God sometimes really puzzles me. for quite some time now i have been directing my church's video production. i love it. i love serving and this is a perfect fit for me. i try very hard to make it with some zip and give it some unique touches.
last sunday, or music and media minster said to me " i really need someone to take this ministry and run with it" and that was all he had to say. since then God has been working on me and i know this is a great opportunity for me. God does that to people. a seed gets planted and you never know who will step up. i did. i called and emailed him to tell him i would like to be the one. wish me luck.
until next time...
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Pearl Mississippi
it's been about a week since the last post so this may be long. then again, it may not. we ended up 2-3 in alabama and now we are on a 5 game series and we dropped tonight's game. gosh, these guys looked good.
when we were loading the bus, a hard rain came so i had some time to just sit and see some of the players with their families. most of the time, we are on the way somewhere or we are already there before or after a game. so, it's them and me. most of these guys are in their early 20's and are still "kids" except for the staff who are all well seasoned, mature men. some have played in the majors. to watch these guys with their wives and kids was very touching. i say goodbye to my children and hug them goodbye. i squeeze them hard when i get back home. same with them i found their soft spots and theirs are the same as mine-their families. it is kinda neat to see their kids (and for some their dogs but that is another blog) mix with the other players. i saw one kid run up to another player and jump into his arms. i don't know who got the most out of that exchange. i believe i did though.
on a sad note, 2 players did not get to come with us. they got "sent down" to "a" ball and i was sad that they were not coming. one in particular. saying goodbye to one of them for some reason bothered me. i shook hands with one of them as he got out of the shower. i have never shook hands with a naked man before. we needed to get on down the road. as i shook his hand, i said " i have never shaken a naked mans hand. he laughed and i told him i was going to miss him. he used to rub my head for "good luck" as he would get off the bus for a game. reminds me of one of my previous blogs about luck. hey. if it works. then again, it didn't appear to help him much.
until next time...
when we were loading the bus, a hard rain came so i had some time to just sit and see some of the players with their families. most of the time, we are on the way somewhere or we are already there before or after a game. so, it's them and me. most of these guys are in their early 20's and are still "kids" except for the staff who are all well seasoned, mature men. some have played in the majors. to watch these guys with their wives and kids was very touching. i say goodbye to my children and hug them goodbye. i squeeze them hard when i get back home. same with them i found their soft spots and theirs are the same as mine-their families. it is kinda neat to see their kids (and for some their dogs but that is another blog) mix with the other players. i saw one kid run up to another player and jump into his arms. i don't know who got the most out of that exchange. i believe i did though.
on a sad note, 2 players did not get to come with us. they got "sent down" to "a" ball and i was sad that they were not coming. one in particular. saying goodbye to one of them for some reason bothered me. i shook hands with one of them as he got out of the shower. i have never shook hands with a naked man before. we needed to get on down the road. as i shook his hand, i said " i have never shaken a naked mans hand. he laughed and i told him i was going to miss him. he used to rub my head for "good luck" as he would get off the bus for a game. reminds me of one of my previous blogs about luck. hey. if it works. then again, it didn't appear to help him much.
until next time...
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Catch Up Time
it is wednesday night in montgomery and we won after 2 losses. i have never been around these guys when the have lost 2 in a row. it was hard. as far as a road trip goes, it is a success so far. their record is 5-3 and we have 2 games to go. even if we lose the next 2 games and go home 5-5 it is still a good road trip. i don't think we will lose the next 2.
montgomery is a beautiful area. the homes in the downtown area are beautiful. the "first white house of the confederacy" is magnificent as well as the state capital building. i am going to find out how to add photos to this blog so you can see some of what i write about. the moss growing in the trees still amazes me but late at night is kinda spooky. for those of you who are history buffs this place is one to see. interesting contrast and similarities with washington. down here they still wave the confederate, or rebel flag. no comments either way from me although it is still a part of our history and heritage. admire it for what it is. i don't see the hate associated it as some seem to claim. but, then again, i am not african-american either.
this sunday is mother's day. i am thankful mine is still living. she is 82 years old. she is independant, lives alone, still drives and does not take medicine like other "seniors" do. i wish i could be with her but my schedule will not permit it. i am planning a trip to see her the last week of this month and will stay for a week. we have a 5 game series in the town she lives in and my 9 year old is going to go with me. it will be a great trip and i am looking forward to it. anytime i can see my mom, baseball, and have some of my kids with me is high on my list of having a good time.
until next time...
montgomery is a beautiful area. the homes in the downtown area are beautiful. the "first white house of the confederacy" is magnificent as well as the state capital building. i am going to find out how to add photos to this blog so you can see some of what i write about. the moss growing in the trees still amazes me but late at night is kinda spooky. for those of you who are history buffs this place is one to see. interesting contrast and similarities with washington. down here they still wave the confederate, or rebel flag. no comments either way from me although it is still a part of our history and heritage. admire it for what it is. i don't see the hate associated it as some seem to claim. but, then again, i am not african-american either.
this sunday is mother's day. i am thankful mine is still living. she is 82 years old. she is independant, lives alone, still drives and does not take medicine like other "seniors" do. i wish i could be with her but my schedule will not permit it. i am planning a trip to see her the last week of this month and will stay for a week. we have a 5 game series in the town she lives in and my 9 year old is going to go with me. it will be a great trip and i am looking forward to it. anytime i can see my mom, baseball, and have some of my kids with me is high on my list of having a good time.
until next time...
Saturday, May 5, 2007
I Miss My Dad
i miss my dad. he was a really neat guy. never met a stranger. he always had a nod or a word for most everybody he came in contact with. i guess that is where i get my core personality from.
dad died 4 years ago. he was 81 and up until 2 weeks before he dies, he was in good health to be his age. only 5 bypasses 10 years earlier and he lost a leg to an infection in his toe. minor diabetic too. he was not on insulin. he complained of his back and neck hurting and for him to complain, you knew he was in pain. mother took him to the doctor twice and even took him to the hospital which is a 5 minute drive. mid afternoon, march 17th, mother heard a loud noise and my father was motionless on the floor. he had tripped on his walker as he had not put his prosthesis on. she tried to roll him over and he was unconscious. she called 911 and they stayed on the phone until the paramedics got there. being so close to the hospital they were there within a few minutes. after the paramedics got there, they called for the advanced life support team. it took quite some time for them to stabilize him. one of the paramedics told my mother he was paralyzed before they put him on the gurney.
the loaded him in the ambulance and while they were working on him, my mother called me. i remember i was at work and when she called me, my knees buckled and i went to the floor. within 30 minutes of her call, i had gone home, packed my car and was on the road for the 5 hour drive. her call shook me so bad. i could tell she was so scared and hurting.
i got there about 9pm that night and he died 5 minutes into our 6pm icu visit the next day. i got to see him for about 5 minutes when i first arrived. i was walking down a hallway, lost, and just so happened they wheeled him by on the way to icu. i told him i loved him. that was the last time he was able to hear me.
tests showed when he fell, he broke his neck in 2 places. immediately he was in pain no longer. when his heart stopped, the team asked if he was dnr. i said i thought so. ultimately, i had to make the decision for them to stop. my mom was hurting so bad. her lifelong friend is dead. 2 years earlier, my brother died from renal cell carcinoma. in between, she had lost her sister. it had been a hard 3 years for her.
i say all this to say this: when i dropped the players off today at the gym, one of them was delayed getting off the bus. he seems to be a pretty well grounded guy. after about 5 minutes he got off the bus apologizing for the delay. he said he was talking to his dad and was apparently getting some advice. i told him no problem as i thought i sure wish i could talk to mine.
if your dad is still living, take a moment to call him if just to say hi. you never know if this may be your last chance.
until next time...
dad died 4 years ago. he was 81 and up until 2 weeks before he dies, he was in good health to be his age. only 5 bypasses 10 years earlier and he lost a leg to an infection in his toe. minor diabetic too. he was not on insulin. he complained of his back and neck hurting and for him to complain, you knew he was in pain. mother took him to the doctor twice and even took him to the hospital which is a 5 minute drive. mid afternoon, march 17th, mother heard a loud noise and my father was motionless on the floor. he had tripped on his walker as he had not put his prosthesis on. she tried to roll him over and he was unconscious. she called 911 and they stayed on the phone until the paramedics got there. being so close to the hospital they were there within a few minutes. after the paramedics got there, they called for the advanced life support team. it took quite some time for them to stabilize him. one of the paramedics told my mother he was paralyzed before they put him on the gurney.
the loaded him in the ambulance and while they were working on him, my mother called me. i remember i was at work and when she called me, my knees buckled and i went to the floor. within 30 minutes of her call, i had gone home, packed my car and was on the road for the 5 hour drive. her call shook me so bad. i could tell she was so scared and hurting.
i got there about 9pm that night and he died 5 minutes into our 6pm icu visit the next day. i got to see him for about 5 minutes when i first arrived. i was walking down a hallway, lost, and just so happened they wheeled him by on the way to icu. i told him i loved him. that was the last time he was able to hear me.
tests showed when he fell, he broke his neck in 2 places. immediately he was in pain no longer. when his heart stopped, the team asked if he was dnr. i said i thought so. ultimately, i had to make the decision for them to stop. my mom was hurting so bad. her lifelong friend is dead. 2 years earlier, my brother died from renal cell carcinoma. in between, she had lost her sister. it had been a hard 3 years for her.
i say all this to say this: when i dropped the players off today at the gym, one of them was delayed getting off the bus. he seems to be a pretty well grounded guy. after about 5 minutes he got off the bus apologizing for the delay. he said he was talking to his dad and was apparently getting some advice. i told him no problem as i thought i sure wish i could talk to mine.
if your dad is still living, take a moment to call him if just to say hi. you never know if this may be your last chance.
until next time...
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Just Another Road Win/Feelings
okay, we won. big deal? yes it is!!! anytime you win on the road, it is a good thing and yes, a big deal.
we left yesterday and it was a beautiful day to be on the road. sunny, mid 80's. it was a beautiful night for baseball. the team we are playing has a better record than us. we also had 3 or 4 players be "sent up" so that was great for them and their careers. now we have some new faces and to watch them come in and contribute like they did shows the professionalism they already have. in hanging around ballparks, i see a lot of people. most are very nice and share the same passion for baseball that i do. some look like the people your parents warned you about when growing up. the guys i am around have always been very respectful and i could not ask for better working relationships. i can't say enough good things about them. when we visit other parks and i see some of the other players and their attitudes, i know i am blessed (started to say lucky. see previous blog about luck).
while at the game last night, my 8 year old called me crying and told me she wanted me to come home and be with her. it rips your heart out when your kids do this. especially when it is day 1 of a 10 day trip. as i talked to her trying to calm her down and tell her how much i wanted to be with her and i loved her, it occurred to me she was in trouble with her mother!!! she was telling me about a house in their neighborhood for sale and she wanted me to buy it so she and her brother could ride their bicycles to see me. i knew then she was in deep trouble. and hurting.
as i think about her trying to express to me what she was really feeling, don't we as adults do the same thing? we are feeling something we can't, or won't, express so it comes out it a way that is different. we get mad at loved ones or friends over something small when that was not the root. as someone told me, "tell me what you think and i am not much help. tell me what you are feeling and i will do all i can to help". kids, as well as adults communicate much the same. sometimes we don't want to know what others are feeling. if we truly care, we will take the time to find out.
until next time...
we left yesterday and it was a beautiful day to be on the road. sunny, mid 80's. it was a beautiful night for baseball. the team we are playing has a better record than us. we also had 3 or 4 players be "sent up" so that was great for them and their careers. now we have some new faces and to watch them come in and contribute like they did shows the professionalism they already have. in hanging around ballparks, i see a lot of people. most are very nice and share the same passion for baseball that i do. some look like the people your parents warned you about when growing up. the guys i am around have always been very respectful and i could not ask for better working relationships. i can't say enough good things about them. when we visit other parks and i see some of the other players and their attitudes, i know i am blessed (started to say lucky. see previous blog about luck).
while at the game last night, my 8 year old called me crying and told me she wanted me to come home and be with her. it rips your heart out when your kids do this. especially when it is day 1 of a 10 day trip. as i talked to her trying to calm her down and tell her how much i wanted to be with her and i loved her, it occurred to me she was in trouble with her mother!!! she was telling me about a house in their neighborhood for sale and she wanted me to buy it so she and her brother could ride their bicycles to see me. i knew then she was in deep trouble. and hurting.
as i think about her trying to express to me what she was really feeling, don't we as adults do the same thing? we are feeling something we can't, or won't, express so it comes out it a way that is different. we get mad at loved ones or friends over something small when that was not the root. as someone told me, "tell me what you think and i am not much help. tell me what you are feeling and i will do all i can to help". kids, as well as adults communicate much the same. sometimes we don't want to know what others are feeling. if we truly care, we will take the time to find out.
until next time...
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
Is It Just Me Or What?
well, i am not vain enough to believe anything in this world is about me nor is my ego that large. my baseball team has dropped 5 or 6 games since i went to washington. the 2 games i went to before i left they won. tomorrow we are back on the road for 11 days. 5 games in birmingham and 5 games in montgomery then we return. when i am with them, they win.
my 8 year old had a softball game tonight. while she did not hit a home run, she got on base 3 times and scored twice. they won 14-10. they won last night also. coincidence? probably.
so what is it that brings us "good luck" or is their such a thing as luck? i don't believe in it good or bad. i do believe that there are things or people that make us feel better about ourselves and we find strength from that feeling. but when it comes down to it, it is the ability within us that makes us win or at least go that little extra and most times that is the difference. i am glad that i am not the instrument that brings luck, good or bad. i don't want that burden. i do try to to be an encourager and as a friend once said, "i'm just trying to be a blessing" and i like that philosophy.
life is to short to be around people that put us down or make us feel bad.
recently my son had an incident that left him feeling bad about himself. children can be so cruel to other children. not knowing how to express it, it came out inappropriately. i was talking to him about (actually probing which is a nice word for interrogation) and it finally hit me it was becoming a self image issue. if you are around enough bad influence we begin to believe what others are telling us. i have also figured out it is their attempt to feel better about themselves. as i told him, when you are around people that put you down, turn around, tell them to get a good look at your butt because that is the last they are going to see of you. and leave. and next time they want to play, or with adults hang out or whatever, remind yourself of the last incident and say no. it is not negotiable except for them to change the way they treat you. it is not up to you to take crap from from people. jesus did not take crap from people. he got up, dusted his sandals off and headed on down the road. he found people who would listen to his message and did not waste time on those who gave him crap. maybe my language is strong here and crap offends some of you but you know what i am saying. hurt my children or someone i love and it brings out the ugly in me.
until next time...
my 8 year old had a softball game tonight. while she did not hit a home run, she got on base 3 times and scored twice. they won 14-10. they won last night also. coincidence? probably.
so what is it that brings us "good luck" or is their such a thing as luck? i don't believe in it good or bad. i do believe that there are things or people that make us feel better about ourselves and we find strength from that feeling. but when it comes down to it, it is the ability within us that makes us win or at least go that little extra and most times that is the difference. i am glad that i am not the instrument that brings luck, good or bad. i don't want that burden. i do try to to be an encourager and as a friend once said, "i'm just trying to be a blessing" and i like that philosophy.
life is to short to be around people that put us down or make us feel bad.
recently my son had an incident that left him feeling bad about himself. children can be so cruel to other children. not knowing how to express it, it came out inappropriately. i was talking to him about (actually probing which is a nice word for interrogation) and it finally hit me it was becoming a self image issue. if you are around enough bad influence we begin to believe what others are telling us. i have also figured out it is their attempt to feel better about themselves. as i told him, when you are around people that put you down, turn around, tell them to get a good look at your butt because that is the last they are going to see of you. and leave. and next time they want to play, or with adults hang out or whatever, remind yourself of the last incident and say no. it is not negotiable except for them to change the way they treat you. it is not up to you to take crap from from people. jesus did not take crap from people. he got up, dusted his sandals off and headed on down the road. he found people who would listen to his message and did not waste time on those who gave him crap. maybe my language is strong here and crap offends some of you but you know what i am saying. hurt my children or someone i love and it brings out the ugly in me.
until next time...
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