Thru My Windshield

my friday the 13th

2009-11-13T17:52:00.000-08:00

today has been a day that can only be described as friday the 13th. really weird.
today, i had 2 stops to make in the johnson city area and take them to paris landing state park. no big deal, just a long day.
as i have aged, at times, i get very emotional. their is a song by michael english called "the prodigal son". i have grown very attached to this song and today i listened to it over and over for almost 2 hours. there is a story here i will not dive into, but when i hear it, how i long for one more moment with my dad. so much i want to tell him, about how right he was and how dumb i was for thinking i new better on everything.
anyway, later into my trip, the john denver song, "poems, prayers and promises" played and lots more emotions came back. i can't cry and drive. it's not professional!!!
i always prayed to God to just let me live long enough to see my children accept christ and be baptized. that was all i needed then he could bring me home. well, they have, and i am still here. driving up I24 into clarksville, i decide to call my mom. i am in paris, tn. and my nephew lives here. he only met my brother, his father, one time and that was by accident. i always felt like he got the short end of the deal never knowing his father. dirty laundry will not get cleaned here.
anyway, my mom has his phone numbers and i really had a strong leading to visit him while i was here. my mom did not answer so i left a message on her answering machine something like this,"mom, sorry to bother you. i am on my way to paris and i need jonathan's phone numbers. i want to call him and try to visit. love you mom". simple enough, right. well, not too long after that, i lost cell phone coverage. as i am driving along, listening to john denver, i could not help but praise God for the wonderful life he has blessed me with. 4 wonderful children. loved and been loved by some good women (and bad). finally found a job i love. where i live, gotta give him credit for that. it is awesome. my health is good, i have some wonderful friends. seen some things along the way that both touched me and humbled me. today, most everywhere i looked, i could see the hand of God. oh, and i am happier right now than i ever have been in my life. if it all ended now, i would be so selfish to complain. hold all these thoughts.
i get to the hotel, drop my passengers off, and go to my hotel. i am staying in another hotel about 15 miles away. i still have no phone service.
anyway, i get checked into my hotel, and when i get my laptop out, plug in my laptop, and call my youngest 2. no answer so i call their mom. she does not recognize the number calling but answers anyway. i said "hey, just checking on isaac and grace and make sure they have this number". she starts asking me about the tree, how bad was i hurt, was everybody else ok, where i was, and on and on!! of course my reponse was, huh?
my mom, bless her heart, is 84 and lives alone. when she listened to the message, she "heard" me say, "i have hit a tree, i am hurt, everybody else is ok" and that is all she heard.
well, she starts calling me back, doesn't get me for about 2-3 hours. she calls the neighbors. they all come over. they know i am pinned in the bus, after hitting a tree, and i am calling to tell my mom bye. they all start calling. she calls my ex's house, leaves 2 frantic messages (which the kids hear and freak out cause dad is probably dead). they both call my office, the owner answers, and hears frantic calls from 2 different women. he gets online, tracks my bus by gps, and it is sitting still with the engine running. he calls my cell, no answer. he activates the drive cam, and he can tell i am where i am supposed to be, but not on the bus. weirdly, i am sitting with a big tree in front of my bus. he calls the park rangers, police, and has an apb put out on me!!! so, now not only am i dead, or dying, but i am wanted by the police. in the meantime, while all of this is going on, i am driving, listening to "poems, prayers, and promises". kinda creepy, huh?
no, this is not a spoof. it really happened. i have the witnesses to support all of this.
until next time...

kicking myself all night

2009-11-06T22:01:00.000-08:00

today i had the pleasure of picking up the university of memphis football team at the airport. kinda ironic based on my last post about "you can't make this stuff up" because when we do sports team pickups, we drive thru secure gates right on the tarmac right under the plane!!!
anyway, when we got there, we pulled up beside a navy trainer (a T4?) and i wanted to take some pics. my camera is always in my backpack but i have been taking a lot of pics at home posting most on facebook. it was not there. so, i used my phone. i don't care how good the phone, phone pics suck, at best. shot several pics, kicked myself in the butt.
we had a police escort to their hotel. police escorts are very cool. you don't slow down, they are usually high speed, and exciting to say the least. a pic would have been nice. kicked self in butt, again.
after the hotel, we got another escort to neyland stadium. not only TO neyland stadium, we parked UNDER neyland stadium. very cool. kicked myself again. once unloaded, we reset our buses (sorry, there were 3 of us). soon, i realized not only were we under the stadium, we were at field level. a 50 yard walk and i was standing in the south end zone!!! very cool. kicked myself again. walked around the field, looking UP at the seats. very cool. kicked myself again. they finished their workout and another police escort back to their hotel. during these escorts, we don't stop. traffic is stopped for us at all intersections. i have been in dozens of them and it never gets old. i just wish i had my camera. and, my butt hurts.
after some down time, we ate and drove them to a movie. while sitting there waiting i pulled out my laptop. when i opened my computer bag, guess what i found?
i am still kicking myself. hard!!!
until next time... yes, i put my camera back in my backpack where it should have been to begin with!!!

another episode of "you can't make this stuff up"

2009-11-05T20:01:00.000-08:00

yesterday i took a group on a tour of some installations in oak ridge. hold that thought for a moment.
when i got back to my office yesterday after a local trip, my boss told me he was pulling me off of a trip he had me set up to do.
it was a simple trip-a local high school track team going to nashville for a meet, an overnight (i was looking forward to because it meant i might spend time with my daughter) and then back home saturday. simple enough. i have made dozens of them.
when he told me, i asked why. he told me i was no longer qualified. thinking a pink slip was coming, i asked why. he told me that the knox county school system now requires all bus drivers be fingerprinted, a background check (another) a new photo id and a drug test (another). i had to laugh.
we, as a company and me personally, are approved department of defense contractors. i have had the high honor and privilege of transporting troops all over from fort polk, la to quantico va. i have been on many military bases and in some restricted areas. as i said, i am qualified. the group i drove to oak ridge, went to y-12, ornl and several other very sensitive areas. if you cross the wrong line, their orders are literally "shoot to kill". i even drove up to the building where our nations supply of uranium is stored. when we got there, i had to surrender my camera, my cellphone and my pepper spray. and yes, another background check. i don't know if when a background check is done, all other inquiries show up like a credit report. if it did, it had to have been several pages long. of course, i passed.
it hit me when greg said i was no longer qualified how ironic it was that i can go on military installations, see where the u.s. government stores its uranium, but i am not "qualified" to drive a high school track team.
like i said, you can't make this stuff up!!!
until next time...

yes, i am back

2009-11-05T19:39:00.000-08:00

what an incredible summer it has been. i have found myself in a dilemna. being off for 10 months gave me a lot of time to post regularly. after coming back to work in april, i have been on the run quite a lot.
baseball is over and i am having withdrawals. the smokies made it to the southern league championships and we lost to jacksonville. being 2nd was hard to swallow but was, nevertheless, an amazing accomplishment. getting to know a new group of players was fun and seeing them develop as they did was impressive. at the same time, seeing the guys i have driven in years past playing for the cubs, well, it was easy to swell up with pride. some went on to other teams in the majors, but those in the cubs organization was especially fulfilling.
meeting ryne sandberg was an amazing experience for me. driving him was more than any kid could dream for. but i can't forget the other staff members who are coaching with him, well, i have a special memory of them as well.
most of all, it is the people i get to meet in the ballparks. normal, everyday people from blue collar workers to white collar executives, all brought together by the love of a game. returning to the parks and seeing them, shaking hands, hugging most is a time in my life i cherish. several i have the pleasure of keeping in contact with. my life is a very fulfilled one.
this season, we ended up driving about 20,000 miles. most trips were 6 day trips with weird hours and some wild times. even getting to know the people in the host hotels and then going back to catch up with them was a wonderful experience. i can tell you more about getting around in jacksonville or mobile or several other cities than i can getting around knoxville.
when i was getting back into the swing of coming back to work, i got addicted to facebook and have spent most of my life writing there. i love to write and it filled a gap, but being here fills a huge void. most of my life for the past several years is on here and it is time to get back to regular posting here.
i have other things to post so i am not going to dump it all here. i don't know if i will be driving the smokies next year. our contract is up and i don't know if we will get it or not. i hope i do get one more year. rumor has it sandberg is coming back and i would be a fool not to step back into the dream. ryne and his wife margaret are wonderful people and i would be honored to be their driver one more time.
until next time...

bernard

2009-07-16T22:31:00.000-07:00

my life is an incredibly blessed one. i am without a doubt the most blessed man who has ever walked the face of God's green earth. part of this is the people i have met.

in all of the ballparks i go to, i know a lot of people from security to the "clubbies", ticket takers to fans, local law enforcement to the people who-do-i-don't-know-what-but-they-get-paid-anyway.

i have known bernard for 3 years and he never ceases to amaze me. every year when i see him, we shake hands, give bear hugs, and seem genuinely glad to see each other. lately, his bear hugs have gotten less "bearish".

before every game, he sits at his post and checks the other workers in and a host of other things. and he is always smiling. today when i dropped the players off, i saw him struggling to walk with his cane, partially paralyzed on one side. i couldn't help but choke up.

during the game, his duties were over and it was time for him to go home. i stopped him for a chat and to ask how he was doing. he told me he was good and i told him i thought he looked good. he said, smiling, "i am. i have a few problems but i am happy". last time we talked, he told me he had 1/2 of one of his feet removed, but he was happy. tonight, i asked him how his foot was doing. we talked for a few more minutes and he shared so much. his father was a common laborer for some large company and died of mesothelioma. he told me he needs more surgery. i asked, "what this time?" half kiddingly. he told me his doctor needs to replace both knees, both hips, and he also is having some neurological issues that are worsening. he told me he was a boxer growing up and his doctors think that is where it came from. "but i am happy". here is a man, i guess in his mid 60's, needing all of these surgeries as well as suffering neurologically, all the surgeries he has had, and he is genuinely happy! i really wanted to hug him and tell him i love him and i am blessed to know him.

i thought back to something bear grylls (man vs wild) said and i have to think about my own life. bear said, and i quote:

'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, covered in scars, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'yahoo!', what a ride.'

until next time...

you just can't make this stuff up

2009-07-10T00:01:00.000-07:00

i admit it, i am a voyeur. now, before you go down than path, i only mean i am a "people watcher". the more i observe, the more people become like those animals at the zoo. probably don't know someone is watching. equally, most don't care.

i have another one of those moments that i have got to pass along. i wrote about my experience in jacksonville with the security guard telling me that bus parking does not mean bus parking even though the sign say "bus parking only".

here is another one for your amusement and comes from the renassaince in mobile.

this hotel had spent tens of millions of dollars renovating this property. one thing they did was move the main entry from the water street side to the rear. at the rear is a large canopy for guests to check in and out.
i had been loading/unloading the players under the canopy which is about 3-4 car lanes wide. when i am doing a movement with the players, it is a pull up and get off or a park and scramble so i am there about 10-15 minutes.

about the 3rd day, i pull under the canopy and the players are coming on to the bus. one of the "valets" comes up to the bus with a message.
"Valet Manager says you can't come in here anymore". i asked "why"? i was told that he said it blocked traffic and they did not want me there. i said, "you know i am here for only a few minutes" to which she replied, "people only come in here for a few minutes and then leave, Valet Manager's orders". i looked over at a mercedes that had been parked under the canopy everytime i was there. i said, "how come i have to move but he parks here all the time"? she told me it was the Valet Managers!!! i told her i should be able to be allowed to stop here for 10 minutes twice a day. we have about 20 rooms here for 5 nights" to which she replies, again, "Valet Manager's" orders. By now i am fuming. I told her this was not fair and i demanded to see him.
her reply? "well, he is in a customer service meeting and told us not to bother him".

like i said, you can't make this up!!!

until next time...

"michael jackson is dead and i don't feel so good myself"

2009-06-25T22:35:00.000-07:00

like most of the world, i watched the "play by play" unfold of michael jackson's death today on fox news.

i have had my own thoughts and feelings about the self professed "king of pop" and was leaning in the direction of him being about as innocent as o.j.

i was listening to greta van susteren and shepard smith as they danced around the issue of telling the world that he was dead but needed more credible information. they were talking about his life and the more they showed of his life, it started to look more like a freak parade. over the span of his life, incidents involving him would come and go and over time, we forget a lot of things. seeing his life in a 15 minute capsule make me really see this was one weird, strange guy. as in the movie "trading places", was he a product of heredity or environment? he was 5'11" tall and weighed 120lbs. he had no childhood. he became famous practically as a toddler and was in the limelight and he was quoted as saying he never felt loved.

my personal thoughts aside, one statement came out that really hit me hard. one of the countless people who "knew him well" was with him at some show in australia. as usual, he had kids all around him and this person asked him about the kids and made the comment to him about what people said about him and children and why they were always around him. this guy said he remembered michael jackson looking him squarely in the eyes and said, "because they are the only ones who tell me the truth".

you can't argue the fact that he was extremely talented. he was perhaps the greatest showman we will see in our lifetime. he sold something like 750 million albums and is not only in the rock and roll hall of fame, he is in there twice. it was said he was close to being, if not, a billionaire (his debts were almost that much as well).
but, what we remember more than anything else, his personal life was like the proverbial "bus full of nuns rolling off a cliff". a horrible tragedy.

"Because they are they only ones who tell me the truth" was perhaps the saddest statement i have ever heard in my life. of all the people he had around him, whom he called friends, his family, etc, people used him for their own gain and told him what they thought he wanted to hear at the time, well, you get the picture. but as usual, i found a life lesson there. i wonder, if people look at me or think about me and my relationship with them, could they think the same of me? how many people in my life could i say the same about?

i know a lot of people. i have met a lot of people in my lifetime, probably tens of thousands over my 52 years. is there anybody out there that i have a solid enough relationship with that could say i am the only one who would tell them the truth? unfortunately there is not. equally sad is i can't say the same about anyone else.

tomorrow is a new day and i now have this thought to carry forward with me. it is something i now see i must work on and it will be painful at times but the end result will be worth it.

rest in peace michael. God knows you did not find it here.

until next time...

fathers day

2009-06-23T22:18:00.000-07:00

i loved my dad. he was one of the most moral, character filled men i have ever known. growing up, we did not have much but we had what we needed. he never knew a stranger and people who knew him loved him. he was quick to bust my butt (always when i needed it) and he would use reason if you asked why. he was funny, witty, and could talk to anybody no matter their place in life, their skin color or anything else. when he looked at people, that is what he saw-people. he taught me how to play poker and he taught me how to fish. he took me hunting and he took me for target practice. he came to my sporting games and i really can't ever remember him "not being there" his advise was dead on but only gave it when asked.

he loved my mom and she loved him. he served in WWII and was proud he did. he was never too busy if i needed help with something and when i needed advice, he was right 100 out of 100 times.

he worked hard for the telephone company all his life. never thought about changing jobs. he might have made better money somewhere else but he would not take a risk because he did everything for the benefit of his family.

very few times i saw him scared. i did see him hurt when wronged and i saw him cry. i remember the day before he died. i was in knoxville and they lived about 300 miles away. my mom called me while i was at work. she was crying and so scared. my dad was everything to her and the mighty oak was being chopped down.
it was just her and i in the room when he died and i had to make the decision for him to be taken off the respirator. i knew it was what he would have wanted. he also knew it would hurt us badly. and it did. when i go back to see my mom, i go to the cemetery to visit and talk to him. it might look odd for me to go there in a 45' motorcoach but i would not miss the opportunity for anything.

as i try to be an influence and guide in my children's lives, i often wonder what dad would have done. did i do it right?

as i look back, i never told him how much i respected him. i never thought about thanking him for all he did for my mom, my brother and myself. i never told him i love you as much as i should have. my dad was the neatest guy i have ever known and i miss him more every day and as i age, i need him more every day.

happy fathers day, dad. i love you.

until next time...

5 generations of service

2009-06-16T15:31:00.000-07:00

on the road i get to meet some interesting people. some are forgetable, some i can't help but think about almost daily.

while in mobile, i spent 5 nights in the company of "henry". henry is a somewhat quiet guy who goes about his work unassumingly. late 50's, long, gray hair, a few "tats" and doesn't like talking about himself. he is fiercely loyal to his family and his wife of 37 years.

on the 2nd night, he opened up some and told me about his family. he is retired military and spent 24 years in the elite special forces. he told me his family serving in the military spans 5 generations for a total of 145 years!!! as i listened to him open up, he told me he had been wounded (shot) 3 times and had 3 purple hearts. he told me he had been shot in the shoulder requiring pins, screws and pretty much rebuilding his shoulder. he then told me about landing in a "hot LZ" and as soon as he hit the ground, he was shot in the upper inside thigh. he was concerned he had his "boys" blown off but the medic assured "all apparatus" was intact. the next time was in the knee requiring a total knee replacement. after he told me, i said "you qualify for Arlington". he said "yeah", but i want to be close to my family.

what really set me back was when he told me he had them in a storage container in the shed behind his house. i asked "why don't you have them in a display case". his answer was "because nobody cares". "most people don't care what me and many other people have done. i have had very few people outside family i can talk about it with. most people don't want to talk about it because it does not impact their day to day lives". i said, "but it does". he said he knew it did but then he got up to get back to his work.

it upsets me to think about his comments. my previous posts address how i appreciate our military and all they have and continue to do. but for a decorated vet with 3 purple hearts really got to me.

next week we celebrate july 4th. does anybody really know why? is it just another day off to go to the lake, cookout and get drunk? what are we celebrating? if this vet doesn't think anyone cares, why do we celebrate our freedoms if we can't show gratitude to the ones who helped us obtain and keep them?

until next time...

do deer believe in karma?

2009-05-31T16:16:00.001-07:00

last night (actually, early this morning) i hit a deer just outside greensboro, nc. i have often wondered what i would do if and when i ever hit an animal. i love wildlife and some of the things that bring me the most joy besides my children are watching animals. a few nights ago, i thought back to christmas eve last year when we had the 4 deer in my front yard. i posted about it and looking out my front door reminded me of that special night. i have a momma groundhog living in my barn and she has 3 pups. we have enjoyed watching them so much. and a wayward turkey we named "george".
i think any professional driver should rehearse the what if. if a car cuts me off, i will do this. if an animal runs in front of me, i will do that. i thought it would prepare me. it did not.
i was having a good ride and it was a beautiful night. and then, out of no where and in less than a second, it was over.
i try to look farther ahead and on the sides of the road especially at night. i thought that if i ever did hit an animal, it would be in the country or some desolate spot. i40 thru greensboro is i think, 5 or 6 lanes each way. it is very well lit. not where you think a deer would be. all i remember is me yelling, "oh god" and then the impact and i will not describe further. split second. i recognized the head of the deer and then impact. 70-75 mph and i new it was a quick kill so she did not suffer. but, i did and am.
i never backed off or slowed down. nothing i could do. i wanted to scream. i wanted to curse god for putting me then and there. i wanted to cry. sob. why me? he knows i love his creatures (except snakes and mosquitoes) and i try to take care of them by feeding them. yes, i know i have dominion over all animals so why do i hurt so bad? as i collected my thoughts, i began to ask god for forgiveness for what i had done. i was shaking. i did it over and over and i still am. i have heard time heals all hurts and i wish time would fly by.
the front end of the bus is a mess and thankfully after i called the owner at 0315, he actually was not angry. he could tell in my quivering voice it was traumatic. and in about 13 hours later, i have a replacement bus so all is well with the players.
i know all will work out. but, i can't help but wonder if deer have a way of communicating with each other over long distances, and, do deer believe in karma?
until next time...

happy, kentucky

2009-05-23T21:19:00.000-07:00

i started to title this post "teachers gone wild" but in keeping with my policy of protecting those (well, most anyway) i decided to tone it down so as not to get them fired!!!
i love kentucky and i love the people from there. when most think of kentucky, they think of lexington (another favorite city of mine) and louisville (not!!!). but there is so much more.
some of the most real people i have met have come from kentucky. i have an ex brother-in-law who is a farmer in western ky and he is one of the most straight up people i have ever known and i miss him. the ruggedness in southeast kentucky is an absolute wonder. it is primitive and still some of the people very clanish. coal miners. depression. high unemployment. poverty at the worst i have ever seen. i have been many places that when you are driving down the road, you see signs warning "ATV Crossing". one town in particular (kenvir (see mission of hope trip post) actually had atv parking at a church!!!
at this moment, i have a group that has been really fun. they are from happy, kentucky. i guess you could say it is a suburb of hazard, kentucky!!! really hard to find on the map. my tomtom, when i was entering the information, burped, and said, "where? are you kidding?"
happy is at best, small. to most of america, non-existent. it became real to me as i went there twice and spent an enjoyable weekend with about 22-23 of it residents.
as i mentioned, alot of the people in rural areas (wilderness!!!) such as this tend to be "clannish" and i do not mean it in any negative way. the point is, they stick together.
being from a community this small, the kids i had with me will experience relationships with their schoolmates that few of us will ever have the chance to know.
the teachers were smokin' hot and the kids were very polite and respectful. we stayed at "wilderness at the smokies" and it was incredible place. so incredible, my kids and i are going for a week the end of june.
i toned this post down. i was really prepared to talk about the teachers and their "teachers gone wild" attitude. as i also said, i don't want to get them fired but i do have video i will let go to the highest bidder!!! just kidding. they were a great group and i would be honored to take them anywhere.
sevier county is NOT one of my favorite places to go, particularly gatlinburg. the area from sevierville to the park i very pretty and i am proud to have it in my backyard, however, tourists do not know how to drive inheavy traffic and some exhibit that "too bad, i got mine" attitude. gatlinburg is the least motorcoach friendly city i have driven in. d.c. is easier than gatlinburg and the roads are much more navigable. all that being said, i still have a job to do and a responsibility to get my passengers wherever they need to be as safely and quickly as i can. it can't all be easy and carefree.
to the teachers: this was not as bad as it could have been considering all i saw this weekend!!!
until next time...

confession and an appeal for forgiveness

2009-05-23T20:24:00.000-07:00

this is one of the hardest things i have done in my life. opening myself up like this is very painful. it is not the sympathy i am looking for. i am looking for someone.
things in life have a way of haunting you, especially when you do the wrong thing and hurt someone.
for years now, i have tried to find a girl from jackson, tennessee named mary teresa hayes. terri was a sweethart and she did not deserve how i ended up treating her.
i don't remember how we met, i think it was from another friend. her father was an accountant, and her mother was sick, very sick. cancer. and it was terminal. she went to northside high school in jackson, tennessee. i think i had graduated.
everyday, after school until bedtime, it was her job to care for her mother and fill in for her doing all the things a homemaker does plus doing homework and trying to be a teenager. her father was abusive to her. i don't know all of the story, i only know he was a very angry man. i will never forget the time he pulled a gun on me in the parking lot of a methodist church one sunday night. he was serious.
we continued to see each other despite the threats. his anger escalated until one night, she ran away and wandered the streets until dawn and she called me to pick her up. several hours later, her father found her at my house. he came in to talk to my parents and he was so polite and kind. he assured them it was just teenagers being teenagers and things were going to be better.
after he got her home, he beat her. then enrolled her at harrison-chilhowee baptist academy which was over 300 miles away and pretty much left her there. she continued to write me and i wrote her for awhile and i slowly stopped. her mother died and she called me. i would not call her back and left her with no one who really cared for her.
somewhere about this time, the oak ridge boys came out with the song, "i'll be true to you" and the lyrics were so true except except for the overdose. here are the lyrics:

They met upon a blue moon,
And they parted on a cloudy day
They were so in love and out of school,
But he was goin' so far, far away.

She said: "I'll be true to you,
"Even though you don't want me to.
"And I'll be blue for you,
"Even though you've asked me not to."

Well the year's drifted by them, as we all know they can.
He found other women, but she refused other men.
But as fate would have it, they met again,
She was on a down-hill slide, and he was just slidin' in.

As he looked into her eyes that night, he never realize.
The only real love in his life was passin' by.
When he turned and left her there, his words: "Goodbye".
He heard her calling out to him, and as he walked, she cried:

"I've been true to you.
"Seems like speakin' to me is the least that you could do.
"And I've been blue for you,
"Even though you've asked me not to."

She'd been drinkin way too hard one night,
She'd been drinkin way too long.
Alone and pale in a cheap hotel, she died there in the dawn.
Kneelin' by the grave, oh so late and oh so wrong,
He longed to hold her close again, cryin' on and on.

He cried: "I''ll be true to you.
"After all that I have put you through.
"And I'll be blue for you,
"Though you never even asked me to."

sometimes we don't have the opportunity to attempt to make things right despite how hard we try. i have tried and i will never give up. this one haunts me and as i have felt the pain of this one, it has taught me many lessons.
we don't always feel the hurt we cause others because of our self obsessing tendencies. me first. i'll get mine, you get yours when you can. help me, but i am too busy to help you. a friend lost. a family member (BEH) lost. we attempt a "sorry" but sometimes then is not the time to make up. sometimes it takes some time for healing to start before the sincerity of an "i am sorry" holds significance.
please, if you have hurt someone, take the time to contact them and make things right before time runs out. we are not guaranteed tomorrow for it is only a moment away and God knows the timeline. and, if i have ever hurt you, i am sorry. i truly am.
until next time...

knoxville to chattanooga to knoxville to athens to...

2009-05-23T11:44:00.000-07:00

sometimes, i forget where i am. i also forget who i am but that is another post.
in the last week, i have been driving quite a bit.
in 48 hours, it went something like this. i woke up in chattanooga, and left for knoxville (actually kodak) about 3pm, dropped off the players, went to the ballpark, fueled up, went to my office, went home (couldn't get the bus up my driveway), back to my office, then athens, then back to chattanooga, cleveland, back to athens, then knoxville, then to hazard, kentucky and then to sevierville. i will post later about these kentuckians.
it may sound like a pain and at times it is. i love every second i spend behind the wheel of my bus and i love the people i drive. i just checked and in the last week, i have driven over 1500 miles and after tomorrow, it will be about 2000 miles in 8 days!!! i have stayed in 4 different hotels and used about 205 gallons of fuel plus another 70 tomorrow for a total of about 275 gallons at a cost of just over $625. i have not slept in my bed in over a week.
my life is far from ordinary. i miss my children and i miss my home. attached is a photo. once you see the view i have, you will understand. i never knew how much wandering blood i had and how deep it was. i love traveling and all the challenges that come up. there is only one other thing i have done that brings me so much pleasure as driving (well, besides being a father) and that is photography. i shot professionally for several years and it is probably the only job i would quit this one for.
some of you asked and here it is. my life!!!

until next time...

sights for sore eyes

2009-05-23T11:25:00.000-07:00

there is an expression here in the south that goes, "you are a sight for sore eyes" which is redneck for it is good to see you, that you are a friend, and you hold a special place in my life.
after a 5 game road trip with the smokies, i was sent to a nearby town to take a middle school to chattanooga for the day. this was to be my 6th day in a row to be in chattanooga and i wanted a change of scenery. don't get me wrong, chattanooga is one of my favorite cities but even too much of the good stuff gets old.
when i pulled up to the school and the kids were getting on, a man walked up to me and i paid no attention until i saw who it was. "remember me"? yes, i sure did!!!
mike is the principal at this school and 2 years ago i took him and some of his pupils to d.c. and had a great time. he is one of those people that his kids all know he is a good man and cares about them very much. i don't know about his administrative abilities, but when i see the respect the kids show him, you know he is well liked and admired.
after i looked up and saw him, i recognized him and without hesitation i hugged him, spilling his coffee!!! it was so good to see him and being around him you instantly feel some connection.
we went to several of the top places (tourist) and the day was a good one for everybody.
as i said in a previous post, seeing an old friend and getting to spend some time with them is time well spent. spending time with mike is no exception. but, being in the moment, i had to think about my life.
if i died tomorrow and had time to reflect on my amazing life, i would have a heart full of significant moments in my life to carry with me from seeing 3 of my children baptized (by God's saving grace), my parents, things i have seen and done, and, the people i have met.
life is a pretty good ride. i have learned that if you care about someone, tell them and tell them often. if you love them, tell them and tell them often. a friend once told me "if you love someone, tell them before someone else does" and that is good advice.
until next time...

wow!!!!!!!!

2009-05-23T11:08:00.000-07:00

many times, i have written about how i feel about being so blessed. way more than one man should be. for some reason, it just keeps on.
my trip to chattanooga is always a good one. i have made some friends over the years at all of the ballparks i go to, but this one is special. catch up with friends is always time well spent.
tonight, at at&t field, it was one of those "bring your pet to the park night" which is always interesting. however, i was blind-sided by who sang the Star Spangled Banner.
i can't remember his name, and yes, it is important because of several things. first, he is a huge chattanooga lookouts fan. second, he is paralyzed, in a wheelchair, and uses one of those text-to speech keyboards attached to his chair. i don't always pay attention to the person singing as i feel the message is more important than the messenger. the messenger over-rode the message. when it was time, he pressed a button on the keyboard and his pre-recorded rendition was played.
i sometimes get emotional when it is sung really well with personal touches. this went beyond it. as i was taught, when our anthem is played, we are to look at the flag and reflect on the great heritage of our country. tonight, my eyes, as well as most in the park, were fixed on him. when it was finished, just before the applause and after, you could hear the "sniffing sounds" from those around you. lots of people were crying and even the burliest of those had some wet eyes. i am trying to get an image from one of the photogs there and when i do, i will upload it. it was truly one of those moments in your life that makes you proud of where you were at a particular place and time. i was very honored to be able to witness it.
until next time...

i know i am a "little" different than your average "bear"

2009-05-18T13:03:00.000-07:00

sometimes on the road, i have toooooo much time on my hands and that can be a bad thing. i am in chattanooga and the last 3 road trips have had a lot of rain which means rained out games. i have to do something with my time so, i study people.
i never much cared for reading mysteries and all that new age crap. i don't much care for how the stars and moon line up either. all i have to do is talk to the one who made the stars. so, i prefer biographies or even better, auto-biographies. i go to the mall only to watch people.
i am not a perv or some type of voyeur, well, maybe i am. i find it fascinating trying to predict peoples actions and reactions.
i came back to the hotel with the intent of reading about bobby jones, arguably the best golfer who has ever lived. www.bobbyjones.com
bobby jones was a remarkable man. he is the only person in recorded history who has won the grand slam of golf. golf was only a game to him and it is kind of funny when you consider he retired from golf not yet at his peak to practice law.
one of my favorite movies is "the legend of bagger vance" that starred will smith and matt damon. will smiths character was so strong he took the part although many say he took a backseat to matt damon. i have seen this movie countless times and everytime i watch it, i see something different.
anyway, the guys on the bus wanted to watch it so that is why i started with bobby jones. and that led to walter hagan and many other golfers of that era and also into the history of golf, and, this only started me looking.
the main part of this all this led me to, and i don't know how other than randomness.
recently, there was a local moonshiner named marvin "popcorn" sutton who passed. he was the epitome of an appalachian moonshine maker. his only thing in life was "likker". he even made stills for others.
"popcorn" was arrested while he was finishing off making 800 gallons of the prized sqeezins' and he was sentenced to 18 months in the pokey. his comment while in court was "i would rather be dead than in jail" and he made his wish come true the day before he was to report. like a sponge i absorbed all i could find about this remarkable man. his daughter, sky sutton, has a blog about her father and there is a link to a book about him.
www.popcornsutton.blogspot.com.
for those of you who remember (or don't) the movie "thunder road", it was about "shiners" and their lives and all the romance associated with the lifestyle. sometimes late at night when i am driving, my mind drifts into one of these "shine" runners in some souped up car running at nascar speeds on some back country road (it's birthplace) avoiding the law and making my delivery of the much sought after liquid corn. i guess i will research nascar and junior johnson next and yes, that will be another blog. steve earle sang the song "copperhead road" and that sets a catchy tune with all of this. btw, if you drink moonshine, is it considered a serving of vegetables?
i have spent much time looking at his photos and hopefully the ones attached will say more about him than i ever can. there is only one photo i have spent more time looking at in my life so far and it is a grandmother (don't know how many greats or how far up the tree she is) of mine. she was full blooded cherokeee and when i see it there is so much she is trying to say. anyway, back to "popcorn".
if you take the time, photographs can reveal a lot about a person. in their silence some can speak louder than if they were in person. tell me what you think.
until next time...
p.s. double-header tonight!!!

1 lucky man or blessed more than i deserve?

2009-04-27T11:38:00.000-07:00

I am still the luckiest man in the world

I have always felt lucky. don’t know why, and to be truthful, I am. most every night, I am blessed to be in a ballpark somewhere in the southeast. every night I get to hear the “star spangled banner”. I, like most others, place my hand over my heart and stand there.
tonight, I was talking to one of the security people and come to find out, he goes to church with my cousin and knew most of my family. this was the same cousin who called me about a month ago to tell me my mother had been involved in a car accident.
as we were talking, a military color guard came on the field to present the colors. in other words, they marched on the field carrying a flag and our national anthem was played and sung.
tonight is kinda breezy so the flag was blowing quite a bit. the top right side of the field flag is torn and starting to fray. as I stood there, I thought about francis scott key as he wrote the star spangled banner and what an incredible sight it must have been as the smoke from battle cleared and the flag could not only be seen, it was still standing which meant not only was there victory, but that we would be free of the chains of tyranny.
I listened to the words and thought of that scene and had to give thanks to be a part of something much, much bigger than me. this country is very blessed and always has been since we became a nation and yes, I do believe God led the hearts and minds of several men to be our founding fathers. as I look at all of the challenges that face us from wall street to main street to your street and mine, we are still free and I prayerfully hope we always be. we will never be perfect and I hope we never are because then we strive for more. but at least we have the freedom to exercise our liberties. countless men and women have given their lives and their time to protect us and to them I am grateful. as I stood there, it almost became overwhelming to think of a much bigger picture.
I am, without any doubt, the luckiest man alive.

until next time…

west tenn

2009-04-27T11:35:00.000-07:00

i am back west tennessee for a five game road trip. this is my hometown and it is always kinda weird for me to come back here. my mom is still here and living in the same house we all grew up in. about a month ago, she had a serious car wreck and totaled her car. she is 84 and it scares me she still drives. her dr. tried to get her off the road by sending her to a re-hab place that assesses seniors to see if they still have the skills necessary to safely drive. she can barely walk across the room. so she goes to this place, takes 3 hours of testing, and passes!!! I can’t believe it. tomorrow, we are going car shopping.

last night was a slow night. the home team scored first and it was 1-0. top of the 5th with one on, one of our guys jacks a monster over the left field wall. later, we scored 2 more then they scored 2 more. final, 4-3 us. it has been fun watching these guys come together and play as a team. i really think they are going to the playoffs. all of the management has major league experience and our manager is a hall of famer. kinda cool to be driving around a hall of famer, a world series winner and others with considerable majors time.

tonight is a little on the cool side. lows are supposed to be in the 40’s but tomorrow it will be close to 80. any weather is baseball weather!!

until next time…

road trip/catch up

2009-04-15T08:58:00.000-07:00

i always enjoy going to jacksonville. it is always a trip where you have to find some humor or go insane.
the hotel we stay at is the hyatt on the st. johns river. beside the hotel, they have designated "bus parking only". never had a problem except for the margarita lime i found on the side of my bus last year, but, that is another story i believe i posted about.
anyway, we arrived in jacksonville wednesday night and i park in my usual parking spot. no problem, until saturday night.
after the game, i pulled up to the hotel, dropped off the players, and then went around the block to park. as i pull up, hotel security comes running up. she tells me i can't park here. here is the cliff's notes version of our conversation:

guard: sir, you can't park here.
me: why not?
guard: guests can't cross the road to get to the parking garage.
me: but that sign says "bus parking only".
guard: yes, i know. but you can't park here.
me: but the sign says "bus parking only".
guard: yes, i know. but you have to move or we will have your bus towed.
me: why do i have to move?
guard: because the guests can't get across the road to the parking garage.
me: okay, who came up with this?
guard: the hotel management.
me: let me get this right, "bus parking only" does not really mean bus parking?
guard: that's right.
me: ok, where do i park?
guard: up there in front of that police car.
me: you mean the one that has been parked in the no parking zone since we got here?
guard: yes, that is what i am saying.
me: so i am supposed to park in the "no parking zone-violators will be towed at owners expense", not where it says, legally, "bus parking only"?
guard: that's right.
me: last year, you told me i could not park there because i had designated parking that says "bus parking only" and that is the only spot i have to park.

at this point, she walked off. i parked (no parking spot) and went in to see the front desk manager. he and i have had known each other for 3 years and Michael is a very nice guy. i told him what happened. he laughed and told me if i did get ticketed, bring him the ticket and the hotel would take care of it. i had no problems from then on.

i got home about 0330, and i was tired. i unpacked, took a shower and had a quick snack. got to sleep about 0415. i set my alarm to get me up at 0630 so i could see my daughter and then take my son to school. i was planning on coming back home and sleeping until i went back to school to pick them up.
i got back home about 0845 and set my alarm for 1345. i put a note on my front door that read "do not disturb-i am sleeping" in case someone decided to come visit. my property is posted so unless i know you, yes, i can shoot your @ss and if i am tired enough, i might just do it. survivors will be shot again.

turkey season is open. about 1030, someone hunting in the field next to me must have seen a trophy. i woke up to a shotgun blast. i looked outside and he was about 100' from my bedroom window and was on his property. waking up to a shotgun blast will keep you up. i tried to lay down but my heart would not stop racing.

i decided to get up and finish my paperwork and i could not help but think about the trip and how good it was. we went 2-3 and for a road trip, that is not too bad. the players this year are hungry and they are playing well. i can't wait to see how they develop over this season. future posts will tell how it goes.
until next time...

back in the saddle again

2009-04-09T12:05:00.000-07:00

last thursday was my first day back to work after being off for almost 10 months. my knee still looks like a water balloon if i use it a lot but it still feels great to be back to work.
my first trip was to take a local college track and field team to gainesville, fl. it was a heck of a way to start back. 9 1/2 hours driving. i am really not complaining.
my second trip was to nashville to pick up the smokies, our "AA" affiliate of the chicago cubs. 2 days later, the 9th, we are in jacksonville, fl. it is so good to not only be back, but also that my boss has given me back my assignment to drive these guys for another season.
baseball is without a doubt, my favorite sport. sometimes, it creates conflict in my family. one daughter is aspiring to sing professionally and doing very well, my youngest daughter found her niche' in softball and her season is going well. her 2nd game, she hits her first homerun of the season. my son loves basketball and if it were a drink, he would drink it deep. my drink of choice is baseball.
the down side to this newly found euphoria, i miss my kids. i have 4 incredible children and i have been blessed greatly to have them.
recently, i decided to grow my hair long. in period of my past, i have had hair down my back and it seemed "cool". now, i have a different mission.
recently i was watching something from st. jude research hospital about kids and cancer and i was touched. my heart aches as i see these kids and hear their stories. i cry with the parents but i don't know (thankfully) their pain and i hope i never do. i can pray for these kids and trust God to heal them and i know in that i have some power. still, i am helpless. i found out that one of the most depressing things for girls is when they lose their hair. it is not the surgery or the chemo that hurts the most. it is losing all of their hair.
there is an organization called "locks of love" and they take hair, minimum 10" long, and make wigs for these kids. i know i can pray and it is effective for their healing, but what else can i do?
i decided that i can't give much money even though every little bit helps. but, i can grow my hair, have it cut off, and have a wig made for them and help them to feel better about themselves. it is a small thing, perhaps insignificant to most, but to them it is very significant.
this is not about me. this is not a "look at me" kinda thing. i think we have a responsibility as God's children to help others. "when you do it to the least of these..., you know the rest.
until next time...

fatter and lazier

2009-02-27T07:05:00.001-08:00

since i have been off, i have had the time to reflect on life and i am tired of just reflecting. my knee continues to give me problems. i finished a round of synvisc injections and it has not done much as far as helping my knee. if this continues, a total knee replacement may be the next step.
synvisc is supposed to be an amazing product. it is made from chicken combs. in other words, chicken fat!!! if there is medicinal value in chicken fat, i should be very healthy. i love fried chicken and all the trimmings. march 19 is my next dr. visit. if i am unable to drive this summer then i need to go on and get on anti-depressants. it depresses me greatly to think i might miss the 2009 baseball season. more than that, i miss going to dc.
i love dc and i have posted many times about my trips there. dc is an amazing place to go to. the highlight of my dc trips are the memorials and arlington. on "the wall" is the name of a neighbor of mine from my hometown, jackson, tennessee.
i remember being home the day military officers came to my next door neighbors house. my neighbor had stepped on a landmine in vietnam and had been killed. i can close my eyes and see it so vividly. they knocked on the door and when they got no answer, they knocked on our door to inquire as to where his parents could be found. when these guys come around, you know what has happened. as i write about this, i still get that knot in my stomach and the lump in my throat.
recently restrictions have been lifted as to the media covering the return of our war dead. i have always felt we should do all we can to remember those who gave their lives while serving in our militaries. i guess reading about this is what started all these memories to surface.
bottom line-whether or not you agree with war, real people die. our neighbors, friends, relatives and their families lose a loved one and it is unfortunate that they have to suffer so much pain. they volunteered to serve our country but i don't believe one of them volunteered to die. but they do.
today, take the time to pray for these people. as i write this, over 4100 men and women have died in iraq and afghanistan. they all left behind someone who loved them. they are grieving and hurting. some are angry. some mourn the loss and become depressed. all need to be prayed over and it is not only the least we can do, it is the most.
God bless them all and God bless our great nation.
until next time...

what idiot started the "winter holiday" crap?

2008-12-11T17:57:00.000-08:00

a dear friend in maryland sent me this in an email a few days ago. i thought it was worth posting. i could not have said it any better.

Twas the month before Christmas

When all through our land,

Not a Christian was praying

Nor taking a stand.

See the PC Police had taken away,

The reason for Christmas - no one could say.

The children were told by their schools not to sing,

About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.

It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say

December 25th is just a 'Holiday'.

Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit

Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!

CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod

Something was changing, something quite odd!

Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa

In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.

At Target were hanging their trees upside down

At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.

At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears

You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.

Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty

Are words that were used to intimidate me.

Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen

On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton!

At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter

To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.

And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith

Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace

The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded

The reason for the season, stopped before it started.

So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'

Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.

Choose your words carefully, choose what you say

Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS ,

not Happy Holiday!

Please, all Christians join together and

wish everyone you meet

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Christ is The Reason for the Christ-mas Season!

until next time...

where did fall go?

2008-12-08T08:13:00.000-08:00

today is december 8 and i am looking out my window at the woods. it seems like yesterday the temperature was in the 80's and the foliage was still green. now, it is gone. we went from summer straight into winter.
i am still off work. last week i had some problems with my knee and my doctor put me back on workmans comp. i am so blessed to live where i live. when the kids are in school, it is very quiet here. if i were a professional writer, it would be a great place to just sit and write. but, i am not.
the last date i worked was june 30th. i have been off more than 5 months. i jokingly told someone that i could have had a heart attack, bypass surgery and rehab and been back to work!!! i checked and found out i was right. oh well.
so much history has been made since i have been off. the depression (or recession), the stock market, the presidential election, foreclosures, "the big 3" and all of the bailouts. it has been quite a year and it is not over yet. we will see more businesses go belly up and more people losing their jobs and homes. it is a sad time in our country.
lee iacocca has a new book entitled "where have all the leaders gone". i have been a fan of his since he was ceo of chrysler. he is straight forward and his approach to leadership i greatly admire. here are some excerpts form his new book. i apologize for the language.

'Am I the only guy in this country who's fed up with what's

happening? Where the hell is our outrage? We should be screaming

bloody murder. We've got a gang of clueless bozos steering our ship

of state right over a cliff, we've got corporate gangsters stealing

us blind, and we can't even clean up after a hurricane much less

build a hybrid car. But instead of getting mad, everyone sits around

and nods their heads when the politicians say, 'Stay the course.'

Stay the course? You've got to be kidding. This is America , not the

damned 'Titanic'. I'll give you a sound bite: 'Throw all the bums

out!'

You might think I'm getting senile, that I've gone off my rocker, and

maybe I have. But someone has to speak up. I hardly recognize this

country anymore.

The most famous business leaders are not the innovators but the guys

in handcuffs. While we're fiddling in Iraq , the Middle East is

burning and nobody seems to know what to do. And the press is waving

'pom-poms' instead of asking hard questions. That's not the promise

of the ' America ' my parents and yours traveled across the ocean for.

I've had enough. How about you?

I'll go a step further. You can't call yourself a patriot if you're

not outraged. This is a fight I'm ready and willing to have. The

Biggest 'C' is Crisis ! (Iacocca elaborates on nine C's of

leadership, with crisis being the first.)

Leaders are made, not born. Leadership is forged in times of crisis.

It's easy to sit there with your feet up on the desk and talk theory.

Or send someone else's kids off to war when you've never seen a

battlefield yourself. It's another thing to lead when your world

comes tumbling down.

On September 11, 2001, we needed a strong leader more than any other

time in our history. We needed a steady hand to guide us out of the

ashes. A hell of a mess so here's where we stand.

We're immersed in a bloody war with no plan for winning and no plan

for leaving.

We're running the biggest deficit in the history of the country.

We're losing the manufacturing edge to Asia , while our once-great

companies are getting slaughtered by health care costs.

Gas prices are skyrocketing, and nobody in power has a coherent

energy policy. Our schools are in trouble.

Our borders are like sieves.

The middle class is being squeezed every which way.

These are times that cry out for leadership.

But when you look around, you've got to ask: 'Where have all the

leaders gone?' Where are the curious, creative communicators? Where

are the people of character, courage, conviction, omnipotence, and

common sense? I may be a sucker for alliteration, but I think you get

the point.

Name me a leader who has a better idea for homeland security than

making us take off our shoes in airports and throw away our shampoo?

We've spent billions of dolla rs building a huge new bureaucracy, and

all we know how to do is react to things that have already happened.

Name me one leader who emerged from the crisis of Hurricane Katrina.

Congress has yet to spend a single day evaluating the response to the

hurricane or demanding accountability for the decisions that were

made in the crucial hours after the storm.

Everyone's hunkering down, fingers crossed, hoping it doesn't happen

again. Now, that's just crazy. Storms happen. Deal with it. Make a

plan. Figure out what you're going to do the next time.

Name me an industry leader who is thinking creatively about how we

can restore our competitive edge in manufacturing. Who would have

believed that there could ever be a time when 'The Big Three' referred

to Japanese car companies? How did this happen, and more important,

what are we going to do about it?

Name me a government leader who can articulate a plan for paying down

the debit, or solving the energy crisis, or managing the health care

problem. The silence is deafening. But these are the crises that are

eating away at our country and milking the middle class dry.

I have news for the gang in Congress. We didn't elect you to sit on

your asses and do nothing and remain silent while our democracy is

being hijacked and our greatness is being replaced with mediocrity.

What is everybody so afraid of? That some bonehead on Fox News

<http://www.foxnews.com/> will call them a name? Give me a break.

Why don't you guys show some spine for a &nb sp;change?

Had Enough? Hey, I'm not trying to be the voice of gloom and doom

here. I'm trying to light a fire. I'm speaking out because I have

hope - I believe in America . In my lifetime, I've had the privilege

of living through some of America 's greatest moments. I've also

experienced some of our worst crises: The 'Great Depression,' 'World

War II,' the 'Korean War,' the 'Kennedy Assassination,' the 'Vietnam

War,' the 1970's oil crisis, and the struggles of recent years

culminating with 9/11.

If I've learned one thing, it's this: 'You don't get anywhere by

standing on the sidelines waiting for somebody else to take action.

Whether it's building a better car or building a better future for

our children, we all have a role to play. That's the challenge I'm

raising in this book. It's a call to 'Action for people who, like me,

believe in America '. It's not too late, but it's getting pretty

close. So let' s shake off the crap and go to work. Let's tell 'em

all we've had 'enough.'

Make your own contribution by sending this to everyone you know and

care about. It's our country, folks, and it's our future. Our future

is at stake!!

until next time...

hi, billy mays here

2008-08-29T10:53:00.000-07:00

this has to be the funniest story i have heard in a long time. i was doing some research for an article i was writing for a business publication. first, let me confess, i love billy mays and i love ron popeil. these two are absolute geniuses as far as marketing goes, love'em or hate'em, they are very effective marketers and you can't argue with their successes. i wish i had 1/10th their genius but that is another story.
as i said i was doing some research and here is a story i uncovered. i can't add anything else to this as it speaks for itself!!!

Christian Peace Activists Rescued by Billy Mays
By Buckner Wheat
Mar 25, 2006, 07:31

"But wait! There's more!"

BAGHDAD – The dramatic rescue of three Christian peace activists by U.S. and British forces on Thursday was made possible by the deployment of psychological weaponry that promises to end the rash of kidnappings impeding the spread of democracy in Iraq.

The activists—James Loney and Harmeet Singh Sooden of Canada and Norman Kember of England—were kidnapped on November 26, 2005, while driving to meet with Sunni Arab leaders. The men were held hostage at a compound on the outskirts of Baghdad.

"We were at the end of our rope," reported Maj. Gen. Rick Lynch. "We really did fear that each one would be killed eventually—until we discovered a new secret weapon. ”

Maj. Gen. Lynch smiled and opened a sound file on a nearby laptop.

"Hi! Billy Mays here for Oxy-Clean!" screamed a grating voice.

"Every time one of that guy's commercials comes on, my immediate response is to hit the fast-forward on my TIVO as quickly as I can," said Maj. Gen. Lynch. "Whether he's selling OxiClean, OrangeGlo, or Kaboom, his voice literally makes me want to put a knife through my eye socket to end the torture. That's how I got the idea to utilize his commercials as an effective weapon."

Maj. Gen. Lynch explained how the new weapon was used to thwart an attack by sixty gunmen on a police station near Baghdad two weeks ago.

"After a three-hour gun battle, we saw that we weren't making any progress. So we tried broadcasting the Oxy-Clean commercial at mega-watt volume from our command center."

Immediately, all sixty insurgents began running around in circles, bewildered and terrorized, pleading for the painful tirade to cease.

"We ended up catching fifty of 'em in the crossfire," said Maj. Gen. Lynch. "It was pretty cool."

Apparently, continued exposure to Mays' shrill, piercing voice at levels in excess of 125 decibels results in nausea, vomiting, acute diarrhea, convulsions, and death among certain non-native speakers of English.

According to British foreign secretary, Jack Straw, Thursday’s military rescue followed "weeks and weeks of very careful work by military and coalition personnel in Iraq, and many civilians as well."

"We had been working on this rescue for four months to no avail," added Maj. Gen. Lynch. "But after five minutes of blaring Billy Mays' voice into the compound, we could hear blood-curdling screams of 'Shi-Kabbalah, Shi-Kabbalah' coming from inside."

Fortunately, Sergeant Dan Henderson, a member of the rescue team, is fluent in colloquial Arabic.

"Basically, 'Shi-Kabbalah' is a local slang term for diarrhea," said Sergeant Henderson. "It's tough to translate, but, roughly, it means 'shish kebabs-on-tap.' Once I heard that, it was pretty clear that the kidnappers would be occupied for a while, and I told Maj. Gen. Lynch we should make our move."

"As expected, the captives were found unguarded, their kidnappers having vanished," reported Maj. Gen. Lynch. "Billy Mays’ voice could be the key to turning this war on terrorism completely around. Its applications are boundless. This is the kind of good news from Iraq the press ought to be reporting."

until next time...

the school shooting

2008-08-21T08:39:00.000-07:00

i had just dropped off my son at school. as i was driving home i turned on the radio and there was a breaking news story. in one of our local high schools a student had been shot. this particular high school, central high school, is located in the north part of knoxville. just after bill gentry hired me in october of 2006, he asked me to drive a special trip for him. it was taking his daughter and one of her classes to atlanta. since then, i have driven many trips for this school, so this event has some special interest to me.
at appx 8:11 this morning, a person shot a 16 year old student in the cafeteria. about 2 hours later, it was announced that ryan mcdonald, a freshman at central high school had died. the response of law enforcement was rapid. the 911 call came in at 8:11am, police arrived at the school 2 minutes later and at 8:17 a subject was in custody arrested several blocks away.
as i was keeping up with this story, i wondered if either of these students had been on one of my buses? had i met them? sometimes my children have been on trips with me . have my children ever seen them? i was processing this from my own perspective and it had become a selfish thought process.
every morning when i take a shower, i pray. it is one of those few times during the day where i am able to be in the quiet and i can pray and meditate. as i was praying, God clearly showed me this was not about me. this morning 2 kids left their homes. 1 will not be going back and chances are the other one will never be going home either. 2 sets of parents are hurting and grieving. both have lost a son. probably a sibling has lost a brother. either way you look at it, this is a horrible tragedy.
i have always heard the worst loss a person can have is the death of a child. i pray i will never know this pain. i was able to witness this 8 years ago when my older brother died. my parents grieved and it hurt me so badly to see my parents hurt like this and there was little i could do. i can't relate to this and not many parents can. 2 years later my father died and i can almost say with certainty that he grieved himself to death. he was never the same. my mother is still alive but she too, is not the same.
this story is one that so very wrong and tragic. it is so true and i wish it weren't. i don't know what to do other than pray and hold my children a little tighter and tell them i love them one more time. we can't keep our children from living life and we can't shield them from it either. but i often think about keeping them home and never leaving.
i have 4 wonderful children and i love them equally with all my heart. i recognize the equal love but as with most families we have different relationships with our children as the all have differing personalities. i wish they were all here so i could squeeze them and tell them i love them. i remember a commercial many years ago that featured paul"bear" bryant. he was plugging coke and it was mothers day weekend. his line was "don't forget to call your mom. i sure wish i could call mine" (his had passed away).
sometimes we have disagreements with our family and we don't tell them we love them nearly enough especially when we have been arguing and and one leaves to go somewhere.
what happened this morning and the details of their morning we may never know. where "i love yous" exchanged as these parents say their kids off to school?
i don't know and probably never will. what i do know is i will never allow a loved one to leave my presence without telling them i love them. it may be the last chance i get.
don't forget to tell your loved ones you love them. 2 parents may never get that chance again.
until next time...

on the dl

2008-08-20T09:13:00.000-07:00

in baseball terms, i am on the disabled list. 4 days after my last post, i was in the baggage compartment of my bus loading some of the players bags. i was squatting and turned to my left. my body twisted but my right foot did not. i crushed the cartilage and the doctor took me off the road. the prognosis is surgery to repair or replace the medial meniscus, drain fluid, remove bone spurs and repair some other damage due to arthritis.
workman's comp has been an experience. while i feel fortunate to work for an employer who pays into workman's comp, it has been hard to survive on about 1/3 of my regular pay. don't get me wrong, i am not whining. the insurance company has been absolutely phenomenal with the service they have given me. lisa, earnestine and sheila have been professional and after a while it became personal. (no, not like that!!!)
my surgery date is september 5th and i am actually looking forward to it. my doctor is dr. paul naylor and i have been a patient of his for almost 12 years. he is an incredible doctor as well as a person. he is the kind of doc that if you have an appointment at 10:30, you are seeing him at 10:30. very rare these days. i trust him to the point that if he told me he had to cut off my ears to make my knee better i would not question it. probably a bad analogy but you get the point.
long story to get to the point. during this time, i spent a week with my 15 year old. her mother moved many years ago to franklin and i miss seeing her so much. it is so good to spend time with her. my 2 youngest started school and my son made the move up to middle school. i cried the first day of school. i dropped him off and he was so big and mature acting. i realized he is not a little boy anymore. he has adjusted well to such a big change. he and his sister have never been separated as far as school goes and it turns out it was harder on me than it was on them. if i had been working, i would have missed all of that experience. as far as my youngest daughter, it was like she had no summer break. next year may be different as she moves up to middle school. being off has enabled me to experience all of this as well as my spiritual side. sometimes in life at best we acknowledge God. slowing down like this has allowed me to "waller" in the spirit and meditate. it has gotten to the point i am thanking God for the injury. living where i live the only distractions i have is getting out to school or the store. other than that, God's creation has become more "personal". i have been able to reflect on how big yet personal he is. genesis 1:1 has become more real and tangible. he did a pretty incredible job!!! just thinking about how big "the heavens and the earth" are then realizing he knows how many hairs i have on my head is kinda cool!!!
i would not recommend an injury just to grow in your spiritual life. but if that is what it will take for me to experience the things i have, i pray for another one. soon!!!
until next time...

are they really missing anything?

2008-06-25T08:45:00.000-07:00

i love the sounds at the ballpark. there are very distinct sounds and smells that take me back to my own youth. the crowds yelling at a play made well, the long ball, the ball smacking the pocket of the glove. the most recognizable sound is the ball coming off the bat with the unmistakable "crack". wood bats are made from a variety of hardwoods. all produce a different "crack" and some aficionados can even tell you what kind of wood a bat is just by that sound. my ears are not that trained but i can tell you this-metal bats ain't even close.
at this ballpark, there is a couple who work in the clubhouse. he is completely deaf and at best his wife is very hard of hearing. both have cell phones but i guess that is another story. they sign and seem to communicate well with each other as well as with the non-hearing impaired.
i had just gotten off the phone with family back home. i am sitting at a picnic table, watching a good game, and just enjoying being outdoors on a nice night. the small crowd was doing their best to provide some noise. this couple was there and they were gesturing to each other with each play. it was then that i realized we are watching the same game but hearing it differently.
i can't relate to living in a silent world. some hearing loss in one ear is as close as i can get. theirs is totally silent. they will never hear the "crack" nor the crowd. one of the sweetest sounds, your own child crying for the first time, they will never hear. no "i love yous". just silence. do you really "hear" silence? i started to feel some emotion over all they are missing. i sat there trying not to make my observations so obvious. as i watched, they appeared to enjoy the game more than i was!!! so, are they really missing anything? all their other senses more acute? i don't know.
i have seen them on many occasions. they silently go about their tasks with meticulous attention. they are almost always smiling and wave to me when they see me. society may look at their "handicap" but are they really "handicapped".
as i watched them i want to believe, have to, that they are living a "normal", healthy life just as i am. seeing their gestures and their faces, are they really missing anything? if they never heard, how would they know what they are missing?
most of us go through our lives with all of our senses intact and never hear what those closest to us are saying. our friends and family try to communicate with us but we miss it. here are 2 people, that i came to see aren't missing anything.
until next time...

me, God and catch-up

2008-06-24T16:32:00.000-07:00

i am at church and it is the beginning our vacation bible school. it is really cool to see the kids grow and learn. there are so many tools now to reach kids. as a friend of mine said, teach them how they learn. kids today are exposed to so much negative that it is a wonder anything positive gets in.

so much has happened since my last post. the last time i posted i was in birmingham and i wrote about a little boy i met named Solomon. here we are, june 23^rd and there is so much to catch up on.

baseball has been baseball. this season is the opposite of last year as far as our season is going. we are about 15 games below .500 compared to being tied for 1^st like we were last year. the season is about ½ over so there is a lot more to go.

all of my baseball trips have been good. there is a new management team this year and it has taken me a while to get them trained!!! lots of new faces. about a 50/50 mix of old faces returning.

in between baseball i have been enjoying my other trips. one thing i have been really bummed about is i have not been to d.c. at all. by now i would have been at least 3 times. there is something that i miss about the whole d.c. experience, especially Arlington. it is such a sacred place and i am missing it. i sat down a few nights ago and watched the video by trace adkins “Arlington” and was joined by my son. sometimes when we do things with our children we wonder how much attention they really pay. as we watched the video, he asked me to play it again. as it replayed he started with “remember when we went” and he started naming specific things he saw. i was surprised at how much detail he went into. the moment was as special as when we went there last year.

last week i was in pearl ms. and i had a moment that was one of those special “God moments” that i have blogged about previously. a week before, i was coming back from nashville and i had another experience that was a preface to this one. i had dropped off a group at their hotel and was empty going home. me and 57 empty seats. i stopped at a truck stop with a subway and got me something to eat. i had no place to be anytime soon so this was a leisurely trip home. earlier i had a breakdown and had to get a replacement bus. it had been a hard 3 days with this group. 14-18 hour days and it was a relief to get some “me” time. as i age, “me” time has become more important and when i can get it i soak it all in. it was about 2am and the moon was just coming up over the horizon. it was so large and orange and bright. as i was taking it all in, i started to get a lonely feeling. i have no wife and my son lives with me. even though i am quite happy with my life, sometimes i miss not having someone to share it with. as I am rolling along on cruise control, i started thinking about this and it was if i had been smacked. it wasn’t that i needed someone to share this special moment with. it was not about me and what i did not have or think what i was lacking. after a few moments of pity party time, God revealed to me that it was our time and he wanted me to see something truly spectacular!!! it became a time that i did not need a person to see the moon with. i was spending time with the one who created it!!! how cool is that!!!

now, back to pearl ms. it was a Sunday morning and we were rushing to get to the field. our “get away” days can be quite hectic and fast paced. our host hotel is located in flowood beside and across from a string of small lakes. there in front of me was a flock of geese (see earlier posts on geese) crossing the road. not flying, walking. i had to stop (chose to) while they crossed and they took their time. as i watched it became obvious it was another one of those times God is telling me to slow down and watch something. and i did. usually some of the players grumble if we get slowed down. not this time. there was silence. it was so cool. and then last night at Church. our class was meeting in the lobby and our lobby is surrounded by glass. we were discussing 1^st Corinthians and the contrasts that are outlined in the 2^nd chapter. as we discussed this a quick storm blew in with lots of thunder, lightning and rain. as it was passing, the smaller children could be heard screaming when there was a clap of thunder. coupled with several emergency vehicles going by and you start to get the picture. I looked out the window and there was one of the most beautiful rainbows I have seen in a while. the contrasts were quite parallel. on one side of me there was the screams of fear. behind me were the emergency vehicles with blaring sirens. so much chaos to get caught up in. and then i turn away from the chaos and distractions and i see the rainbow. after class i was driving home with my son and nephew, we followed the rainbow home.

as i get older, i think about my own mortality and come to the sobering thought that age wise, most of my life is behind me. as i stop and see rainbows, orange moons and geese crossing, i have come to realize i have only started living. tomorrow may be my last. based on what i have been seeing and experiencing, it still feels like only the best is just beginning.

until the next time… if there is

solomon's birthday

2008-04-07T14:26:00.000-07:00

i normally try to keep my blogs in some kind of order just to make sense. there have been so many trips this year and i am trying to sort them out so i can blog about them. i felt the need to post this while the memories were still there.
at ballparks, they will flash your child's name on the media board during the game if it is their birthday. i noticed one name that stuck in my mind more than the others. it was solomon.
for those of you who read scripture, solomon was the son of david and bathsheba. solomon asked God for wisdom above all else-no riches, no vast populus to govern-just wisdom. and God gave him that wisdom and then he blessed him with great wealth. perhaps a lesson for all of us. anyway, i remembered his name for that reason-well, that and my son's name is isaac.
after the game, i noticed a young man walking with his mom to their car. actually i was blocking her in. we talked for a minute and she asked me if he could get some autographs. i said i would be happy to help if i could. when the first player came out to get on the bus, i noticed on the back of his hat was a name-solomon. i remembered the name flashing on the board and being the mensa member i am, it hit me that this was the birthday solomon. cute kid. as each player came out to get on the bus, he would look at me and i would nod a "yes" to let him know this was a player.
the reason i guess this affected me the way it did is because i was missing my own children and i have an unhealthy attachment to baseball. but that is not all.
it was sunday and this mom brought her son to a baseball game (she gets my vote) on a day most stay home and do family stuff, or church related things. to see thru his eyes for a few moments took me back to my childhood and all of my memories of the sight and smells of the parks i went to. the hot dogs, popcorn, hamburgers, cotton candy and sour apple and grape bubble gum. it was a time in my life where i could have taken a wrong turn and ended up choosing to do wrong and not do right. i chose to stay reasonably out of trouble and for the most part i have always landed on my feet despite falling far and often. and here is solomon-wide eyed wonder. not really aware of the fact that as these players develop, one day he will see some playing in the major leagues. and that is ok if he never sees it. for right now, it was mom, baseball, a birthday and some really tall guys who signed their names on a piece of paper. the innocence is something our children lose so quickly these days. i was privileged to be a small part of a day in the life of solomon. thanks for the memories. happy birthday.
until next time...

quantico x2

2008-04-05T08:25:00.000-07:00

i love our country. i have a respect and admiration for the military that runs deep. transporting troops is a high honor for me.
recently i got to take a group of marines to quantico for training and i got to go back 2 weeks later to pick them up. this facility is eerie cool. the times i have been there, i have not seen anyone training. i heard them, never saw them. driving along these winding roads is quiet. then, you hear bursts of small arms fire. like i said, never saw them but they were there.
both trips were night drives. got to know the 2 leaders and these guys were always respectful. i would have expected no less from a marine. but these guys were also down to earth guys with families back home just like me. they were both married and had regular jobs. when we were coming home, i found out they were going back to their families for a while and then on to california before being deployed to iraq. for some this will be their second deployment. for some it is their third. they do what i don't have the guts to do. they are human just like me but that is about all. the work they do and the commitment with which they serve is nothing short of amazing. after dropping them off and the trip was over i prayed for them to return safely. the 2 leaders, Matt and Brandon are very capable leaders. they are the kind of guys a mother would trust their son or daughter to serve under knowing they will do all they can to bring them home safely. all this sounds good and patriotic and gives a feel good warmth. then, i remember my 10 year old wants to be a marine and serve his country. this now really hits home and it scares the hell out of me. sometimes i just sit and stare at my children. i want to soak it in as long as i can. there are times our children seem like the anti-christ and times you can see the halo and wings on their backs. to think of my son or any of my children serving our country, well, my chest swells real big. when i think of the reality that one day they may go to a war, i shrivel up with fear. and i put on the mask of denial. if my loved ones want to serve, i know i can't stop them. if they don't, i can't make them it is their decision. i hope they do. i hope they don't. if they do i can only hope the leadership is of the same caliber of Matt and Brandon. and if they read this blog, remember those you lead were kids at one time just like your own who wait for you back home. i also know that they and you will come home safely because of your leadership. as a parent, thanks. as an American, i am privileged to have met you. i pray for you and all those who serve. God Bless you.
until next time...

transportation day

2008-04-05T07:59:00.000-07:00

today i had the pleasure of participating in transportation day at what i thought was "just another elementary" school. i knew little about this school. to be honest, i never knew it existed until i went there.
when i got there, i was told where to park and the students would be coming out in small groups. so, i sat and after a while they started coming out. for those of you who know me, i love children no matter the age, race, or whatever. grown-ups shed their innocence and kids (most) still have that wide eyed wonder about everything. these kids were no different. or so i thought. here is something i copied/pasted from the school website (name deleted):

" (deleted) School is unique in that it serves children throughout Knox County. The majority of students attending (deleted) School are eligible to receive special education services. Most of the students attending (deleted) School are preschool age (three through five years old) and participate in a partial day program. Additionally, there is one Comprehensive Development Classroom-Activities Based (CDC-A) serving school aged students (six through twenty-two years old). This CDC-A class serves multi-handicapped, medically fragile children whose needs are best met in a specialized setting.

as they came out, there were smiles and they look in their eyes i can't describe. when they got on the coach, they were all eyes and they sat at appeared to soak it all in. there are times when i spend time around special needs children, i usually end up sad and sometimes i weep when i think of all they will miss in life. i know that is the narrow mindedness in which i sometimes look thru. at times i weep tears of sadness. this was different. as i said, the look in their eyes was different. they took it all in. they were not sad. they were happy and i was too. what started out as a p.r. day turned into a day i will never forget. i went to show them one of our new coaches. they ended up teaching me to never stop looking at life with wonder and excitement. sometimes the teacher gets taught. sometimes the leader needs leading. today, i was changed thru the eyes of these little angels. ashley, thanks.
until next time...

mission of hope

2008-01-18T08:21:00.001-08:00

for those of you unfamiliar with the mission of hope, it is an organization that reaches thousands of people in parts of tennessee and kentucky applachians. these people are among the poorest of the poor in our nation. the people i have personally come in contact are a wonderful group and they live in conditions most of us turn our noses up at. they tend to provide for their families below poverty levels and most have little or no means of support. there are no jobs in these "wilderness" type areas. they are born here, live here and die here. i would guess alot of them never leave the area and probably never will.
my trip to harlan county, ky. was a cold day. we left about 0630 and arrived about 0900. the roads at best are paved? and narrow. it is a tight fit in a 45' coach. most of the roads both the left and right sides of my bus were over the lines.
we pulled up to a school that was k-8 and even with 9 grades it was small. the road was so narrow, i literally had to drive back into "town" just to turn around so i could get back in the parking lot. once parked, i headed back into the school. as i was walking down the sidewalk in front of the school, i noticed a deer leg laying on the ground. what a contrast to my "comfy" world. here at home, if someone found a deer leg they would call 911 for a hazmat crew to come and clean it up. probably become a superfund site!!! but here, it was accepted.
i walked into the gym and saw table after table with covered up toys for all the kids in this school. the group i took there was from Christ Covenant Church in knoxville. long story short, after a skit, it was time for the kids to go "shopping". i was taken back as i stood there and this kid, about 11 or 12 with red, curly hair came up to me and hugged me. he said "thanks for coming up here and what you do. Merry Christmas". i said "Merry Christmas" and off he went to sit with his classmates. a few minutes later, thru the view finder of my video camera, i spotted a boy who has his head "buzzed". next to him sat his brother who had no hair due to chemo. the look in their eyes was one of emptiness. i had to get some fresh air.
after i composed myself, the kids screamed with joy when the tarps covering their gifts was removed.
i remember child after child asking if they could get one more gift for their little brother or sister. they were allowed 2 gifts each. i also remember those who got one gift for themselves and another for a brother or sister.
after we cleaned up and ate, the leaders were given a large stack of thank you notes from the kids. one in particular came from a girl named "amber" (name changed). her note said she 11 and she told of it being a hard year for her mom. her dad had died earlier in the year and sometimes they had no food. the only money her mother got was a check from the government. she told of her brother who could not puts words together to make a sentence. then it hit me-she was thanking us for her Christmas because that was all she was going to get. on the bus, the leader talked about the fact that if not for the mission of hope there would be no Christmas for most of these kids.
i flashed back to my own youth. Christmas coming, making out a list, go see santa claus, and then waiting for Christmas eve. growing up, Christmas was almost magical. the anticipation of all those gifts was enough to always be on my best behavior. getting to open them was a time of intensiveness i can't describe. these kids have and will not experience that. santa was not real and never had been. there was no fantasy here. only reality. and their reality was a very harsh one.
God Bless the works of the mission of hope and all they do. this is only one facet of the works these volunteers do. for more information, go to www.missionofhope.org.
my life was made different that day. i will do it again without having to think about it. my heart was changed as was my outlook. giving is truly a joy.
until next time...

washington my way

2007-11-06T17:37:00.000-08:00

i love washington. i guess it is obvious from my earlier posts. this trip started off like any other. very simple-pick up a school group and take them to d.c. things changed quickly. it started off by me being one hour late to pick them up. the directions given me were wrong and the incorrect directions were supported by my gps. when i picked them up, i apologized profusely and i realized then that this was going to be a great trip. i asked if they had an agenda and the leader said no. they knew where they wanted to go but after that it was pretty much up to spontaneity and traffic.
we saw and did so much in 2 full days. we hit the ground running about 1000 and we would get back to the hotel around midnight. seeing d.c. at night is almost as cool as seeing it during daylight. our last night, we went on a dinner cruise on "the spirit of mt. vernon" and it was very nice. the kids (and adults ate and danced and had a good time. while they were inside, i had the chance to go outside and enjoy the downtown lights from the potomac. we went by reagan national. the planes came right over the ship and when they landed, it looked they were landing in the water. so cool.
we got to go to Arlington National Cemetery and yes, i cried. i always do. whenever i go, i always have an agenda. this time it was section 60. that is where the casualties from iraq/afghanistan are laid to rest. it is very sobering to walk around and see the birthdates of these heroes who gave their lives for you and me. the ones who were born in '85, '86, 87 really got to me. i have a 20 year old daughter whom i love very much. i can remember when she was born, were i was in my life, where i was working, etc. some of these heroes were born around that time and as i think of her and the joy of my firstborn and i know the parents of these people felt the same things i did. where we are today is very different.
i am proud of my children. they are the joy in my life that i desire most right after my relationship with Christ. i look forward to seeing them, touching them and being with them. i ache at times because they are not near enough.
the parents of these kids are proud of them. the difference is mine are here and theirs are not. no more hugs, phone calls or visits. i can not imagine their pain. i pray for them. i pray for their lost one (s). i am grateful for all their loved ones did for me and you. and if it really matters, i grieve with them. when i am at Arlington i am aware that these men and women don't get visited often enough. it is an honor to go and be with them, pray over them, and even talk to them. i don't know anything other than what the headstone says. one day, i will see them and have the pleasure of shaking their hand.
what an honor that will be.
until next time...

long day, big win

2007-10-30T18:14:00.001-07:00

high school band competitions are becoming amazing productions. i had a weekend trip that took a large high school band from kingsport to murfreesboro. my day started by leaving home at 0400. i arrived in kingsport at 0700 and then drove to murfreesboro. all told, about 365 miles. we arrived about 1230 and we did not leave for another 12 hours. here is some info for you to think about:
* this is the largest high school band in tennessee-285 in the competition band and over 400 in the football band. there are only about 2000 students in the whole school. that means about 1 in 5 students are in the band.
* they are larger than the university of tennessee pride of the southland marching band.

* this was a "lite" trip-7 buses, 1 tractor trailer, another trailer pulled by a truck and appx 25 chaperone's and helpers.

* they travel extensively- they have played at the macy's thanksgiving day parade, tournament of roses parade and countless other programs.

* they are extremely talented, gifted and well led.

this group was a typical group who travels alot-polite but not really outgoing-until you got to know them. once they all got used to me, they were very polite and respectful. they were a fun group and very disciplined. watching them warm up was impressive. seeing them perform with such precision was inspiring. during their finals performance, there was a bassoon solo. bassoons are not your typical marching band instrument so it had to be "miked". it was so soft and such a pretty piece of music. it was the kind of piece that while he was starting, people stopped what they were doing just to listen. when they finished, they were shown what i think was ultimate respect-kids from other schools gave them a standing ovation!!! it was really cool to witness this event.
it was the kind of trip i ended up thanking them for allowing me to be a part of. it was a memorable experience and i am grateful i had they chance to not only meet some respectful and talented kids, it was a pleasure to meet so many chaperone's and parents who make all of this happen. without them, at best this would have been "organized chaos" at it's finest. by they way, they "earned" second place and the governors trophy!!!

until next time...

Navy SEAL Lt. Michael Murphy

2007-10-26T13:22:00.000-07:00

i don't often write about individuals. most are about group or team players coming together for a win. in this case it is about one person.
Lt. Murphy was killed in afghanistan in june 2005. recently he was awarded the medal of honor, the highest medal given to anyone in the military. i went to the army's website to copy/paste a copy of the citation but it was not there.
why is this so important?
Lt. Murphy is the first medal of honor recipient killed in afghanistan. his honoring was propaganda on cnn, msnbc and cnbc. he did not receive any attention above the fold or below the fold in the new york times. fox news was the only one to give it a fair shake.
in researching this, here are some comments posted:

"Michael wasn't into medals and calling attention to himself," Daniel Murphy said. "But all these people are saying Michael's actions are so special he deserves the Medal of Honor."

Murphy, who was 29, was killed in a fierce firefight in mountainous terrain along the Afghanistan-Pakistan border. He led a four-man special reconnaissance unit that was secreted into the Hindu Kush mountains along the border in June 2005.

The unit was reported to be trailing a high-ranking terror leader near 10,000-foot peaks when they were ambushed and overrun by scores of insurgent fighters on June 28, according to Newsday interviews and media reports. The newspaper Navy Times reported in October that Murphy's actions -- "far outnumbered and surrounded by enemy" -- were being reviewed for the U.S. Navy's first Medal of Honor awarded since the Vietnam War.

A troop transport helicopter that sped to their rescue with eight Navy SEALs and eight Army commandos aboard crashed after being hit by a rocket-propelled grenade. All aboard were killed. A single member of Murphy's team managed to elude capture, and eventually was reunited with U.S. forces.

Relatives of the SEALS have said the lone American survivor told them that Murphy came to his rescue when he was trapped by insurgents during the battle, according to the interviews and reports.

The survivor also told relatives that Murphy was shot when he climbed to higher ground and into the open to send an electronic call for help. Wounded, Murphy completed the call, then continued fighting. It is this action that is believed to be at the heart of his consideration for the Medal of Honor.
navyseals.com website

"At a White House ceremony Monday, Navy SEAL Michael Murphy's family received the Medal of Honor. The sacrifice Lt. Murphy made epitomizes the best of America, and that's why we are leading with the story.
billoreilly.com

of other notes, bill maher was heckled by far left wing extremists live on his hbo program. this received more attention than the medal of honor ceremony.

in Arlington National Cemetery, over 300,000 brave men and women are buried. as you enter, there is a sign reminding you that these are sacred grounds. i do not know where Lt. Murphy was laid to rest. i do know this, it is sacred as well.
i am adding a link to the Arlington website that features the video of trace adkins haunting song, "arlington". take a moment and listen.
http://www.arlingtoncemetery.net/memorial-day-2006-video.htm

Lt.Murphy was a hero. he was my neighbor and yours. he was the kid up the street. he was an american. just like you and me.

never forget those who give, and gave, their lives for this country. mrs. murphy, god bless you and your children.

until next time...

whirlwind tour of the eastern u.s.

2007-10-24T09:17:00.000-07:00

i love my job and i love my life. at times, i don't know where i will be the next day. i have the privilege of transporting anybody from young school-aged kids to our military. i go from large cities to cities that are not even on some of the best maps you can buy. i drive on roads 10 lanes wide and i drive on back country roads that require some "creative" maneuvering. this past week, i left on a tuesday about 1730 and drove to chattanooga, about 1 1/2 hours south. i picked up a group that was going to washington, dc. i was relaying them to another driver who was waiting about 2 hours south of dc. the lady who is the tour director, joy, is one of my favorite people. due to her personality and experience, all of her trips are well planned and executed. we left chattanooga about 2030 and arrived in raphine, va. about 0315. from there the other driver would take them the rest of the way. i was going to bed.
about 1100, i left raphine and headed home, about 325 miles south. i got to my office about 1500 and our administrative assistant came outside and said "don't leave, the boss wants to see you". i knew i was in trouble, was going to be fired, and be living under a bridge somewhere!!! when i got in, it was a whirlwind. i was not in trouble, but i was going to chicago and my flight was leaving in just over 3 hours!!! and, rushing home to pack, pick ups kids, eat dinner, take them to their mother and get to the airport. my flight was scheduled to leave at 1940 bound for charlotte, nc. i arrived about 1845, got checked in and went to a lounge beside my departure gate. long story short, my 1940 flight left at 1920!!! never had a flight leave that early. got to charlotte and due to high winds, my flight was almost 2 hours late. after a very turbulent flight, i arrived at o'hare about 0130 and got to my hotel about 0300 and asleep about 0500. i was back up at 1100 and went to mci to get a rental bus. this was a brand new, 2008 mci. 20 minutes later i was going thru a construction zone on i90 and got side-swiped by a RODEWAY (intentional caps, yes i am screaming) bob-tail. he hit my mirror so hard, it flipped around and was touching my windshield. he kept on going. never stopped. surely his mother was a dog or he had no father. it took me over a mile to get over and it took almost 30 minutes to fix the mirror. hat's off to those help trucks that patrol our inner-city interstates who help motorists. i arrived at our shop about 2230 and had 2 trips the next day. one to the airport with an sec football team and then to flat creek, nc. in 2 days, i had covered a lot of ground. knoxville-chattanooga-raphine, va-knoxville-charlotte-chicago-knoxville-flat creek, nc.-knoxville. while all this sounds wild, in reality it is "all in a days work" and i would not trade it for anything!!!
until next time...

young life

2007-10-24T08:40:00.001-07:00

"objects in camera viewfinder are smaller than they appear"
sharp top-jasper, ga.

for the past 2 weekends, i have had the pleasure of taking 2 young life groups to "camp" for a weekend. when i was in high school, i was in young life. although now, i don't remember that much about it. recall is not what it used to be.
i love young life groups. i very much appreciate the time and energy the counselors put into the lives of our young people. as i posted earlier, our youth are not all bad. i honestly, truly believe if more of our youth were involved (with their hearts) in a young life group, our society would have far fewer problems. anything that takes kids out of their normal, peer-pressure filled lives and deposits good things in their hearts and minds is a good thing.
i don't normally promote websites. i don't normally promote "organizations". very rarely do i endorse all that much. i whole heartedly and without hesitation promote young life. their url is www.younglife.org and there is a lot of info there. copy/pasted from their website "what is young life" is the following:

"Picture a sea of teenage faces in a crowded school hallway. Some kids are trying to blend in; some are being carried along by the crowd; others are deliberately swimming against the tide. All of them are trying to find their way in a culture that is crowded with the noise and glare of media messages and peer expectations.

Young Life seeks to carry the message of Jesus Christ into that tumultuous tide and points teenagers toward life as they were created to live it. Since 1941, the dynamic that has characterized Young Life is its commitment to relationships — Young Life leaders meeting kids on their turf in the interest of friendship. As leaders get to know teenagers, they are able to share the love of Jesus Christ through platforms like Young Life club, Campaigners and trips to camp.

Whether kids are seeking answers or just acceptance, Young Life is there for them, armed with a desire for fun and the ultimate message of hope."

any time spent steering a young person in this direction is time well spent. plant some seeds today. you will see a bountiful harvest for generations to come.

until next time...

the competition

2007-10-06T08:51:00.000-07:00

today i have the pleasure to be a part of a 3 bus caravan taking a high school band, color guard and drum line to a regional competition. i have taken these guys before and they are very talented and led by some gifted people. every time i have taken them somewhere, they always win. no, it's not because of me!!! they are consistently that good. their leadership is well qualified to lead. and they do it well.
i was able to take my son with me on this trip. most of my trips he wants to go. because of school, he obviously can't. being a saturday and his interest in music, i felt this would be a good time to show him an option he will have when he enters middle school next year.
when this group travels, it is a fairly large entourage. 3 buses, an equipment truck (mid-size with hydraulic lift), another truck to transport the kawasaki mule, another truck for equipment, and a host of parents and helpers dedicated to making sure all goes smoothly and bring along misc. supplies and needed items. they are well equipped and well prepared. i can not imagine the expense these parents go to. they perform quite a bit so the costs are several thousands of dollars. i took them last year part of the way to orlando. the results they get are well worth the expense.
when i played in my school band, we were lucky to play at football games. we did not compete. now kids perform all over the country. the experience they are getting will go with them for the rest of their lives. i am priveledged to be able to be a small part of this experience and thankful to have the opportunity to watch them receive their rewards.
we hear the news about kids involved in gang activity, drugs and lots of other things. we have become so used to what once was abnormal that we miss the goodness most of our youth display. not every kid is in a gang. not all of them do drugs. because of media we come to believe that if one is, they all are. this is a good group who chose a different path and even if you choose not to see the good, it still exists. you are missing something. these kids always are polite and respectful to me. they greet me with a sincere "hi" and as they get off they actually say "thank you". most of them will tell me they are glad i took them and they hope i take them again. goodness is out there and you may not have to look as hard as you think. take those jaded glasses off and look again. it's not as bad as you think.
until next time...

pics from louisiana to home

2007-10-05T13:25:00.001-07:00

sugar cane field in la.
cotton harvest time
dust devil in "loozyanna"

high honor

2007-10-05T10:48:00.000-07:00

tuesday i got a call from our general manager. another company needed 2 more drivers for a large troop movement from ft. cambell, ky. to ft. polk, la. for those of you familiar with this blog, you know my gratitude to every soldier for the job they do to keep us safe. being able to transport them would, and is, a high honor for me.
our trip started out with thirty buses picking them up and relaying them to a truckstop in west tennessee. from there me, as well as 30 fresh drivers were to take them the rest of the way, about 550 miles. i got a call from my partner that they would be meeting me in about one hour. so, i waited. after about 2 1/2 hours, i called him back. he told me they had been involved in a wreck and were waiting om law enforcement to finish their investigation. a big truck rear ended one of the buses on the interstate and pushed him into the bus in front . the bus in the middle has some serious damage and was out of service. a new bus was coming and they would soon be on their way. finally, they were released to continue their trip. all this being said, by the time they got to us, we had been waiting almost 4 hours. when they arrived, they had to eat. by the time we loaded, we were pulling out at 4pm. we were supposed to leave at 11am. 2 exits later, the transmission on one of the buses went out. those soldiers were divided and put on the other buses. by the time we got to ft. polk, la. at 345am, we were tired. especially the soldiers. when i was watching them unload their equipment, it occurred to me they not only had all of their equipment but their guns as well. i started talking to one of the leaders on my bus. nice guy. he was picking up the body armour vests and tossing them like it was nothing. as they hit the ground, it sounded like bricks falling. i picked it up and i was amazed at how heavy it was. i asked him and he said it was about 40-45lbs. and, it did not have the side plates in so add another 5-10 pounds. i asked him about their rucksacks and he said they were about 45lbs and their equipment/supply belts were another 10-15lbs. then, their helmets are made of kevlar. add another 5lbs. so, when these guys are training, they are carrying 100-120lbs. my 2 youngest children together don't weigh that much!!! i can not imagine going on a 5-10 mile hike with this stuff but they do. and then, i asked about their weapons. now, i have been raised with guns and have owned at least one since i was about knee high. he explained the features of his rifle and then he handed it to me. add another 5lbs.!!! it was heavy and just by the feel you could tell they had some of the best and most technologically advanced equipment in the world. it was incredible to hold this. as i got lost in the moment, i looked him in the eye to thank him for taking the time to show me this stuff. i was blind sided by the reality that of the 44 guys on my bus, some may not make it back from their next deployment. these were guys that could be our neighbors, our sons, daughters, or kids that grew up with my kids. the sting of reality brings a soberness that leads to the fact that these guys do what they do for me. and you. and this great country. they did it by choice. they chose to do all of this so i can breathe free air. they could be married, going to college or a host of other things. they chose to do this for me and you. next time you see a soldier, thank him for a job well done. you may not agree but he is fighting for you to maintain your right of voice. they fight so someone will not take that away. Sgt., thanks.
until next time...

waiting on a phone call

2007-09-25T10:54:00.000-07:00

i am bored. it is hard to believe that i have not driven in almost 2 weeks. i love my children and i am so happy to spend some time with them. their mom is in florida so i am mr. dad and mr. mom. no complaints about that. i wish i had them all here so we could have 4 way arguments instead of 2 ways!!!
as i sit here, i am bored. i have lots to do. it is easy to put doing things off. after all, the phone might ring anytime, right? but i can't leave. i can justify putting off the things i should be doing to make room for the things i may not end up doing. makes perfect sense doesn't it?
my time off is good and deep inside i know it. i need the break from the road because i know my perspective will change when i get my next assignment and get behind the wheel.
funny how things change in life. for most of our lives we dread going to work. we enjoy all the fruits of our labors. i like to eat. i like to play. work has only provided the means to do what i wanted to do. this is different. i love what i do. i love trips and every one is different. the people are different. it is not boring at all. i feast on being around other people and i guess that is why i love doing what i do.
i have been considering some life and career changes and i am stuck moving forward. i have seen a lot of geese lately so i know that no matter the direction i will be okay. sometimes god does not move fast enough for me and i get impatient. when i do i make bad decisions and suffer the consequences. i have enough maturity now to know that even waiting is progress in motion. i can't see it but i trust. god may not move fast enough for me but i know his timing is perfect and mine is always late or early. so, i wait.

until next time...

is this what we are leaving to our children?

2007-09-19T16:38:00.000-07:00

i wanted to think "not in my state" when i heard about this on fox news tonight. today a judge said the lethal injection violated the inmates eight amendment protections. i copied and pasted this so don't think i am changing my protocol. i would not go to the trouble. i read this on a tv station website and included are the comments i posted there. am i alone in this?

"U.S. District Judge Aleta Trauger said the protocol "presents a substantial risk of unnecessary pain." She said it violates death row inmate Edward Jerome Harbison's Eighth Amendment protections against cruel and unusual punishment."

this is the dumbest thing i have ever heard. to think we should be sensitive to him suffering before he dies? i don't care if he cries like a school girl. i hope his pain is excruciating, long and graphic. and then the judge added;

"the new protocol does not ensure that inmates are properly anesthetized before the lethal injection is administered". i wondered if the judge saw crime scene photos of his victim. did the killer check to see if she was "properly anesthetized" before he beat her to death?

"Harbison was scheduled to be executed early next Wednesday for beating an elderly woman to death during a burglary in 1983."

beating death? do people really know how hard it is to beat someone to death? the pain and suffering they feel?

if we allow idiots like this continue to stay on the bench then we can no longer question decisions like this that are made. when will we rise up as a civilized society and say no more? the more i read stuff like this, the more i believe in bernard goetz and vigilante justice. i say we turn this murderer loose. when vigilante's get finished with him the lethal injection might not look so "cruel and unusual".

god help us all.

there may not be a next time...

season stats

2007-09-18T09:08:00.000-07:00

as i mentioned earlier, i would post some statistics from my road trips this year. these are baseball road trips only.

15 ROAD TRIPS

14,876 MILES

92 DAYS ON THE ROAD

16 PLAYERS PROMOTED TO EITHER “AAA” OR MAJORS

SEASON START (ON THE ROAD) 04/04/2007

LAST ROAD GAME (PLAYOFFS) 09/10/2007

my time with these players was one of the most memorable of my life. i am very grateful for the experiences. i hope when the season starts in '08, i will again have the opportunity.

this blog is not just about baseball as you can see. a lot of my trips i do not post about. i will try to do better in the future to chronicle my travels and add photos as i can or deem appropriate. chances are, if you are reading this you know who i am or at least who i drive for. i will not volunteer this information as i know this is available to anyone worldwide. i do not use names or specifics for obvious reasons and never will.
until next time...

master yoda was there for the playoffs

2007-09-17T11:01:00.000-07:00

my life is not a boring life. life on the road is not boring. combine my life and life on the road and it really is quite interesting.
over the last 5 months with a minor league baseball team, i have seen and experienced a lifetime of oddities-some sad and some absolutely hilarious. this is one of the latter.
i was backing my coach into my designated parking spot just outside the gates of joe evans field (a/k/a/ "the joe"). i noticed a honda accord parked on the street with a passenger in the front seat. all i could see was a stick due to sun glare. the coach i had brought the guys down in was our flagship. 2 9' couches, in-motion satellite tv, radio and wi-fi. coffeemaker with 2 beverage dispensers as well as refrigerator, ice chest and microwave. seats trimmed in leather and also an inverter for ac power. it is a cream puff. anyway, i am sitting on the coach watching fox news and the passenger has not moved. kinda odd i thought. i dozed off (actually rem) and when i woke up he was still there. this had been well over an hour and i was quite concerned at this motionless figure in a car on a fairly warm day. becoming curious, i walked up to the car and here is what i saw!!!

until next time...

the playoffs

2007-09-15T10:36:00.000-07:00

we made the playoffs!!! it has been a wild ride but we made the league playoffs. as i write this, hang with me.
it started in raleigh when we won and got the "wild card" in the playoffs. it was a big deal. we started the season with a great team. we lost almost all of our original team as well as some that were sent up from "a" ball. just estimating, i can recall at least 10 players who were promoted to "aaa" and 6 who went to the majors. not too bad. i don't know of any other team who sent that many players on. i remember in one day, 6 trades were made. i remember taking my son to a home game and him asking me who were those guys wearing our team uniforms. so many new faces. and, we kept winning!!!
we went to huntsville for 2 games.we won the first game and lost the second. we came home for the third game and won and lead the best of five series 2-1. we went back to huntsville and lost games 4 and five. i thought the trip back home would be hard but these guys being professionals, knew it was "just baseball" and that was the way it went. it was hard loading the bus for the last time. earlier in the day, i sttod in the dugout with any eerie feeling that this was going to be over. i was not ready. i spent a lot of time with these guys and they had become like family to me. i stood looking at the field for a good 30 minutes taking in all i could. the smells, the gentle breeze as i felt it on my face, the sounds of people filing into the stadium and the Star Spangled Banner being sung for the last time. this was harder than i imagined but i knew tonight was do or die.
after the game and as the players came out with their equipment bags, i shook everyones hand and to my surprise, the all hugged me and thanked me!!! they thanked me!!! i was the one who started out thanking them for some lifelong memories and ended up with them thanking me. i was moved beyond words. i started off as "just the bus driver" and according to the coach, i became "team". thinking ahead to next year, i look forward to seeing how these guys will mature and get better. seeing their careers change and their personal lives continue to develop. get married and have children. and i know some will not change beyond time distance.
i am compiling some stats that i have kept thru out the year. when i am finished i will be posting them here as well as my year end recap.
as for me, i am looking forward to seeing my family more often. as much as i loved these players
my own children will always come first. i look forward to seeing my 4 children and creating some lifelong memories of our time together. i missed them everyday and i want them all here with me now. school has started and in time i will.
until next time...

pics from flagstaff to amarillo trip

2007-08-27T08:25:00.000-07:00

sunrise over elk city, ok.
double rainbows somewhere around arizona/new mexico line.
straight and flat i-40 with a storm ahead.
flat land all around and then this. kinda like combining the hills of east tennessee and the plains of the mid-west.
flagstaff, az.

pics from mobile trip

2007-08-27T08:08:00.001-07:00

one more view from my room at "hotel crappy" in mobile, al. uss alabama can be seen behind the silos.
this is what one of my therapy sessions looks like!!! orange beach, al. had a day off and took a few of the "guys" to the beach. baby jellyfish by the thousands were washing upon the beach. wasn't sure if they could sting as they were about fingernail size. was not going to take a chance. had one get inside my bathing suit 2 years ago and just had a big time on the inside of my right thigh!!!
photo from my hotel room in mobile. this is a wide angle shot of the "holiday" cruise ship that greeted me wednesday morning. by late this afternoon, it had reloaded and was back out going to cozumel.
one of the views looking out of my hotel room. mobile, al.

the slave trade was just wrong

2007-08-24T18:49:00.000-07:00

i am in mobile alabama. for several days when i go to “warm-up” the coach, the temperature has been 120-127 inside. it takes a long time for a vehicle that size to cool down.

it has been a wild 6 days here. the riverfront plaza has been the most inhospitable hotel i have ever stayed in. to spend over $200 per night here i would have expected more accommodating service. buses are obviously not wanted here. only mercedes suv’s and other luxury vehicles get the “star” treatment here. however the views of mobile bay and the river are spectacular. seeing the big freighters up close is really cool.

recently I read where london has acknowledged their part in the slave trade. while a good step in the right direction it was wrong to begin with. i have been thinking about how hot it is here. it has been consistently over 100 everyday. as i watched a ship pulling out, i saw it’s registry was singapore. i don’t know how long it takes to get there from here. i could google it and find out. if i had wireless internet but i don’t. crappy hotel.

anyway with the news from london, i began to wonder how long it would take a slave ship from london to get here in the 1700’s or 1800’s. keep in mind they were not air-conditioned. some accounts i read said it often took months to make the crossing. these people were chained and stacked like cord wood. to some it was just another commodity. these were real, live human beings who felt pain and emotions just like you and i. their lives were to make the lives of the owners better and more profitable. if they “bred” and had children then it was good. if they died, too bad. Next ship was coming soon with fresh “commodities”.

so, here we are in 2007. we pushed it under the rug and have tried to make the problem go away but it won’t. i hope that one day when we enter the pearly gates we not only come face to face with our creator, but that those who participated in the slave trade will have the chance to see all the lives and families ruined by their actions and greed. i believe in the power of forgiveness. i hope to witness some of this reparation.

this black eye on civilization will never heal. however, we must move on in order to be stronger. words escape me as i try to close this and sort thru my own views. forgive me if my closing is brief but what more can i say?

until next time…

i did not want to know his name

2007-08-11T21:04:00.000-07:00

today started off by dropping off my youngest 2 with their grandfather. their mom is in atlanta and i am going to flagstaff. as i was leaving my home airport, there was a young (3-4?) girl in front of me going thru security. she was pushing her baby doll stroller and looking very grownup and assured. she was wearing a teal blue sequined dress and was traveling with her mom and dad. her hair looked like a newborns hair-very thin and very short. as i watched her it was obvious she had been thru chemotherapy and was just starting to grow back. i flashed back to my brother going thru his chemo and heartbroken he was when he would see the kids at m.d. anderson in houston going in for their treatments. he was stage 4 (terminal) and instead of focusing on his own mortality, he was feeling the pain of someone he did not even know. now i know some of how he was feeling. after boarding in charlotte, there were about 25 servicemen on this flight. having flown alot, seeing them is not uncommon.
after a weird series of events, 2 ended up sitting beside me. one of them i had seen earlier. nice looking guy, mid 20's and had that military confident aire about him. he and the other soldier started talking and soon he spoke to me.
he was very talkative and we talked about alot of things. he had just completed basic training, was 25 and had been a bartender. he was from baltimore. he turned to the other guy and started asking him about his outfit. i had turned on my computer and my wallpaper is a copy of the "lee teter" print he did for the vietnam veterans. it is haunting. in a split second
it occured to me that i was supposed to pray for him and the others and i had images of Arlington come to me. i tried to push past all this and then he did it-he introduced himself to the other soldier. his name was robert reynolds. i did not want to know this. i have a habit of meeting people and forming a bond with them. now i knew i had to pray. i felt that if i did not, i would find his name on a stone at Arlington and i knew i would lose it right there.
so, i prayed for him. i prayed for the others. i prayed for our military leadership. i prayed for the president. there was a guy sitting in 1st class who bought sandwiches for all the guys in uniform. i wished i could have. there are times i get angry that i can't do more for other people. i would love to be so filthy rich that i could donate almost all of it to make peoples lives better. i wished i could go with them. they know that one day soon they will be in iraq and their world will be forever changed.
today has been one of those days that takes me out of my own little world. i like my own little world. it centers around God/Church, my children, and driving my coach. my own little world is comfortable and i really like it there. god takes me out of there and shows me things i otherwise would have missed. he wants me to see more than my world. these guys on my flight today stepped "out of their worlds" by choice to do an honorable thing for you, me, this country and all of mankind. when i step back and take it in, praying is not only the least thing i can do for these guys, it is the most powerful thing i can do. you can be a powerful force for these courageous men and women. this war on terrorism will probably never be "won". but i truly believe fervent prayer can change any course set out by man no matter hell bent he is to destroy. so pray. and pray hard. pray without ceasing. as the t-shirt says "pray hard". our country, our world and these guys depend on it.
until next time...

oops, God did it again

2007-08-05T20:03:00.000-07:00

lately, some pieces of the life puzzle have surfaced. i have been observant enough to notice that when is God is working in me, i see him in some rather abstract ways. i have mentioned this in an earlier post titled "God is a goose". well, for some time i have not seen God at work and these abstracts have not been there. i know He is always there no matter where or what. sometimes obvious, sometimes in stealth mode. yesterday the engine in my van started giving me problems and i know it's life is almost over. as i was driving past a large cemetery on the way to church, a flock of geese were right on the side of the road. after seeing this, i knew God was reminding me that he is still there and whatever else i face, it will be OK. tonight, on the way to church, my kids got into a food fight in the car. i grabbed the plate of mac and cheese from my 9 year old and dumped it in my lap. as i sat there about to explode, i was driving past the same cemetery and the geese were back. it was a hard family moment and God's timing is always perfect. i did not explode but rather felt peace. i needed God right then, that split second and he knew it. i needed him and as always, he was there. if i analyze this too much, i would wonder the significance of the geese being by a cemetery and start to think somebody close to me may die soon. i don't know if this will happen. maybe it is me. i just don't know. i do know this-whatever does happen He will be there with me. i trust and believe and yes, it is that simple.
until next time...

sean hannity freedom concert

2007-07-13T12:12:00.000-07:00

i am a member of the "religious" right. i am also part of the moral majority, the christian right, born again, right wing zealot and a host of other things. i believe in god who is the creator of all. i also believe that you have the freedom to worship as you choose. after all, we are given the right of "freedom of religion". i support our military and our president. i think you get the idea.
a few days ago i was chosen to take a local radio station "staff" to atlanta for the evening. when i arrived to pick them up and it turns out i was taking them to a sean hannity freedom concert. needless to say, i was in right wing heaven!!! traffic across atlanta took us nearly 3 hours so when we arrived, we had already missed about 30 minutes of it. i missed lee greenwood and heard i missed fred thompson, my choice to run for president. i did get to see charlie daniels (he has definitely gotten better with age), newt gingrich, larry the cable guy, ron white, col. oliver north (awesome) montgomery gentry and if i left anybody out i apologize. it was 3 hours of incredible experiences.
i have written in previous posts about how i appreciate all our militaries have done and continue to do for us every second of every day. i guess that is why i jump at the chance to go to washington (Arlington Cemetery, Vietnam Memorial, Iwo Jima, etc.). this concert series is an incredible experience and anyone who is a red, white and blue fan needs to go. it is uplifting and emotional. the work that sean hannity, oliver north and countless others are doing deserves recognition. i proudly offer this link and urge you to go to it now. www.hannity.com. copy and paste in your browser address bar and happy surfing. also try www.freedomalliance.org. the only comment further to make is "GOD BLESS AMERICA" and all those who sacrifice to keep us free!!!
until next time...

July 4th, the security dude, and the family who got it right

2007-07-06T13:09:00.000-07:00

i had spoken to him on several occasions at the game. "jeff" was a security dude. he was tall, had short blond hair and was leanly built. we joked about several things. as the game went on, i noticed him interacting with various people in the crowd. most of them were wearing their red, white and blue. he and i started talking on the concourse and some of his parents friends came up. we all were talking when the woman asked how one of their friends was doing better. turns out they were referring to one of his buddies who did a year in iraq with him. he had been affected emotionally and was having a hard time dealing with all he had witnessed. we will never know all these brave men and women in our militaries do for their country. he told about raids and some of the people he interacted with. one day they would be outside the base selling cd's and the next day they would have body bombs strapped on trying to kill you and everybody they could. he got back in december '06 and said he would gladly go back if called. my first reaction was "why" but deep inside i knew why. after a while, i offered my hand, shook his and thanked him for all he did for us. in a soft, low key way he said "you're welcome".
at this game there were several bus loads of soldiers. after the game, they all lined up outside the gates to get on their buses. sergeants would bark orders and they would trot single file to their bus and get on. after they loaded all the buses, they started to drive off. as they drove off, i noticed on family of 5-6 who were standing there clapping as they went by. they were the only ones out of over 10,000 people to honor these men and women this way. it is something we should do every time we see on of them. i was moved to witness this 30 second event. i thanked God i live in America. despite all of our differences and challenges that face us, this is still the best place on earth to live and breathe free air. thank God!!!
until next time...

huntsville hard

2007-07-04T22:36:00.000-07:00

this morning we left for huntsville for a 4 game series. i had not thought that much about the connection. my brother lived in huntsville for several years before finally moving to houston to work at the johnson space center. i was sitting in the stands and a wave of emotion came over me. i almost lost it. as i watched the traffic on memorial parkway (fitting isn't it), i wondered how many times he had driven it. had he ever been to a baseball game here? how far from here did he he live? if you are reading this i am referring my only brother who died of cancer 7 years ago. i have written about this in earlier posts.
as i sat there it occured to me that i never really grieved his death. at the time, my ex-wife and i were starting to divorce and that in itself was tough. then his death was something i "dealt with". my parents were so hurt at that time and i knew i had to be strong for them. my sister-in-law was a psychotic bitch (sorry 'bout that one) and the whole after death was horrible. i believe his death was one of the factors in my fathers passing 2 years later. still, i see i need to grieve. i am here for 3 more days so i will be able to process some emotions and carry them home with me. i am hurting and i do not know what to do in order to grieve. all i know is, i am hurting and was blindsided by all of this.
i know that some people resort to sex. some it is drugs and alcohol. for others it is over eating. i don't know how i will move thru this, i just know i will.
until next time...

lightning in raleigh

2007-07-04T22:15:00.000-07:00

i have a deep respect for the fury of "mother nature". i have been known to stand and watch lightning storms and not just admire but appreciate one of natures wonders. never have i been close enough to be harmed by a tornado. i have been on the gulf coast and been in a tropical depression and a storm. i love being around things such as violent storms. i have driven by bus in ohio with wind strong enough to rip whole corn stalks out of the ground and have them pummel the side of the coach and blow other vehicles off the road. my 8 year old (9 in a week) is terrified of a rain storm.
wednesday night a lightning storm came while i was sitting in the dugout. it came up fast and there was almost no rain. after about 10 minutes i could tell the storm was right on top of us. i also realized i am sitting in a concrete like bunker with tons of steel over me. about that time i heard the loudest crack i have ever heard and felt the hair on my arms stand. i yelled at one of the groundskeepers if we had taken a direct hit. he replied "yep" and never really batted an eye. it got my attention. turns out it struck a lightpole about 100 feet away. thinking it was soon to pass, i sat there "appreciating" nature. then i heard another loud crack that seemed to last about 15 seconds. i yelled "another one?" and he said "yep". i asked where and he indicated another lightpole. this one was about 50 feet away. i decided it was time to go to the clubhouse not thinking about it's metal roof.
it took me back to several years ago, sometime in the mid 1980's. i had a neighbor who was playing golf with his uncle and 2 other family members. the got caught in a thunderstorm and not only was he struck and killed by lightning, his uncle and another were too. the 4th one suffers permanent damage. i remember the day after his funeral his wife got notification he had passed his cpa exam. so much of his life was ahead of him. but isn't that true with most tradegies?
as i thought about mike it occured to me that as i am know older and others depend on me that maybe it is time to stop being such a risk taker and settle down and be more cautious. i still have small children who depend on me. the people i drive for depend on me. and i depend on me too because i still am trying to find god's purpose for me on a daily basis. i also remember helen keller's words "life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all". well, i guess the decision is obvious. i still want to god's will but who says i can't enjoy the ride. who knows, the next ride may be the best yet!!!
until next time...

a funny thing happened on the way to the gym

2007-06-28T09:42:00.000-07:00

"why does bottled water have an expiration date" was the question posed to me by one of the players as he was getting on the bus to go to the gym. i said "it must be marketing". the strength coach said he thought it was the plastic. i told them i knew ice had an expiration date on it and the way i remembered was after hurricane katrina fema trucked in truckloads of ice that went bad and had to be thrown out. then i remembered the civil defense used to store barrels of water and crackers and i don't remember an expiration date on them. when i mentioned the civil defense, several players asked what that was. i tried to explain but i could not find the words nor do i know if the civil defense still exists. i need to google that one. i asked the original player who brought up the subject how old he was. when he answered "24" then i knew why he and the others had never heard of the civil defense and what they were about. then, reality hit as i realized i am old enough to be these guys father!!!
i am in the process of altering my lifestyle. i broke my ankle in may of last year and except for 1 stint on the treadmill, i had not worked out since. i have a total gym xl at home and it is an incredible piece of equipment. prior to my ankle accident, i was on it at least 4 times per week. it felt good to workout and i missed it. for a while. after several weeks turning into months, it becomes a very expensive dust collector. it is in the same spot where i left it.
so, i am back in the gym with a group of professional athletes and watching them and what they do, i know i will never be able to do what they can do. youth is on their side. age and gravity are on mine and i am losing. point is, sometimes in life we see ourselves as we were and not as we are. i joke with several of the players about switching clothes so i can play in their place. i know i can't do what they do. what i can do is get them from point "a" to point "b" as safely as possible. it is still a thrill to do what i do. it is also a thrill to be with these players and live thru them. i have my own function here and i will do it to the best of my ability just as they do theirs to the best of their ability.
by the way, why does bottled water have an expiration date?
until next time...

body piercing saved my life

2007-06-27T21:49:00.000-07:00

he was standing in front of me waiting to get ice cream when i noticed in bold letters what was on the back of his shirt. it plainly said "body piercing saved my life". he turned to say something to one of his children and i noted that he appeared to be in his 50's, maybe 60's. he did not look like the typical "piercer" and so i looked closer at his shirt and then i noticed the nails and the faint image of Christ and then i fully understood what it meant. while a little whimsical, it is a bold statement to his faith. sometimes i am amazed at what Christians believe. it is more amazing what they do not believe and that is all that Christ did for me and you. while waiting for the players to get on the bus, one of the players interrupted his phone call to show me the new book he was reading. it is entitled "i don't have enough faith to be an atheist". he told me it was a "deep thinkers" book which may exclude me from reading it. keep in mind this player is the same one referenced in one of my jacksonville posts. he was the one who asked me about going to church Easter morning. once again, the spirit is moving and i am puzzled with these 2 events. wherever this leads, i can say with confidence that the spirit is moving. i strongly believe there are no coincidences in life. all of our days are well planned by our creator. so, what happens next i will keep you posted. yesterday, i went to the vitamin store and as i entered, one of the employees said, "today is the day that the lord has made" and as i started to finish, three of us in unison said "and i will rejoice and be glad in it". turned out they were ordained and had been on mission trips lately. after we talked, i realized how much i had been blessed by their words. living on the road as i do, i get hungry and thirsty for the word. and always, without fail, god shows me he is still there with me. his timing is precise and he is never late. it is with a grateful heart i too can boldly say "body piercing saved my life".
until next time...

back in d.c.

2007-06-23T14:02:00.000-07:00

got a call yesterday (thursday) from our dispatcher. one of our coaches (the same one i take the team on road trips in) had blown the turbo and they wanted to know if i would take our newest coach up to washington and when the repairs are made on the other one, bring it home. i had my son with me at the time so i had to call his mother and make sure it was ok. we packed and headed out the door and within a few hours we were on our way.

this was my 4^th trip to washington this year. in earlier posts, i have mentioned my love for the washington area. it was and still is, my dream to take all of my children (4) up there for a week and show them the area. i was excited as was my son. i had told him many times before how badly i wanted to take them and he was as excited as i have seen any kid. only problem was as soon as the repairs were made we were to head back home. after several phone calls, the owner told me i had to take my son to d.c. for a day so he could see it. When your boss tells you something like this, you do it. i am very thankful to be working for a very family oriented boss.

with blessings from the boss, all i needed was the coach as by now the other driver had picked up the one i came up in. mid afternoon friday, the shop called and said the coach had been repaired and ready to be picked up. i called a cab, picked up the coach and we were headed to d.c.!!!

let me back up. we stayed in manassas, va. which is about 30 minutes from d.c. the whole trip from manassas to d.c. was “wide eyed wonder” and i was so happy to be able to do this. we started off with the white house, went to the capital, jefferson memorial, washington monument, and drove by countless others. we were trying to figure out what to do about dinner so we ended up at union station. we stayed in dc about 4 hours decided we would have to come back tomorrow and do it again.

the next day, there was some special event on the mall so we went to the lincoln, drove around some more and finally ended up at Arlington National Cemetery. we walked around for a while and went to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. we got there about 10 minutes before the changing of the guard and we decided to stay for that. watching to changing is very impressive and i could tell my son was too. as we were leaving, he attempted his best “heel clicks” like they do and i felt a warmth rush thru me. it was a moment in time that you know will be remembered for a lifetime. i knew this trip left had impressions on a young mind.

after this, we both knew it was time to go home. i was sad and began to feel my eyes “sweat”. Arlington always does that to me. i am so grateful for what these men and women did for me and this great country. as we walked, for the most part it was silence. in the words of a series of commercials, this moment was “priceless”.

until next time…

ollie ollie raleigh

2007-06-23T13:45:00.000-07:00

yeah, i know. kinda goofy for a blog entry. sometimes while driving, i (or my mind) play word games. being ADD, it just sorta happens. for some reason, i got to thinking about childhood games and for some reason, “red rover” popped in my mind. i had a real red rover (you know, the SUV) pass me and i thought the whole thing was kinda cool. makes me want one with a vanity plate. anyway, remember the game? “red rover, red rover send (insert a friend’s name here)”. and then we would join arms and whoever we called would come running and try to break our arm-in-arm grip. but there was some other game and i can’t remember much about it except for “ollie ollie oxen”. anybody out there, please let me know.

this series was our worst road trip this year. we went 1-4 against a team in last place in their division. as a matter of fact, they had a 9 game losing streak until we arrived. we won’t discuss this series much further except to say our next road trip is a 6 game series against the same team so stay tuned. we leave in 10 days!!!

overall, this trip was odd. losing 4 games, i put some scratches on the coach just after it got repaired/painted from where another driver scraped a retaining wall at dollywood. we had a 27 mile shuttle to the ballpark one way which means with 3 trips daily, i was doing a lot of driving. most road trips, it is 1-3 miles from hotel to park. gives me something to look forward to!!

at this writing, we are still 4 games above .500 so overall we are not doing too badly. i still believe in these guys and i am confident most will go on in their careers and achieve great things. they are talented and well coached. they have always treated me with respect and courtesy and never been rowdy on the trips. i can’t say enough good things about these players.

until next time…

jackson tennessee

2007-06-11T14:43:00.000-07:00

jackson is my home town. i was born here in 1956 to 2 wonderful parents. as i have said earlier, i had “ward and june cleaver” for parents. i moved from here in 1979 and have called another part of the state home since then. this time was different. i was driving a 57 passenger motor coach back to my hometown along with my 9 year old son and the baseball team.

my mom still lives here and will be 82 this year. she lives alone in the house i grew up in. she is independent and i know she gets lonely. most all of the friends she and daddy had are gone. my schedule sometimes does not give me sufficient time to get back to see her as often as i need to.

coming back with my son and the team was kinda odd. occasionally when i come home i run into someone i grew up with. i was hoping to see some old friends at the park but that never happened. i love baseball. i love my family. combining the 2 is nirvana. i wish i had all my children with me. having 3 daughters around those players would not have been good. this is a great bunch of guys. putting them around my daughters is something else altogether.

anyway, it was a great series. we went 3-2.

i did get the opportunity to go to the cemetery to visit my father, brother, nephew and grandmother. my nephew died long ago as did my grandmother. my nephew was only 6 weeks old when he died. my grandmother was 83. my brother was 54 and my dad was 81. i miss my brother and my dad. my brother was every young kid’s dream of a big brother. at the time of his death from renal cell carcinoma, he was one of the managers in charge of research and design for the international space station. kinda cool for a job. his friends were astronauts. as a matter of fact at his funeral, jim buchley spoke. i forget how many shuttle missions he went on. i do know at one time he held the record for the most number of space walks and time spent spacewalking. needless to say, i have some really cool souvenirs.

of all the people in my life, i miss my dad the most. i guess that now, i am really starting to grieve his passing. i still feel some sting as i wish for just one more phone call, or one more of his “hey son” when i would see him. i can still see his face light up when i would see him. i also remember seeing him break down and cry when i would leave. just like i am doing as i recall all of this.

until next time…

Down in Mississippi And Up To No Good

2007-06-11T11:04:00.000-07:00

that is a song by jennifer nettles and sugarland. it is a neat song and fits well with what i am about to write. the date on this blog is not correct. this event took place may 19th or so.
we had an early game against mississippi and some of the guys looked like they needed a diversion. i suggested going to a casino in vicksburg which was about 45 minutes away. about 15 said "if you're going to a casino, i'm there" so i had quite a few that wanted to go. i got permission to take them away for the night. only 1 showed up to actually go.
so off we went for the 2 hour drive that was only supposed to take 45 minutes. a big truck jack-knifed and the interstate was shut down. being on a bus, we had about all we needed to sit and wait. bathroom, drinks (non-alcoholic of course) and room to stand up in an air conditioned environment. i felt sorry for those other people who had to shut their cars down and sit in the heat. i truly did.
after we arrived, he was going to show me all about "craps". after about an hour, he lost about $200. i like his philosophy about gambling. to him it was entertainment. he compared it to going out on the town for a night. dinner at a nice restaurant, a movie or play, and then dessert somewhere. figure out how much you are willing to play for that nights entertainment and that is what you go in with, if you spend it all, it's time to go home.
i had about $40 with me so i started playing blackjack. at a $5 table. after about an hour and a half, i was up $300. he was still at the Craps table and i was having fun. he came over and we stayed another 2 hours and i was still up $200. he went back to the craps table and came back about 15 minutes later broke. i gave him a $5 chip and he started playing blackjack and went up about $200. he went back to the craps table and lost again. it was time to go and i was still up $150. he decided on one more roll at the table so i went back to the blackjack table and won another $100. it was definitely time to go.
i can see where people get addicted to gambling. it would be so easy. keep in mind my friends philosophy. it is entertainment and that is what makes it fun. learn when to walk away.
until next time...

Why Me?

2007-05-17T22:25:00.000-07:00

God sometimes really puzzles me. for quite some time now i have been directing my church's video production. i love it. i love serving and this is a perfect fit for me. i try very hard to make it with some zip and give it some unique touches.
last sunday, or music and media minster said to me " i really need someone to take this ministry and run with it" and that was all he had to say. since then God has been working on me and i know this is a great opportunity for me. God does that to people. a seed gets planted and you never know who will step up. i did. i called and emailed him to tell him i would like to be the one. wish me luck.
until next time...

Pearl Mississippi

2007-05-17T22:10:00.000-07:00

it's been about a week since the last post so this may be long. then again, it may not. we ended up 2-3 in alabama and now we are on a 5 game series and we dropped tonight's game. gosh, these guys looked good.
when we were loading the bus, a hard rain came so i had some time to just sit and see some of the players with their families. most of the time, we are on the way somewhere or we are already there before or after a game. so, it's them and me. most of these guys are in their early 20's and are still "kids" except for the staff who are all well seasoned, mature men. some have played in the majors. to watch these guys with their wives and kids was very touching. i say goodbye to my children and hug them goodbye. i squeeze them hard when i get back home. same with them i found their soft spots and theirs are the same as mine-their families. it is kinda neat to see their kids (and for some their dogs but that is another blog) mix with the other players. i saw one kid run up to another player and jump into his arms. i don't know who got the most out of that exchange. i believe i did though.
on a sad note, 2 players did not get to come with us. they got "sent down" to "a" ball and i was sad that they were not coming. one in particular. saying goodbye to one of them for some reason bothered me. i shook hands with one of them as he got out of the shower. i have never shook hands with a naked man before. we needed to get on down the road. as i shook his hand, i said " i have never shaken a naked mans hand. he laughed and i told him i was going to miss him. he used to rub my head for "good luck" as he would get off the bus for a game. reminds me of one of my previous blogs about luck. hey. if it works. then again, it didn't appear to help him much.
until next time...

Catch Up Time

2007-05-09T20:58:00.000-07:00

it is wednesday night in montgomery and we won after 2 losses. i have never been around these guys when the have lost 2 in a row. it was hard. as far as a road trip goes, it is a success so far. their record is 5-3 and we have 2 games to go. even if we lose the next 2 games and go home 5-5 it is still a good road trip. i don't think we will lose the next 2.
montgomery is a beautiful area. the homes in the downtown area are beautiful. the "first white house of the confederacy" is magnificent as well as the state capital building. i am going to find out how to add photos to this blog so you can see some of what i write about. the moss growing in the trees still amazes me but late at night is kinda spooky. for those of you who are history buffs this place is one to see. interesting contrast and similarities with washington. down here they still wave the confederate, or rebel flag. no comments either way from me although it is still a part of our history and heritage. admire it for what it is. i don't see the hate associated it as some seem to claim. but, then again, i am not african-american either.
this sunday is mother's day. i am thankful mine is still living. she is 82 years old. she is independant, lives alone, still drives and does not take medicine like other "seniors" do. i wish i could be with her but my schedule will not permit it. i am planning a trip to see her the last week of this month and will stay for a week. we have a 5 game series in the town she lives in and my 9 year old is going to go with me. it will be a great trip and i am looking forward to it. anytime i can see my mom, baseball, and have some of my kids with me is high on my list of having a good time.
until next time...

I Miss My Dad

2007-05-05T12:24:00.000-07:00

i miss my dad. he was a really neat guy. never met a stranger. he always had a nod or a word for most everybody he came in contact with. i guess that is where i get my core personality from.
dad died 4 years ago. he was 81 and up until 2 weeks before he dies, he was in good health to be his age. only 5 bypasses 10 years earlier and he lost a leg to an infection in his toe. minor diabetic too. he was not on insulin. he complained of his back and neck hurting and for him to complain, you knew he was in pain. mother took him to the doctor twice and even took him to the hospital which is a 5 minute drive. mid afternoon, march 17th, mother heard a loud noise and my father was motionless on the floor. he had tripped on his walker as he had not put his prosthesis on. she tried to roll him over and he was unconscious. she called 911 and they stayed on the phone until the paramedics got there. being so close to the hospital they were there within a few minutes. after the paramedics got there, they called for the advanced life support team. it took quite some time for them to stabilize him. one of the paramedics told my mother he was paralyzed before they put him on the gurney.
the loaded him in the ambulance and while they were working on him, my mother called me. i remember i was at work and when she called me, my knees buckled and i went to the floor. within 30 minutes of her call, i had gone home, packed my car and was on the road for the 5 hour drive. her call shook me so bad. i could tell she was so scared and hurting.
i got there about 9pm that night and he died 5 minutes into our 6pm icu visit the next day. i got to see him for about 5 minutes when i first arrived. i was walking down a hallway, lost, and just so happened they wheeled him by on the way to icu. i told him i loved him. that was the last time he was able to hear me.
tests showed when he fell, he broke his neck in 2 places. immediately he was in pain no longer. when his heart stopped, the team asked if he was dnr. i said i thought so. ultimately, i had to make the decision for them to stop. my mom was hurting so bad. her lifelong friend is dead. 2 years earlier, my brother died from renal cell carcinoma. in between, she had lost her sister. it had been a hard 3 years for her.
i say all this to say this: when i dropped the players off today at the gym, one of them was delayed getting off the bus. he seems to be a pretty well grounded guy. after about 5 minutes he got off the bus apologizing for the delay. he said he was talking to his dad and was apparently getting some advice. i told him no problem as i thought i sure wish i could talk to mine.
if your dad is still living, take a moment to call him if just to say hi. you never know if this may be your last chance.
until next time...

Just Another Road Win/Feelings

2007-05-03T09:47:00.000-07:00

okay, we won. big deal? yes it is!!! anytime you win on the road, it is a good thing and yes, a big deal.
we left yesterday and it was a beautiful day to be on the road. sunny, mid 80's. it was a beautiful night for baseball. the team we are playing has a better record than us. we also had 3 or 4 players be "sent up" so that was great for them and their careers. now we have some new faces and to watch them come in and contribute like they did shows the professionalism they already have. in hanging around ballparks, i see a lot of people. most are very nice and share the same passion for baseball that i do. some look like the people your parents warned you about when growing up. the guys i am around have always been very respectful and i could not ask for better working relationships. i can't say enough good things about them. when we visit other parks and i see some of the other players and their attitudes, i know i am blessed (started to say lucky. see previous blog about luck).
while at the game last night, my 8 year old called me crying and told me she wanted me to come home and be with her. it rips your heart out when your kids do this. especially when it is day 1 of a 10 day trip. as i talked to her trying to calm her down and tell her how much i wanted to be with her and i loved her, it occurred to me she was in trouble with her mother!!! she was telling me about a house in their neighborhood for sale and she wanted me to buy it so she and her brother could ride their bicycles to see me. i knew then she was in deep trouble. and hurting.
as i think about her trying to express to me what she was really feeling, don't we as adults do the same thing? we are feeling something we can't, or won't, express so it comes out it a way that is different. we get mad at loved ones or friends over something small when that was not the root. as someone told me, "tell me what you think and i am not much help. tell me what you are feeling and i will do all i can to help". kids, as well as adults communicate much the same. sometimes we don't want to know what others are feeling. if we truly care, we will take the time to find out.
until next time...

Is It Just Me Or What?

2007-05-01T18:36:00.002-07:00

well, i am not vain enough to believe anything in this world is about me nor is my ego that large. my baseball team has dropped 5 or 6 games since i went to washington. the 2 games i went to before i left they won. tomorrow we are back on the road for 11 days. 5 games in birmingham and 5 games in montgomery then we return. when i am with them, they win.
my 8 year old had a softball game tonight. while she did not hit a home run, she got on base 3 times and scored twice. they won 14-10. they won last night also. coincidence? probably.
so what is it that brings us "good luck" or is their such a thing as luck? i don't believe in it good or bad. i do believe that there are things or people that make us feel better about ourselves and we find strength from that feeling. but when it comes down to it, it is the ability within us that makes us win or at least go that little extra and most times that is the difference. i am glad that i am not the instrument that brings luck, good or bad. i don't want that burden. i do try to to be an encourager and as a friend once said, "i'm just trying to be a blessing" and i like that philosophy.
life is to short to be around people that put us down or make us feel bad.
recently my son had an incident that left him feeling bad about himself. children can be so cruel to other children. not knowing how to express it, it came out inappropriately. i was talking to him about (actually probing which is a nice word for interrogation) and it finally hit me it was becoming a self image issue. if you are around enough bad influence we begin to believe what others are telling us. i have also figured out it is their attempt to feel better about themselves. as i told him, when you are around people that put you down, turn around, tell them to get a good look at your butt because that is the last they are going to see of you. and leave. and next time they want to play, or with adults hang out or whatever, remind yourself of the last incident and say no. it is not negotiable except for them to change the way they treat you. it is not up to you to take crap from from people. jesus did not take crap from people. he got up, dusted his sandals off and headed on down the road. he found people who would listen to his message and did not waste time on those who gave him crap. maybe my language is strong here and crap offends some of you but you know what i am saying. hurt my children or someone i love and it brings out the ugly in me.
until next time...

WiFi And Other Ramblings

2007-04-30T18:21:00.000-07:00

i am sitting at a local amusement park. myself and 4 other buses from our company picked up a middle school band for a fun day trip. i am sitting here on my bus surfing the internet. one of the best creations i have seen. i am amazed that technology has advanced so much. i mentioned earlier about my ideas on “roughing it” and i must add being in an area without wi-fi is near the top.

as i think about things i marvel over, the second one has to be those flashlights that don’t require batteries. just shake and turn on. i have had mine for about 2-3 years and carry it in my briefcase. as a matter of fact, i bought my children some to keep in their rooms. i had one of those big mag-lights with 4 “d” cell batteries. whenever the power would go out, it was usually dead because the kids played with it and ran the batteries down. not any more. just shake and now they have light. every time, just when they need it. and with my own, i don’t have to wonder if i will have light or not.

the future for our children is exciting to the point of being scary. new inventions and creations that seem “rocket science” will become a part of their daily routine just like cell phones with cameras and mp3 players in one package. the scary part is what direction will science go in their lifetime? cloning scares me. will my kids have the ability to re-create themselves just like their mother, me and God did? it scares me to think that our children of tomorrow may not actually be people but some new form of “test tube” baby. i also wonder if the morals we hold sacred in our “civilized” society will be replaced or relaxed to the point of no longer being anything close to what we hold dear.

as i said, exciting. really exciting. and scary. really scary

Until next time…

Home Run Queen

2007-04-30T18:18:00.000-07:00

my 8 year old daughter amazes me. as a matter of fact, all of my children do. i was able to go to her softball game friday night. it was her first game i have been able to see this year. she hit a home run!!! in their league nobody hits over the fence. theirs are the hard way. the term “round tripper” is true. they hit the ball and keep running until they are out or “blue” calls “time” which is a nice way of staying stop or the play has ended. she has had one home run every year and i was so thankful she did it with me there to see it. God smile on drunks, idiots and bus drivers alike, i am glad i fit 2 of those categories (i don’t drink). she went 3-4 tonight and she had a great game defensively. no errors. to bad she can’t play in the majors. softball is her thing. every child has a thing. with my 14 year old it is her voice. i cried the first time i heard her sing to a crowd at a family event. her voice is incredible and i have no doubt she will sing professionally one day soon. if angels had voices, it would be hers. i will not tell you her name as i use no names so i can keep this anonymous. you will hear about her one day. my 8 year old is softball. my 9 year old is gifted athletically so i guess his thing will be basketball. his ball skills are amazing. as for my 20 year old, her thing is just being herself. she is going thru some life changing events and i know she will be an entirely different person on the other side. she has a long way to go but i know God is lifting her with some strong wings. as the eagle flies thru the storm with confidence, she will too. they are all different and unique and i love them so much. they will never do anything to make me stop loving them and praying for them.

i am proud of them all. equally and unconditionally.

until next time…

Back Home Again

2007-04-30T18:17:00.000-07:00

arrived home about 0600 friday morning. while in manassas, my 9 year old called me and told me about tornadoes in our area. after checking and receiving another call from a friend, i found out that there was active tornadic activity in our area. i called the owner of the company and told him where i was and what my concerns were. he was going to watch the weather channel and get on his computer and let me know if anything serious was in my path. my phone never rang. i told my son not to worry, dad was coming home and i was bringing all my passengers home and i was going to do it safely. i have a healthy respect for life. i once had a flight instructor tell me from day one his plan was to go home to his family every night. i figured with that philosophy, i was going to go home too. in other words, he would do all he could to stay alive. some of my previous instructors attitudes were “we all gotta die sometime”. not very comforting your first time up.

anyway, he was concerned and told me he did not want to lose his dad. he wanted me to come home again. alive. he couldn’t say what he was feeling but i was able to figure it out. when your kids tell you that, it gets kinda sloppy if you know what i mean.

the trip back was fairly uneventful. we ran into some heavy rain but little wind. that prayer stuff works.

by the way, i saw geese earlier in the day!!!

until next time...

Thursday in Washington

2007-04-30T18:16:00.000-07:00

it is thursday and we leave for home tonight. kinda sad, kinda glad. washington is a great place. i could easily get lost in history and time here. good thing i don’t have the time and money.

Today is like a day off. take my group into dc, drop them and return to the hotel. law says i must take 8 hours off and rest before i go pick them up and take them to manassas for dinner. going to stop by iwo jima on the way out.

funny thing i have noticed about washington. yes, i am about to get political here. it seems to me the debate of separation of church is dumb. the national cathedral and the basilica (largest roman catholic church in America) are here. when you look at our founding fathers, they founded this country using christian/biblical guidance. study them and you will find all but 2 or 3 were also leaders in their churches. as i look around at our monuments, the reference to God is written on them in some way. our currency says “in God we trust”. every time I find a penny, i get a reminder that truly in God i trust. our nation’s highest courts open with a prayer as well as the house and the senate. some even (still) have the ten commandments hanging on their walls. either the senate or the house has its own chaplain. when did we and where did we get the idea that God and country were separate. even the boy scouts have a reference (merit badge?) to God and country.

so, what happened? ever listen to the song by carman called “we need god in America again”? cool song, awesome lyrics. we truly do need god in America. anyway, bad weather is coming. the storm does have tornadic activity with heavy rainfall so the trip back tonight might be ugly. at least driving during the day you can see what is coming. at night, you can’t see the clouds or other weather events. may be a good thing after all.

until next time…

Back In Washington

2007-04-24T19:06:00.000-07:00

today was day 2 of my trip back to washington, d.c. i like washington. it is a great place to visit. the biggest problem bus drivers have is bus drivers!!! that is a another story and when i find the driver who cut me off and forced me up on curb i am sure i will go to jail for assault and battery. hope there is some dna to identify the remains cause it will be ugly.
anyway, the group i am with is a good group. the kids are no problem (hats off) and the chaperones are alot of fun to be with so it makes for a great time.
weather here is incredible. today it was sunny and in the low 80's. washington has a no idle law which if i am lucky enough to find a place to park, i can't idle more than 5 minutes without shutting down. i even had a bean sprouts and tofu eater on a bicycle remind me of this. he pulled up to my open door and never made eye contact with me. about 15 minutes later, i shut down. this was after the encounter with the anchor trailways driver. the guy on the bicycle is #2 on my list.
i have no #3 but the day is not over. anyway, back to the story. if i can't idle, no air conditioning. i know what you are thinking and yes, i like my "comforts". i do not go camping. too hot, too many bugs. if i stay in a hotel without room service, that is my way of "roughing it". camping to me involves something with at least 6 wheels and a generator, but i am straying from the blog intent.
anyway, i will miss this group. we leave thursday night about 2100 and it is about 625 miles to get them home. another driver will take them the rest of they way so i should get in bed around 1000.
arlington was as usual. a very real, somber place. there were so many funerals today. i heard so many 21 gun salutes and cannons firing that i felt like it was a war going on. when i go there, i think about so many who fought for me to have the freedoms i enjoy today. if not for their sacrifices, you might not be reading this blog. as a matter, there might be no internet (al gore did not invent the internet). please, next time you meet a vet or have a family member who served, just tell him, or her, thanks. a simple thanks goes a long way. you may be the first person who ever did that. i remember several years ago i started doing this after witnessing something absolutely incredible. i was at the airport to pick up my ex who was not my ex at the time. during this time, i saw an older man and woman standing with a young (20's?) lady holding an infant. person after person came thru the secure area. i could tell they were getting anxious and finally i saw him. he was still dressed in his desert fatigues. he hugged everybody and then they sat down. the young lady handed him the infant and he held it so carefully. as i watched, he was embracing the child and heard the older woman say, "how do you like your daughter". it finally hit me that he was holding his child for the first time. a wave of emotion came over me. i stood there with tears streaming down my face thanking god for being able to witness this very emotional time. as i wiped my face, he looked at me with so much in his eyes; he was so proud and happy. i whispered a soft "thank you". he looked straight at me, knowing what i was trying to say. he nodded and went back to that moment. i looked up and saw my wife standing there. i hugged her and no more than 10 seconds later asked her if she saw the family on the bench. she said, "what family?". i looked and they were gone. i looked up and down the corridor and they were no where to be found.
until next time...

I Don't Need a 12 Step Program

2007-04-22T20:02:00.000-07:00

okay, i have a problem. people you are in the counseling business and most say if the patient will admit to their addiction, treatment goes better and faster. well, i am in denial and i plan to stay that way.
tonight marks my 7 baseball game in 7 days and if there were anyway for me to be there tomorrow i would. i love being at the park. i love the smell of hot dogs cooking. i love the smell of the water while the field being prepped by the grounds crew. most of all, it is the sound a wooden bat makes at it makes contact with the ball. CRACK!!! in the last 7 days, my team has won 6 of 7 games, most by shutout. one of the assistant coaches tells me they win when i am there. it kinda looks that way. i have witnessed their record with me there go 8-4. that is a record any team should be proud of.
tomorrow i go back to washington. i am excited but i am sad to have to tell my daughter i won't be there for her softball game and my son his field trip to watch, you guessed it, my team play baseball. i will be back friday so i will get to see some of what i have been missing.
until next time...

Back Home

2007-04-21T00:18:00.000-07:00

finally made it back home and it feels good. the road trip was incredible-we won 4 of 5 games and to do that on the road is quite remarkable. the "boys" are very respectful towards me and never cause me any problems. it would be so easy for this group of future major leaguers to be cocky and arrogant, but they are not. the are quite humble as a matter of fact.
as i write this, i have been talking to another one of our drivers who has become my best friend. jack is on his way to washington, d.c. and it is 0330. i have the weekend off and am going to watch a baseball game with my 2 youngest children. i sure wish i was taking all 4. maybe soon. you would think i would be tired of baseball but i am not. tomorrow, or actually today will be my 6th game in 6 days. if i could i would go sunday night but i have got to take advantage of being home and going to my home church. i am thirsty and need to drink deep from the well. i think the last time i went to my own church was sometime in march and will have been about 7-8 weeks since i was there. i am looking forward to it more than i can say.
monday morning i leave for 5 days in d.c. and i am looking forward to going. i like washington but i was really needing the 5 days off i was supposed to be taking. when i get back, i will have a few days off before i go back on an 11 day road trip. yes, it is baseball so i will get 11 games in 11 days. i just promised my kids i would be here. it kills me to tell them i am going to be here and then tell them i can't. i missed a lot of my 2 older children's lives. they moved about 3 hours way about 10 years ago. my time with them is very limited and i promised i would never become numb to the fact that they moved. i still try to call them most every night. i understand that with their ages, 20 and 14 that they have their own lives and friends and i try to make exceptions in visiting. never will i let got of them, never.
if you are reading this, please take the time to comment on this blog. i would appreciate any feedback about what this blog doing to other people. please, this is read by church, friends and family so keep that in mind as far as language.
until next time...

Correction and Apology, Game 4

2007-04-19T20:38:00.000-07:00

today, a dear friend brought something to my attention and i must admit, i am embarrassed about it. typing letters in all lowercase has been a "trademark" of mine. even while working for fortune 500 companies. there was even one company where we turned the page sideways. it's one of those things that set us apart and in the business world you do things that set you apart. to put it simply, do what it takes so people will remember you. this is not something to remember me for anymore.
in earlier posts, i referred to God and Jesus in lower case. my friend, whom i do admire and respect, suggested to me it should be capitalized. once i heard him say this, i knew he was right and i must make apologies if i offended anyone and i apologize to him if i did offend him. he is right; God and Jesus should be capitalized and no justification will cover this. if i am who i say i am, then i must do all i can to show who i put first in my life with proper respect. dan, i am thankful for your attention and bringing this up. i value our friendship and look forward to more trips with you.
now, it's baseball time. tonight we lost a close game. one of our "big guns" cranked out his first home run of the season. it was a huge shot out of the park. in my estimation it went about 400'. i normally don't complain about calls that "blue" makes but our last 2 outs were way off base, the last one literally. our batter had already crossed first before the ball hit the first basemans glove. bad call but there is nothing you can do. no instant replay or challenges.
it has been a great trip as we have won 3 of 4 games with the 5th and last game tomorrow night. after the game we leave for home which is about a 2 hour drive putting me at home between 0200 and 0300.
until next time...

God Looks Like A Goose

2007-04-18T13:32:00.000-07:00

well, no. scripture tells us we are made in his image. so hang on, stick with me here.
as i look around, i sometimes find it hard to believe god is anywhere around. sickness, war, people killing each other plus a whole lot of other stuff i don't understand. i am sure some are wondering where god was when all those students and teachers were being killed one by one at virginia tech. i don't know. i am sure he was there in some way and some how there will be stories that will surface that will show his hand some way.
being on the road as much as i am, i do not get to go to my home church very often.i miss that group of believers and there are times i really need a dose of god. his medicine is good for my soul. sometimes i get in situations while driving that scare me. it may be a new city, a way i have never gone or it could just be the moment i am in. regardless, i need god and i need him more at that moment. and then it happens. it is what i call a "god moment". it is where i am able to see god in a very real way. he lets me know that he is there with me and he is always right on time. how does he do it? geese. yep, the big bird that flies in the air. kinda odd, isn't it? god knows how i love his creation and i marvel at birds. hummingbirds and geese. nothing quite like a flock of geese flying over on a moonlit, fall evening.
the first time i drove a bus to washington, d.c., i was apprehensive which is nice word for scared. i was praying for god to show me the way and help me get my passengers there safely. just as soon as i was finished praying, a flock of geese flew very low over me. immediately i felt at peace and knew he was there with me. since then, this has happened many times over. i know it is kinda whacky. i have mentioned my god moments to other people and they have similar stories although theirs are not geese. it is very real to me and i can't describe the feeling. i just know it works.
will it work for you? i don't know. ask him, not me. next time you see a flock of geese, just know someone, somewhere, is having a god moment.
until next time...

Livin' A Dream in Chattanooga

2007-04-17T21:01:00.000-07:00

well, i am back on the road with the "boys of summer" and it has been a great trip. 2 games, 2 wins over the #1 ranked team in their division standings. 2 games, 2 days, 2 wins!!! definately moves us up in the standings. we are now 5 and 5.
it is very cool to be with these guys. i am a "baseball junkie" and this is supporting my habit. it was a childhood dream of mine to play major league baseball as a kid. to be a part of this takes me back to my childhood. i was raised by "ward and june cleaver" for parents. dad worked, mom stayed at home and was she always there when i got home from school. what happened to the rest of my life is still a mystery. but i had a good start!!!
had a chance to try out for the cincinnati reds back in 1974 or 1975 just after graduating from high school. a man who ran our recreation league was a scout and was a very nice man. always fair and treated everybody with respect. his name was "dunk" and had a horrible speech impediment. kids made fun of him and it was not fair. they treated him very badly as kids do, but he loved them anyway. what a heart for kids and baseball he had. just before i was going to meet with him, i cut 2 fingers off my right hand. since i was a right handed pitcher, that was the end of that. although i had them re-attached, a dream was lost. now, through these guys, i get to live at least a part of it. i have always heard that if you aren't living your dreams, you aren't living.
until next time...

Back Home

2007-04-15T18:22:00.000-07:00

wow, it is so good to be back home. as i sit here with my son, i am happy for the time with him but i sure do miss the other 3.
the trip to atlanta was great and i know the kids (and their parents) were happy to be back home and the dose of reality called school is only about 11 hours away as i write this. it was one of those trips that you just know will leave impressions on everyone. me included.
as i mentioned earlier, tomorrow i take the team to another city about 2 hours away. they will play a 5 game series and have the chance to improve their record to at least .500. their management team carries some impressive major league numbers as well as reputations with excellent standing. besides that, they all do great jobs teaching as well as coaching. reminds me of a local college coach i have had the pleasure of transporting. always teaching. anybody could coach with enough experience. take a special person to do both.
time for bed. it looks like i can get there before midnight for a change.
until next time...

Down Time

2007-04-11T12:16:00.000-07:00

got in last night around 2200 and called an old friend who told me he always had a place for me to sleep. took him up on his offer and it was good to kick back with an old friend and just laugh and talk. today, i slept in and it felt sooooo good. went to have lunch at school with my 2 youngest children and it was very emotional just to spend some time with them. i have 2 older children for a total of 4 and i miss them all the time. tonight, i will have more time with my 2 youngest. it is my intention that every time i see my kids to embarass them as much as possible by picking them up and squeezing them to their eyeballs pop out. mix that in with a few kisses and you are guaranteed to embarass them in front of all their friends. outside of my relationship with christ, they are the most important things in my life. i have been blessed beyond measure to have the 4 children i have. they are so special to me.
today is the first day for quite some time i haven't driven. i was looking at my calendar and it looks like about another 2-3 weeks before i will see some more "kick back time". i love what i do but it is very exhausting at times and i would not trade it for any other job except maybe shooting pictures.
gotta go squeeze the kids some more. until next time.......

Back Home

2007-04-10T22:50:00.000-07:00

got in from jacksonville early this morning and was tired after driving thru 4 states to get home. good trip and i am looking forward to making many more with these group of guys. it still leaves me asking the same questions as i said in the last post. i look and see opportunities and wonder what lies ahead for them in their careers as well as mine.

today is a much different day with a much different group of people. they are are from the midwest and are touring manufacturing facilities for some products they sell. pretty cut and dry; pick them up at point “a” and take them to point “b”. then reverse the process. not much time or opportunity to really bond with them or find out that much about them. these types of trips are some of the hardest. just faces sitting on my bus for about an hour and then they are gone. no getting to know them, their families or anything else. the only reward I get will be an addition to my paycheck. i started doing what i do and yes it was for the pay. somewhere along the way i realized that it’s not about the money if you are where god has placed you. the rewards are much greater than the pay. if the only reason you are doing what you do for the money then you are doing it for the wrong reasons. it took me a very long time to realize that when i die i’m dead and never have i seen a moving van behind a hearse. my rewards are stored up in heaven. the work i do is for god and not for any man or corporation. i have no glory and never will. it is all for him and his glory. i am not included. i do know the one who has gone before me and he is getting closer to finishing my mansion with streets paved with gold with every day that passes. it is for eternity and no matter how long i live here on earth, eternity will be significantly longer. that is the only final thing we will ever encounter. period. there were times in my life the only thing i had to look forward to in life was dying. now the thing i look forward to the most is dying but for different reasons .i will see the creator face to face and boy, do i have a few questions!!!! and, most all of them begin with “how” and not “why”.

tomorrow will be my first day off in quite some time and i am ready to start some “kick back” time.

until next time…..

Jacksonville

2007-04-08T18:45:00.000-07:00

well, this is my last night in jacksonville. i am traveling with a professional baseball team and it has been a great trip. yesterday as i watched my team win, i was blindsided when one of the players asked me if i would take them to church (easter sunday). of course my answer was yes but only if i could go. we got up and hit the road about 0930 for a 1030 service. it was an amazing church (first baptist church-jacksonville). i have been in smaller coliseums!!! dr. mac brunson delivered a wonderful message but it just did not have the feel of my home church. there were four of us going to church and i was feeling some things that i was ambivalent about. let me explain. i have driven lots of commercial-type vehicles and it was only a boring job. one sunday morning as i was sitting in my old church parking lot, i saw our church bus and knew it was not being used on a regular basis. i thought, could i use this bus to further god's kingdom? the answer was a "fuzzy" yes. as some time went by, i met a man who was a retired methodist minister who was driving part-time for a local, well respected company. we struck up a friendship and talked about buses and some more of the puzzle started to fit. i had driven some private coaches and i thought i had a pretty good feel for what it would be like. i knew god was pointing me in a direction of buses and some type of ministry. how the two are connected, i still am not sure. now, back to this morning. has god put me here to be someone who finally starts a "bus ministry" or is it much more than that? am i here at this time and place by accident or did god put me here to be some sort of guide for these guys? i know all the things to say about my relationship with christ and how it keeps me grounded and how i can not imagine living a life without him but can i say it to them? will my life experiences be able to help them see that no matter how many millions of dollars they could make will ever matter until they find a god who loves them unconditionally and in no way dependent on how well they play, their bank accounts, or what they spend their money on? how do i tell them their lives will be okay if they never make it to the big leagues? as you can tell i have become very attached to these guys and i truly care about them. i only have this opportunity 'til the end of summer. am i living my life in a way that will show them the christ in me or will they see someone who still slips and falls just like the will slip and fall? is there any chance i can show them a better way? i must admit that right now as i write this, i am scared at all that could be at stake here. also, am i just here to plant seeds? i can't make them accept christ and i can't make them believe in something more than they are. there are times i wonder what people see in me let alone who. all i can do at this point is hope, trust and believe god's plan for me.