feel bad.
recently my son had an incident that left him feeling bad about himself. children can be so cruel to other children. not knowing how to express it, it came out inappropriately. i was talking to him about (actually probing which is a nice word for interrogation) and it finally hit me it was becoming a self image issue. if you are around enough bad influence we begin to believe what others are telling us. i have also figured out it is their attempt to feel better about themselves. as i told him, when you are around people that put you down, turn around, tell them to get a good look at your butt because that is the last they are going to see of you. and leave. and next time they want to play, or with adults hang out or whatever, remind yourself of the last incident and say no. it is not negotiable except for them to change the way they treat you. it is not up to you to take crap from from people. jesus did not take crap from people. he got up, dusted his sandals off and headed on down the road. he found people who would listen to his message and did not waste time on those who gave him crap. maybe my language is strong here and crap offends some of you but you know what i am saying. hurt my children or someone i love and it brings out the ugly in me.
until next time...